Over the years of watching series and movies about superheroes, I realized one thing – if a superhero has appeared in your city, it’s time to roll away.

The Moscovites are familiar with the bitter feeling when a gas-byter-plitter became the chief of a whole city.

I went to the barber and cut my hair short. In the evening, coming from work, the husband noticed, but said nothing. After a while, I listened to him talking in half a voice with our York dog:
You knew what she was going to do. Why did you let her go? Why didn’t you bite her leg?

Before I got married, I didn’t know you could put milk in the refrigerator incorrectly.

A real woman is obliged to give a man at his first request.
The Request? Should he still demand? Is the look not enough?

This is by chance not about those girls who after 35-40 begin to flirt at all with all in a row, in the shy hope that they will still marry?
· :
They hope for sex, sometimes quite persistently.

The 23-year-old British drug dealer Daniel Barker to police about the robbery after two unknown people fraudulently stole his cocaine.

Barker thus decided to punish the offenders, but not quite successful. When police asked if he still had cocaine, Barker honestly replied that he had it.

If it goes on, then until the end. One of my acquaintances, Imyarek Imyarekovich, recovered from the work of the court seven times. Eventually he fell asleep and died.

How many hands does a man have?
YYY: AAAA I know this mystery
How many parts of the body are named by hands
I am not caught in transphobia.

Vk A picture of the pigeon. and Anonymous.
And if it wasn’t anonymous, would the pigeons find the author and scratch him from foot to head?

Fuck, why did you get to the men? Absolutely all men in the world until a certain point are afraid of pregnant women and children, because they have not yet matured to responsibility for them.

Well, I suggest to "age of responsibility" to prohibit them (and women too) from fucking. And it is a pleasure to have all the towns, and to be responsible for it, all the little ones.

by Ablablaev:
But if you genetically raise an intelligent pig and that pig adopts Islam, will it be a haram or a halal?

by Voland48:
If a pig is really intelligent, then it will not be religious :)

If men were really concerned about the size of a member, they would have long ago invented breasts for a member.
XHH: With porous inserts.

This is:

Your mother, the gender chauvinists (both male and female), WHERE in the “resort novel” it was stated that “this is the ordinary female chauvinism.” For men, it is exactly the same.

And even worse, considering that the men vacationers much more often callously silence the presence of a wife, three children, a dog and two cats in their lives)))

On the part of men, it is especially disgusting to silence the presence of two cats.

In today’s quiet and detailed German, it is really difficult to distinguish the traits of his wild ancestors, for whom freedom was air, life, condition of existence.
In Germany, there is no need to worry about yourself: everything is done for you, and it is done well.
“Please, you are only born into the light of God,” the German chief said to the citizen, “and we will do the rest. The Germans are not worried.
Carlyle rightly acknowledged for the Prussians — and this applies to all Germans — one great virtue: the capacity to repair. Teach him to work and send him to Africa or Asia, under the leadership of someone wearing a shirt – and he will do whatever he wants, will meet at least the devil, if ordered.
The most surprising thing is that every person, who was a helpless being in himself, becomes energetic, clever, ingenious in them - only he will be shaped and made the boss over others. The German either obeyes or commands.
They have one motto: debt, and the concept of debt seems to be reduced to the following: blind obedience to anyone who wears brilliant buttons. Until now, Germany has had good luck with regents, it will have a difficult time when the main machine is ruined, but the character of the people described above is constantly preparing good rulers; this is quite likely.

1898 J.K. Jerome "Three on four wheels"

This is :

Normal men need sex.
without it, his romance with you.

A normal woman needs romance (a surprise - for every woman she is different), without it, she has your sex with you.

The schoolgirl:

It is so simple: competition. I explain on my fingers. If I, as a man, just want to fuck and I offer this to a girl, then I need to browse before this, flowers, cocktails, restaurants, smart conversations, choose the right one depending on the situation. Because the girl, if she wants to fuck, will smile temptingly and will have a huge choice.
I want to marry you, sorry, I don’t have to. Thirty years ago, it was proposed and hinted to be exactly ten times. And if a girl wants to get married, let her break up herself. Because I am choosing here.

She goes to bed with whoever she wants. Your flowers-restaurants-sweets do not play a role here. If you don’t like her at first, then at least break yourself up, and if you like her, it’s enough not to behave like a fool. Regarding marriage in general amused: there are such girls in a row - "choose me, bird of happiness tomorrow", and you walk so cool and appreciate yourself, lol. Go to the lessons, you will learn about relationships when you grow up.

in the market.

Is it genetically modified carrots?

Seller: No, but why are you asking?

Carrot: Yes, why are you asking?

Article: Parked in the courtyard of Krasnoyarsk Pokrovsky foreign market was poured with acid
The comments:
What is Lemon Acid?
Lemon: No, not my own.

I decided to wash the windows while there is a pause between the rainy hours. The windows go out to the courtyard to the children's playground, crawl bands, all things. The place is empty. At some point, I noticed that a guy landed on one of the benches with a large tourist backpack, a bunch of all kinds of carpets and other tourist tricks. He folds the lawn, cuts sandwiches, gets a thermos.

At this point, our guard approaches him (the house in the center of the city, with the railroad, the slugs and so on) and rubs something for a long time. The guy hurriedly collects things, folds the carpet, throws everything in the backpack. And why, I think, to chase the guy, because he did not drink alcohol, did not bother anyone, actually, sat quietly. I remember cases from my childhood when I tried to play with my brother in the private sector, and we were expelled every time by the same evil guards. I compassionately look at the trail of a man with a sandwich in his teeth.

And then the security guard takes a bag from the boy’s hands, brings it into his booth, sits down, puts a cupcake. As it turned out, the security guard did not ask him to leave, but offered to rest with him in a cellar, so that he did not wet if it rained again. I washed all the windows, and they were all sitting and talking. Then they shrugged each other’s hands and separated.

And I was ashamed to realize that by habit I mentally blamed a person, expecting bad things from him in advance. It is time to change the way of thinking, friends, because, as the saying goes, call a man a pig - and he cries.