bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №129179
 08.06.2016
The ability of a woman to offend in a flat place is a useful skill developed in the course of evolution.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №129178
 08.06.2016
I have married neighbors, both under a forty-hour, and here somehow I’m cooking dinner, looking out the window, and they’re running around the street, in pyjamas and barefoot, with water pistols, splashing on each other and whispering so loudly that I suddenly came across that I’m wasting time trying to build a perfect relationship, when in reality I just need a man who will laugh with me for the rest of my life.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129177
 08.06.2016
From the newspapers: "The State Duma has introduced a bill on criminal liability for inclination to suicide and assistance to it."
Interesting, and the establishment of the size of pensions and the cost of housing services will fall under this article?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №129176
 08.06.2016
As a child, my father forbade me to dive from various winds in running water. Of course I did not listen to him. The bottom is pierced twenty times, what can there be?! to

A cold, very muddy river with a fast flow and decent depth on the shore. From a rough slope made a dive. We froze and went to the fire.

After a while, a guy approaches (we are still at the fire) and jumps a little from the diving. It flows half alive. In the end, the guy has a few seams on his head. And under the tower was a flooded pine brought by the flow.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №129175
 08.06.2016
I had to work in the "nuts" trading network. I went to check out another store. A strict inspector asks if the sellers have checked the expiration date on the labels. I think about myself that it’s worth paying attention to nuts, once they’re worried about their deadline.. And I hear the seller’s answer: "Wsë okay, I recently sent it to the repairs". Oh, that’s it, and I thought.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №129174
 08.06.2016
And let the lawyers of the couch rush unwise to the nearest barrel, after their unnecessary Orbit or Snickers, and give me my 105 rubles and no longer get exhausted!
......
Only then will you run into the camp, because the duty to ensure the surrender lies on you. Buy the exchange in the bank, as normal shops do. You are obliged to pay up to the last penny.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №129173
 08.06.2016
The movie is a complete gesture, I absolutely do not recommend watching it.

So you understand how bad things are: I’ve been on the forum since 2007, and this is my first review that I’ve just written to warn you.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №129172
 08.06.2016
I also found the "Hobben and Everything" collection, maybe you meant it?
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
AAAAAAAA people, do you understand what you are doing? I read Hogbenov as a teenager in a self-publishing, an incredible format of terrible quality paper, a blossoming poorly read font.
And yesterday jumped - fucking, the children remained orphans, I didn't sleep almost today, and until I finish - I won't stop!! to

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №129171
 08.06.2016
It happened in one of the bars.
It is worth a DJ behind a bar stand - everyone knows, I think, what happens in small establishments when a DJ and a bar are combined? Here, a glamorous kiss begins to stick to the DJ, well, and they seem to have everything great - both get pleasure from both music and communication. Naturally, closer to the end of the set, his DJ offers the girl to go home with him. The answer is "I won’t go anywhere with you. You are a poor man!" DJ: "Why am I a poor man? I have a fresh Lexus parked at the bar and apartment in the center of Peter. Why am I poor?" What Kiso answers: "Now all normal DJs play with MacBook, and you are a miserable, you put music from the plates!"
The curtain...

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №129170
 08.06.2016
Keep in mind, in the event of a nuclear war, when people go to hide in shelters, all smokers will be left on the surface - smoking in the subway is prohibited.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №129169
 08.06.2016
Smart released: applications that discharge the battery and a list of these applications. At the top of the list hangs "energy saving mode".

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №129168
 08.06.2016
Ooooh, man, happiness is being held
and ==
I know there are many mothers here, so here is a huge request to you - don't walk with your children on the side of the road. even if there is a lawn, even if there are grasses and flowers, beautiful trees and other branches.
Yesterday a little boy, three years old, rushed under my wheel. He was just playing with the machine, and in a second he was already in the middle of the road. I would not have had time to slow down, although the speed was only 40-45km\h, but, fortunately, I turned around on an empty road.
Please do not allow this to happen because of the child's madness can happen irreparable
and ==
He is a baby, and you are a three-time car riding, you have to watch, the car is a source of increased danger!!!1111 Unity

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №129167
 08.06.2016
Margot: In the 90s, I worked for a guy who was on the workplace, giving up, beating himself in the chest and shouting, “That’s what I can respect myself for – I give people a job!” I just didn’t mention that the salary doesn’t give 😉

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №129166
 08.06.2016
I would still be sitting there if I hadn’t realized the weakness of being and hadn’t learned to be content with communicating with relatives, colleagues and porn sites.

And the porn sites understand us best.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №129165
 08.06.2016
xxx> why do you wear a carpet on your neck? Does it mean something?
yyy> This is a symbol of agnostics. We are ready to acknowledge the existence of God if it is proven. And as a sign of this we wear a carabin on which at any time you can hang a cross, Magenta, a moon or another symbol, depending on which doctrine will be true. But as long as there is no evidence, the carrier remains empty.
xxx> o_o
yyy> And if I’m serious, I’m holding on to the player. There are no pockets in the shirt.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №129164
 08.06.2016
Questions: 1) how do I protect myself from viewing those photos? 2) how do I develop this if that advertisement itself jumps onto my screen, as is often the case today?
by : :
He has told the world hundreds of times:
Use AdBlock, Luke!

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №129163
 08.06.2016
Looking at the number of stupid quotes, I begin to understand that diamond is a nickname, like Chapaev, Chukchi or an old Jew from Soviet anecdotes.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №129162
 08.06.2016
What is the support answer to the question, why is it that acheepens suffers?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №129161
 08.06.2016
Dear Brothers! Here's a list of literature for summer, and don't come here any more in search of meaning, it's not here! )))

Ruth Dixon "Now that you got me here, what will we do?"
"Range of peach" (it is also "Ananga Rank")
"Physiology of human sexual life or marriage under a microscope"

And then clean up in the house, wash your clothes, shave, wash and shave, dress decently, grab a sum of money for lunch in a café for two plus a taxi, get a good mood - and forward, walk into the city center, look for meaning!

Well, do not forget to edit this wisdom in 25 years and pass it on to next generations... ;)

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №129160
 07.06.2016
I really like the film "The Diamond Hand" and I often use phrases like "Semen Semenovich!".
We presented a new boss today. His name is Semen Semenovich.
I am afraid to crack something.

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