bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №130219
 02.07.2016
In ancient Egypt, for example, some pyramid builders were given four to five liters of drink per day. In ancient times, alcohol was perceived as an important source of nutrients.

Oh how! And the scientists then broke their heads: Well, how were these pyramids built? A crowd of buchy men - and one ancient mystery less. What you can’t do without sleeping...

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №130218
 02.07.2016
Keanu Reeves has announced the shooting of two new parts of the "Matrix".

The directors are the same.

The Wachowski brothers did well. Will the sisters be able to?

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №130217
 02.07.2016
When the fifth iPhone was released, there was a bunch of advertising about holograms. I was sure that such a technology is now impossible, but all my acquaintances proved to me that there would be a hologram - the result is expected.
Everyone is ready to prove their right, but at least one would admit their mistake when it is discovered.

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №130216
 02.07.2016
Che: The jokes were jokes, and when I was a schoolboy and the girls sent me to buy food for the party, asking me to buy spicy carrots - I sincerely picked up the carrots sharper (well, little of what the girls needed) and when I came I couldn't understand why the girls beat in hysterics from laughter.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №130215
 02.07.2016
Tag: forum about glasses
In 2006, he wrote about his wife's purchased lenses.
It writes: ". protection from computer radiation (?cactus sewn?and"

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №130214
 02.07.2016
From the discussion of the law "Jarova package":
Postcards on the roof to start breeding
After another round of sanctions, they can be eaten.
Maybe I’ll have more postal cows and pigs.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №130213
 02.07.2016
This dog:

The robbed dogs
I have a pudel.
and his feet.
I have Alabama.
I am injured.

It reminds me of something. I remembered what it reminded me:

I will give you in the eye.
I will invite my brother to the garden.
Your brother’s father will beat me.
My dad is stronger.

Growing up...

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №130212
 02.07.2016
about a cat - a lover of falling down, or even sleeping on shoes in the hallway:

Constantly lying on footwear, shoes, ballets

In the morning we humbly cleanse the wool from them, in vain try to explain to the cat that we no longer need to heat outdoors and insulate our shoes, he looks at us as poor and we, running, go to work.)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №130211
 02.07.2016
xxx: from the problem report: "The cause of the test stand crash: launching all subsystems simultaneously"
What else was needed to work right away?? to
That wasn’t in TZ. :)

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №130210
 02.07.2016

<lesi> but the transportation of the cat from one place to another - panic for a month
<lesi> I have all of them.
<Dude52> lesi: You just didn’t carry your car...

[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №130209
 02.07.2016
Yes, I hate dogs. Because they cheat.
I can still accept the dogs laughing when I walk past them on the street. This is a short-term phenomenon, unpleasant, but you can survive.
I live in the private sector. And some distant neighbors (through 3 or 4 sites, not to disassemble) live a dog that laughs for several hours in a row. In the day and at night. Closed windows don’t save – I can still hear.
I am tired. I have a headache. of those sounds. I fucking moved to the countryside to live in silence!! to
I don’t understand one thing: don’t the owners themselves bother this laughing under the windows?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №130208
 02.07.2016
Today I pick up the billboards at work, I did not notice how the boss approached... And quietly, somehow on me, and went away... Then I rumble that I have all this time quietly knocked under my nose: work, work, go on a note...

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №130207
 02.07.2016
XXX: Pleased at the Trauma Point
xxx: "Do you put the seams on or put on?"
XXX: And here is what I came up with...

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №130206
 02.07.2016
I was on a plane with Milosevic. Asked for a photo for memory, he refused. He says you first get someone like me, and then you’ll take a picture. And I say to him, "And you first get to, because of you, the deputy went to the doctor and cancelled three speeches - and fuck him fuck!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №130205
 02.07.2016
There are female haters. I’m not that, I love women. I hate the men that these women give. I am a hater!

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №130204
 02.07.2016
"What you think about, you become" and Bruce Lee.

I am talking about money and women. Am I a glamorous kiss?? to

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №130203
 02.07.2016
Pudels, alabais, in a shirt or without... but at least about understand why. Our neighbors brought a dog. I do not know much about the breeds, but looking at the puppy, I suspect that something will grow between the Baskerville dog and the mastiff. Neighbors are two gentle aunts and a small child. While the dog is kept on the balcony, the apartment is one-bedroom and all together they do not fit there. On the balcony, the dog is bored and she cries and cries all over the street, knocking the door into the room. I suspect he will soon find a way out. So I don’t understand what: what will we and the other neighbors do when the cute piss grow up? And why do people who are just not blown up by the wind make a dog the size of a pony?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №130202
 02.07.2016
Paradox: A person who has no place to give his time is often engaged in taking away time from others.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №130201
 02.07.2016
I work in a hospital, and one of our deputy chief physicians is a father in the temple at the hospital. Apparently therefore in many offices hang icons, including in mine - when I came they were already there and I, of course, did not change anything in this regard.
One day I go to work and I have an icon. She stood in the depths of the closet, there were no crossings on her, no one touched the closet, just herself suddenly flew out of her place and fell to the floor.
I am not superstitious at all, all kinds of black cats, twists, failures, "do not cross the road to the deceased" and other heresy on me do not work, but here it should be noted another important circumstance - at this very time through block-posts from Donetsk was a close person, and therefore in the light of excitement for him everything was perceived especially sharp and painful.
I decided to ask my dad. I worry, I say, so and so, what does it mean that the icon has fallen to the floor?
And he answers so seriously - it means that the nail was badly killed. And went on.
I lay straight.
Nothing bad happened that day. And the next day too.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №130200
 02.07.2016
Previously, a humanitarian was one who wrote poems and knew languages.
Now is the one who forgot the multiplication table.

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