bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №46144
 18.04.2011
A dinner for two:

He: Light, what shampoo are you going to be?
See also: Garnier
He: Okay, I will look for it.
He is fucking...

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №46143
 18.04.2011
My favorite education is Kazakhstan.
The cost at the State University, 1 year of study - 220 000 our diners.(All cars are worse than Merin 2008). Buy a diploma of this universe - costs 300,000 our diners.with full documentation, checklist where all sessions are marked, participation in the lists of students for 5 years.
Fuck... let me buy it cheaper... sorry only, knowledge he does not give (

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №46142
 18.04.2011
Discover the terrorist attacks. Fast, high quality and cheap.
of Belarus.

[ + 323 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №46141
 18.04.2011
I did not think I would write, but my mom is seriously ill and the condition is not improving, please support, your positive energy will help her!

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №46140
 18.04.2011
13:51:42: Oh that happiness was :D
13:51:47 What was it?
13:55:03: We launched the sandwashing camera at the shop, no matter what it is. And one of the workers of her service that same day got drunk and fell asleep there, hugged with this sandwasher. He gave an explanation today. "I, such-as-as, such-as number washed the launch of the sandwashing camera for its good work." On the operative morning read, penetrated and decided not to punish it :-D

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №46139
 18.04.2011
14:53:43 [OgeccuT] say something like that.. so that the moustaches on the skin go)
14:54:34 [Cristaliz] Gay parade

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №46138
 18.04.2011
Medvedev found a way to make drugs on the Internet."

The president is missing.

[ + 87 - ] Comment quote №46137
 18.04.2011
burzum: I went yesterday with a friend in the elevator, accidentally pressing the elevator call button
Listening to elevator
friend: two meat grills grill, spatial sauce cheese, cucumbers, salad and onion all on a bakery with a mouthpiece!!! to
Elevator (30 seconds of thought) your order is ready!
Tags: I was crying

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №46136
 18.04.2011
I bought a carpet with the inscription DANGER!!My husband said I should wear it 5 days a month.

[ + 88 - ] Comment quote №46135
 18.04.2011
The Prisoner:
We go with the red in the park. In front of her, a young mother cheats her little son. He notices a redhead and threatens his son, saying:
- You will behave badly - that big bald uncle will punish you!
The child smiles in his mouth:
It will not punish!
Why not punish it? Mami is stumbling. Look what a terrible uncle!
"The Terrible Uncle" is pushing the bark with all his strength. The child criticizes his mother:
Uncle is not good, uncle is good. There is a son in our garden. And he kisses him. So 100 if you will behave foolishly, he will punish you!
"The Terrible Uncle" can’t stand and jump out of laughter. The punch mom takes the baby under the mouse and grows in horror.

[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №46134
 18.04.2011
No, it is not like people.
After drinking I wake up in an unfamiliar place.
I know, with an unknown guy.
Oh yeah, I am...
xxx:Wake up at home, the computer is on, and on the download - the WoW game client
I’d better wake up with my boyfriend.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №46133
 18.04.2011
The action takes place in honey.
Prepod is late for 30 minutes, our already spit into the ceiling - to do a nephig. There is one who pronounces the tirade: "Vasya (prepod) podi is now awake, fries an egg and thinks: here is the fucking, late, no, anyway these fools don't know the farm and don't learn it." At the same time, he says this, sitting at the lecture table and playing something on the phone. At this moment there is a rushing...

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №46132
 18.04.2011
A friend called and rushed where to buy her a deflorator. I had difficulty answering her. It turned out that a regular depilator was needed.

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №46131
 18.04.2011
From the sims2 forum:
A: The social worker took the child! What to do?
B is Hello! Also also? How to return a family member, but selected by the social service, baby? and husband how to return? Thanks in advance :)
Q: Has your husband been taken by the social service? :D
B: - not my husband I myself pulled out of the house:(Karoche is now visiting, jealous scandals scandal whistle, beats, and I did it (Return his hottu:(
D: No, my husband is just a gentleman. I don’t know about baby.
E: A friend came to me from work, held my child in his arms all night and eventually took it with him, a goat!
F: -A, when I have a social worker I sell the child, sometimes after the sale comes the police.

[ + 86 - ] Comment quote №46130
 18.04.2011
I have a shell of grenade, it stands above the computer. There are all kinds of bombs behind the grenade.
The younger brother played intense pointblank, and there means when someone throws a grenade, a whispering cry goes into the timchat: “Granate!!!” Well, he plays, I pulled through him for a charge and dropped the mole on the table right in front of him. And at this moment the scream from the columns was like a grenade!!! to
The brother shouting, clashing and falling escaped to another room in another room, explained that he thought that the grenade from the game has flown out.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №46129
 18.04.2011
After the reform, the wages of doctors will rise from 12 thousand to 10 thousand. The"

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №46128
 18.04.2011
Yulia
How to feel yourself?

Ivan is
I am still sick:

Yulia
Have fun!

Ivan is
I am sick! :D

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №46127
 18.04.2011
Vitiok: If I lived in the same city with AI developers, I would have been sitting for their murder for a long time, and I would have millions of transmitters wearing it.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №46126
 18.04.2011
She says: Badawaam!! to
Is he drunk?
She is: No! I do not drink and do not advise.
He is: and right! Drinking and advising are two bad habits dangerous to health.

[ + 63 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №46125
 18.04.2011
The adviser to the president revealed the reason why parents are unwilling to give their children to freezers.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna