bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №92607
 17.01.2014
I use Google Maps. It shows my location:
"The United States of America
Not here now? Repairs to"
Fix this annoying mistake, Google, move me to the United States!

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №92606
 17.01.2014
>I wear my upper clothes.
Cat: It’s wet and smells of me, wow

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №92605
 17.01.2014
Comics and EGE finally rejected the ability to read texts in which there is a link, plot and unlink. Now it is desirable that only one link remains in the text. Best with one paragraph. Anna Karenina was caught under the train. The photo. The point.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №92604
 17.01.2014
to this:
If a girl sleeps with three guys the night before the exam, she gets three. If four, then four. If it’s five, it’s a great rating. At first I didn’t believe it, and then I decided. It turned out to work. It’s already three sessions for one five..."
_____
I apologize, but should I do it simultaneously or in a row?
If it is not enough, then it will be useful.)

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №92603
 17.01.2014
XXX: Rumor, you don’t have any interesting program... for something?

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №92602
 17.01.2014
...held on the client’s compile WoT,...
Even the book "One Hundred Great battles" offered.
XXX: The Next

Oh, where is the continuation? Did he not write and he killed you?

[ + 22 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №92601
 17.01.2014
In the topic of "old age" some: I am 20 years old, I still have somewhere stored 5 discos, I listened to vinyl discs and watched diaphylms on the diaprojektor. I remember the time when the cell phone appeared and gained popularity. I remember the OS system or how there... Windows 98 and big computers. And I know the word servant - still my grandmother stands! I understand that you are just old trolls that have overwhelmed the internet, but don’t underestimate our generation.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №92600
 17.01.2014
C of Habra:

So, what is needed to implement an ERP system in the company? Well, first of all, your toilets should be clean. The state of toilets is the state of the company as a whole. You will laugh, but it is. If the toilets are dirty, then first you need to solve system problems in the company, and then you can take an ERP.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №92599
 16.01.2014
My favorite is a sweet cat. There is a rabbit in the farm.

At the zoo shop, I am standing at the rabbit feed, I am taking pictures on my cell phone. The Seller:
What will you do?! to
Without a back-thinking, without breaking away from the process:
I send the cat’s rabbit food to Votsap for arrangement.
The seller was demoralized for a long time.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №92598
 16.01.2014
X: Skype is threatening me
Y: In what way?
X: I want to install it, but he writes not long left

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №92597
 16.01.2014
correctly so:
"No rule without exceptions" is the only rule without exceptions. It is also an exception to the same rule.

[ + 38 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №92596
 16.01.2014
and Alexander:
I became an uncle!! to
and Alexei:
and was?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №92595
 16.01.2014
Time is flying. Are there any former fiddles here?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №92594
 16.01.2014
You’ve been snoring all night again.
I didn’t sneeze, I was sneezing ;)

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №92593
 16.01.2014
Why are mothers always trying to feed their children to death?

"Well, look, she took you on her arms at the nursery: three-five hundred kge, half a meter tall - and since then she has learned firmly that the child should grow well. On the doorstep with a pencil of centimeters marked, watched to eat well, gain weight... In twenty years everything was normal, and here heraks - the child suddenly stopped growing, aaa, panic! The subconscious gives a signal: feed urgently! Feeding even more! Logic, the child must grow up!


[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №92592
 16.01.2014
Admins received a whisper.
The general calls and says:
Why does the computer help the secretary to repair the expeditor? What are you doing there at all?
Admines in a... shock, call the secretary, ask what’s going on.
I didn’t have my computer on since morning. Danny and I tried to turn it on.
Why didn’t you call us???? to
So you tell me to overload the computer! How can I overload it if it doesn’t turn on me!!! to
–...

The curtain.

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №92591
 16.01.2014
K: And why did Tolkien not write a book about trolls? Wouldn’t it be fun to see how the Hollywoods make a brutal green-skinned pair of fabulous mimics? Gnomes is simple.
H: Well, it’s simple, because with Snow White in the head, that gnome is a cute, hard-working shortcut, a rookie in a hood, an ornament of a lawn. And not a armored greedy mountain devil with an explosive character and a steel kiwi.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №92590
 16.01.2014
A cabinet in the office, three computers, one network printer that doesn’t work. Two techniques for each other:
- You need to repair the oven and out there (pointing to the remote computer) to put wood!
Sitting next to a woman kilogram under a hundred:
You killed the cockroaches! Should I repair the printer or not?

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №92589
 16.01.2014
***: fame very wanted in the movie on somewhere there ronin
***: here "47" is harder to remember than "roninov")))

[ + 39 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №92588
 16.01.2014
News from a well-known website:

Deputy Elbrus Tadeev proposes to prohibit naming children in honor of geographical objects.

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