bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №112649
 27.04.2015
In Mortal Kombat X at the beginning of the battle, there is a fun dialogue between Scorpion and Sub-Zero.
Scorpio: "Everyone skips these anyway."
Sab-Ziro: "I love you"
Scorpio: "I know."

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №112648
 27.04.2015
Who eats a pack of peelings
He will get... a watermelon!! to
Tired of!! to
Where do sent and received quotes go?
Two days I see the same shit around the circle.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №112647
 27.04.2015
Who is "Chess and Mat"? Those who from the very beginning wrote that the authorities finally off-laminated and can no longer come up with who and for what to cause the scandalous case, finally saw a sad confirmation. There will be no hooligans who have decided to fail to pray to the Mother of God and for this instead of just fifteen jokes that have ripped two years of noise and demands of public burning, so back and forth and to the dance at a closed performance, or the color of bee costumes is somewhat suspicious, and now to a situation where Nothing is inappropriate, nor really erotic can be crossed - we stick anyway.

Tomorrow they will turn your own daughter on the street, because in the spring she will wear a yellow coat and blue jeans, and the consciousness of the mental wicked will consider this to be the propaganda of the Ukrainian flag.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №112646
 27.04.2015
I went to the store to buy a deodorant. The headquarters is pop. Buying a perfume. The price is indicated on the box: 666r.
Father: "Besovskaya price to..."
"This is not what we invented."
Father: "Devils, their mother... Can you spray hot on the ruble that, and?..."

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №112645
 27.04.2015
If a person matures after unsuccessful attempts to twist something, then this person is clearly unprofessional.
But your owner would try to twist off the knee shaft a year after some abricks planted it on an anti-vibration seal along the entire length of the scissor. We drank the skyscraper. And a goose. After curling the engine (V6 3.2 l) on the table from the effort under the collar length of 1.6 meters.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №112644
 27.04.2015
US Defense Ministry: Russian hackers hacked into Pentagon systems
The Russians are so regularly breaking the Pentagon that the idea arises involuntarily: do we need a nuclear shield? Per we should use Pindosky?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №112643
 26.04.2015
My son spends a lot of time at the computer.
My husband accused me of not getting away from the TV.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №112642
 26.04.2015
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
YYU: Yes, you are not okay with the punctuation.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №112641
 26.04.2015
fff: Here they will ask me:" You probably painted grass in the army?"
FFF: And I would proudly answer: "No. I did not suffer such a hernia. I painted the moss."

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №112640
 26.04.2015
xxx: I decided to shoot an electric car driver a cigarette and heard him talking to a cleaner, such as about the cancellation of trains. It turned out that they were driving attention... by Yandex electric cars!!! to

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №112639
 26.04.2015
The Pearl Collection:

You are positioning yourself as a sympathy in the forehead.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №112638
 26.04.2015
Greek girl: I wanted to send the author in the ass, and he has already been sent. What to do now?

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №112637
 26.04.2015
The goldfish? Thirty-three years, the man could not make the grandmother cuddle, he waited for everything until it was done.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №112636
 26.04.2015
Xenia: Favorite grandmother’s game: "Guess why I’m offended by you. And to be even more interesting, I’m not talking to you".

I hate this game. I immediately leave her.

Xenia: I can’t play it. Because I cannot not talk.

by Ugo. Your favorite game: Find out why I’ve offended you, listen to it a hundred times, understand how little you are, how I hate you, and it would be better if we never met.

c) Gurzillla

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №112635
 26.04.2015
From the discussion of protection from outsider forces:
Andrew Mad: By the way, if there are no silver bullets, then you can use false means. For example, include a louder B. Moiseev. The singing of the cock drives out the unclean.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №112634
 26.04.2015
Yes girl, not for nothing. I will pay money. Every year for rubles. Think of yourself. A hundred years is a hundred rubles. You will become rich!

This is from the fairy tale "How pop hired a worker". As practice shows, since then, the principle of the formation of wages in Russia has virtually not changed. and sad.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №112633
 26.04.2015
The xxx:
Three lives will take a man.
The xxx:
Chief of Finance Management and their Laboratory
YYYY :
A well-planned financial plan
The xxx:
Because the night is dark and full of hungry students

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №112632
 26.04.2015
It was in Peter on the day of the eclipse. I woke up late that day, and when I went to my business, I couldn’t understand what eclipse everyone was talking about. In the subway after me in the car entered a guy with a girl of both ages about 1-2 course, I hear that they talk about an unknown eclipse again. The girl explains to the guy the reasons for this phenomenon: Panimayaesh, the sun and the moon revolve around our world... I turned around to capture in memory the face of the one who so easily turns in the tombs of Galileo and Copernicus.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №112631
 26.04.2015
About the Saturday:
K: As if the current power did not overthrow the Bolsheviks, but they could not give up such a chaos, invented by them.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №112630
 26.04.2015
It is very plausible:
— — —
If you think of something plausible, we have 3 billion this week. "unnecessary" conditional term was given, and you write about 15 years to two minors for a small theft.
— — —
In our country, half the contingent is sitting "for a bag of potatoes" in all strictness, and the second half of the contingent is mashed from some serious punishment for really heavy things. Well, on conditional for 3 yards - there is nothing to say.
The only thing - the author of the book is clearly a supporter of the draconian measures: "for all - death"

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna