bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №3093
 30.03.2008
The user burned the day. I saw on the telecast in some useful tips that the key is better washed by forging all the buttons, folding in a bowl and pouring water + ferry solution. It says "I also want to, can you?". Well wave it. Within an hour, it all shines up: "I did it all! And I can put the buttons along the alphabet at the same time, or it's so inconvenient for me to print when they are overwhelming"...

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №3092
 30.03.2008
Light: I recently found a recipe book from a friend. I open up on salads. I read: "Wonderkind Salad" and there is one of the ingredients of 300g. The brain is terrible to think of. Read the following recipe: "Student Salad". Ingredients are heavier than wunderkind, except one. for the place of 300g of brains, 200g of LIBER. The question of education is exhausted...))))

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №3091
 30.03.2008
Changed the cushion in the office, respectively, at night, when the least users, in the morning like everything works... soon grew in times - the goals were achieved...
The first call in the morning is not inert, as usual, the head is heavy no matter what to think... I answer
- Well reinstall the window - I thought it will think, ask what is it? then call if it doesn't work...
He hangs the phone.
Everyone has a call, I don’t think it’s okay, good morning, good morning.
Stash 2 with the likeness of thousands of uswires are sitting without a net - to dig into the ground and die...
while dealing with the cisco - as it turned out there was a limit of 100 users - thought the carnival came...
Well, all went well, the world was saved.
And the first one calls - and says - Thank you you know helped :) and then it became so easy :)

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №3090
 30.03.2008
kurnenkova:...I decided yesterday evening from the nephig to see how the vibrator is still arranged.
I looked at you fucking. Understanding the components.
... now it will have to be folded - when it was disassembled, it completely cut off the main vibrating shit. Well, what - she was on such spots that my mother didn't burn. and ?
China is fucking :)

... the only question now is how to explain to the guys why I needed the solder... :)))

Joe_dante: Ggggg! And it will be like this:

Do you borrow a solder?
Why Why?
The vibrator is broken (
Why is it a paddle? Or maybe a strawberries at least?! to

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №3089
 30.03.2008
I sat in one company with them on a network of 30 copies to each webcam bought a seat set up.
The director was sitting with me until 9 p.m. and then swallowed and closed the cabinets where everything was done and put them on the alarm and left.
I finished everything and as asked, I decided to print the report, at half the eleventh, the eyes are already coming down, there is no printer in the first grid, after a few seconds such a sound, and I think everything was printed, I came out of the door to close. They beat my hands, they hit my head, I cut off.

It turned out to be a signal on the paper coming out of the printer worked and on the street were waiting for me guys from the native CHOP)))

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №3088
 30.03.2008
Vivis: Are you silent?? to

Star Wind: They carry eggs!
Do you think it’s easy to carry eggs?? to

Vivis: What are you carrying them?

Star Wind: I just carry them. by life. They are covered down to me.

Tagged: hm

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №3087
 30.03.2008
Onix: We sit with employees drinking tea. As one of the students passes by, he throws a discette into the urn nearby in the corner. The whole lab choir: "Are you sure you want to put the contents of the discette in the basket?and "

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №3086
 30.03.2008
Appeal to DarkRider:
Dear Dark, you, as the father of all the Russian bujorga, have always satisfied the reader with great quotes, the quotes you made were the most funny... but, you have started hiring too many other models, we understand that the quotation is very much and you yourself cannot cope with such a number. Yes, for example, Aalien often apruvit good quotes, but there is one modern.
His nick is Zoi, he apruvited a dozen quotes, apparently believing that the quantity is more funny than the quality and the expedition does not understand that people are already laughing at Zoe and not the quotes. A huge request, if not to remove him from the position of a fashionista, so at least to hold a lecture, during which he will be explained that it is not necessary to crush the dumbest messes. Zoe became like a Petrosian, just as boring and without a sense of humor.
I sincerely hope for understanding and support from both the Dark Rider and the Boorga readers.
Good luck all day.

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №3085
 30.03.2008
Sharm: Max, according to the law adopted by the United Nations, you can’t eat beings with an IQ greater than your own.
Cool: And what?
Sharm: Put the Mandarin!! to

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №3084
 30.03.2008
Onix: We sit with employees drinking tea. As one of the students passes by, he throws a discette into the urn nearby in the corner. The whole lab choir: "Are you sure you want to put the contents of the discette in the basket?"... There is no scene and wild rust.
MedveD: What the wind people brought to...

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №3083
 30.03.2008
If there is a war between the Russians and the Americans, the latter will win. They have Norris.
We have a Wassermann. While the Chak will hit his foot from the turn with the speed of light, the Wassermann will have time to calculate the trajectory, the force of the impact and scratch the Chak in the shoe, which will weigh him, and the trajectory and angle to the horizon will change. In this way, the earth is fucking fucking and it is shattered by the force of the reaction of the support of the earth. You are the champions!

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №3082
 30.03.2008
Q: Where do we meet?
NN: and go near Libra, there is a museum somewhere near the car
Q: Is this the place where people have recently fallen?
NN: Yes, there is a stand.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №3081
 30.03.2008
Tagged with "Our Pasha":

and Sverdlovsk. The glamorous expulsion of Russia.
It is here in the beauty salon "Smile" works Pasha - the world's first hairdresser-stylist with a traditional sexual orientation.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №3080
 30.03.2008
Shaitan: The phone just ringed. I pick up the phone, from there "subscriber is temporarily unavailable"
Shaitan: I missed something?

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №3079
 30.03.2008
Scan documents for the device to work, including The Attestation. Answer from the other side of the aska:
What do you have to do with a trio? And also admin...

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №3078
 30.03.2008
Adam and Eve are in the garden, God comes down to them and says, "My children, I have two gifts for you, only you have to decide which one."The first gift is to write standing. And Adam ran through the garden, rejoicing, jumping, shouting, sucking on everything in a row! On the trees, on the flowers, on every bowl and just on the ground! Eve stood up next to God... In silence they looked together at this madness... And then Eve asked, “My God, and the second is what gift?” And God said: Brain, Eve... Brain.

Why did he never give her it?

Why did you give both gifts to Adam?

She is a shit :(

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №3077
 30.03.2008
Movement is life.

The progressive movement is sexual life.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №3076
 30.03.2008
Stories about cars and trains.



A long time ago, when I studied at the military department, we were a course officer.

He told a story from the service in the GDR. I do not claim truthfulness.

The own history.



On the march from the column behind the communication machine on the base of ZIL 131 with kung and

The R-409 relay station. There was a small breakdown there.

Late for 3 hours. We decided to catch a short path where we had to cross.

Waiting for a move, of course, without a slug.

And when they tried to cross the rails, they once again had some hiccups and

The car remained.

As it should have happened, the train went. The driver did not realize that they

They were stunned (well, it didn’t fit in the German brain that it could be like this car.

put on the front of the train), walked, walked, and stopped started,

When it came to him.

In short, as a result of 30 meters pulled this Zila along the paths. Victims are not

There was, the relay station turned, and Zila remembered specifically. The machinery,

Naturally not to blame.



But this is only the beginning, a week later in another Soviet v/h in the territory.

GDR, our guys noticed something, they found little and they went.

on the BTR to change the slice in tomato sauce (the Germans did not make such canned foods,

They liked the local snacks.

And when they returned to the BTR, and it was already dark, they went astray.

I saw a car and probably there was a road.

It was really a road, only a railroad and the diesel was driven by it.

Station without wagons. In short, the Soviet BTR

He dropped the diesel from the roads, crossed through it and struck his nose into the ground.

No casualties, but with injuries.



So the next morning German newspapers came out with the headline "Vengeance".

The Russians, in full seriousness, described how the Russians pursued

German diesel and revenge for Zila.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №3075
 30.03.2008
Medical Institute of Medicine. The Teacher:

Don’t throw away the garlic after the first couple of years.

Medical practitioners, you will still need them.

[ + 87 - ] Comment quote №3074
 29.03.2008
This is how it happens:
I was fired because I went online. Yes yes exactly! From the IT company!! to
Using this opportunity, I would like to greet the First Deputy Director General (read as “Pidora”) and say to him: YOU ARE GANDON!
I know, many of this company read well: You normal greetings :)

P.S If it’s not difficult, we plush :)

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