bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №95267
 14.03.2014
I remembered when I once accompanied my wife (then just a girl) home. It was the second or third date, well, I relaxed and at the entrance I applied all my skills to kiss her beautifully and gently. And here we kiss and kiss (for 2 minutes), she raises my eyes and says:
very little.
Oh, and a little?! to
She is little...known.

We have lived since then.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №95266
 14.03.2014
I asked in the store for the password from wifay.
I got the answer "from one to zero".
This is my technical education and it did its job.
Smash something? With what step? I even asked by surprise.
Then after nine...

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №95265
 14.03.2014
Aeleonov: My cat immediately catches, kills and eats flowers in my house. Cut and in pots. I decided "aga!" and bought the cactus, choosing the most cozy. He just caught them and killed them, rolling them out of the pots to the floor. There was not.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №95264
 14.03.2014
Simple advice for buyers of surprise rings. In the absence of a friend, sample any of her constant rings, remember which finger and to what point it is stretched and step into the jewelry. In 20 years of marriage, he has never failed.
By the way, before a bunch, in some offices, the profession of seed collector is called BYCHAR :)).

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №95263
 14.03.2014
In the center of Kiev, about 40 people in masks and with guns in their hands tried to seize a bank.
It was a peaceful rally at the pitch of the hryvnia.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95262
 14.03.2014
Well, admit, who subjugated Vladimir Wolfych to get everyone away from Ukraine and start discussing the letter "Y"?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №95261
 14.03.2014
I hate the U.S. government and its policies, but I write about it on U.S. Facebook from a computer assembled from American components.
-----------
From Chinese, from Chinese

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №95260
 14.03.2014
I add :
"On the inscriptions in the toilet:
...the most delightful thing I’ve seen is that in the MAI community, all the walls and doors of the cabin were glued with headings from the “truth” and the local “propeller.”
*********************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************
The daughter said that they have thematic toilets in the school, which occupies several buildings. for fans of anime and for fans of Harry Potter with corresponding inscriptions and pictures. and dark unrepaired basement toilet for ready)))))

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №95259
 13.03.2014
Dihydrogen monoxide is...
Our accountant really liked the tea in the dining room, and then she was told that it was so delicious because there is glucopiranosil added. Now she has got an electric tea machine and carries her tea and sugar to work.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №95258
 13.03.2014
XX: In every thing in the world there is an outcome. In Lamborghini, for example, it was difficult for pedals to press with valens.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №95257
 13.03.2014
Alice jokes with the cats:
What kind of mimics we are, how beautiful we are, what kind of legs we have, what kind of nose, what kind of eyes we have, our eyes have not changed color, our eyes are still milky.
And, a little silent, with the same whispering voice:
Then these eyes will fall out and grow root.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95256
 13.03.2014
It is so funny to read this after the graduation experience, where parents poured all kinds of ethanol solutions into their own children with their own hands. Cats are worse than their children, of course.
and...
Oh, they held the children behind their heads and poured enti solutions into their throats. The children resisted, resisted.
Cats (chickens, adult dogs with cats, fish, straws and other hamsters) are undoubtedly more miserable than Homo sapiens. Because they are speechless creatures, and every sadist and/or fool with his whole head does what his imagination tells him.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №95255
 13.03.2014
Melany (16:04:36 13/03/2014)
I would have a bag and a stylist for 1 day.

Fatamorgana (16:04:52 13/03/2014)
I have three and a stylist.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95254
 13.03.2014
This is:

_iv >> By the way, I read an interesting article on the subject, and what would happen if there was copper instead of iron in hemoglobin?
It turned out: 1. The blood would be blue. 2nd For the normal functioning of this blood, a sufficiently high level of alcohol in the blood is required. Three It starts working normally at pressures below those that are about a kilometer above sea level :-)
It turns out the direct Greek pantheon - the blood is blue, live in the mountains, constantly drink :-)

Azimova "Pasteet from goose baking cake" read, there is even more interesting

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №95253
 13.03.2014
Keda: Crimean students will receive certificates of the Russian sample and will be accepted for training without interview entrance tests. According to Viktor Oganesyan, the Ministry of Education of Russia promised that even graduates who did not finish school with the best certificates will be accepted in higher education institutions.

We have very few idiots.

Asphalt by NDA. After 6 years: "Well, what a specialist you are, bleat, hands out of your ass! Are you born in Crimea?"

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95252
 13.03.2014
xxx: the secretary asks "and if you cut a member it will be shorter, yeah"
I say no, only the skin is cut.
Is she so surprised "daaaa? But I thought they would be circumcised so that they would fit into a girl, and so that they would not grow as much as a tail is cut off to dogs.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №95251
 13.03.2014
Loaded :

Tagged: fucking
hitty: put me, PR stick, in open space with a few coders
No one smokes, no one drinks coffee, no one talks to, no one is silent.
Hitty: and only occasionally hear the outcry "Yes!"

The voice of an office plankton that suddenly hit where people work. It does not burn, it feels proud.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №95250
 13.03.2014
Alexis
by 15:38
Let us drink beer, vodka.
by 15:39
Go to

Yulia
by 15:39
I do not drink

Alexis
by 15:40
Absolutely ideal
by 15:40
Or I have no money.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №95249
 13.03.2014
XXX is such a joke!
xxx: in the phone the limit on the length of the name in the body book - now I have new fashion friends: Timor Roberto and Tatiana Alex..
Who is from Latin America
YYY: And the transvestite!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №95248
 13.03.2014
AAA: Well, some are also a drug.
XXX: What an interesting word!
and necotine!

You can see a warm stove, fireplace, and cats with cats around.
On all furniture items, on the floor, and even on the darkened from time bars under the ceiling - puffy murmuring animals!
And a family doctor (not a doctor, a doctor is from a children's clinic, namely a family doctor, an old man, in glasses and with touching spirals from under a white hat with a red cross, like Aybolit at Suteev), with a tube-stethoscope, a little thinking, says: Yes, batenka, evon like you catophilia-something cut, yes-s... Try to drink a week of NECOTIN, the recipe I will write out now. Do not start, in any case do not start. They don’t joke about it.

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