bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №71166
 07.10.2012
Comments on the article "8 facts about asteroids":

...
Is it from them that the muscles grow? And how do they get them then?

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №71165
 07.10.2012
<Petya_Bamper> Who are you studying for?
<Gelja.> jurisprudence))
<Petya_Bamper> and your husband or boyfriend?
<Gelja.> The Economist
<maliNka_> straight like Bonnie and Clyde))
<Petya_Bamper> one robs the people, and the other smears them

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71164
 07.10.2012
XXX: I don’t think I should make movies.
The mysteries of our planet. not yet
Prove that Nessie exists, or it’s just
This is a joke from the Middle Ages.
In the movie, they are already firmly convinced and try.
to convince us.
b412: Would you know for how many years I want to ask such a question to the heads of all religions?

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №71163
 07.10.2012
XXX is all. I delivered the project! I have only two dreams!
YYY :?? to
XXX: The First Maybach
And the second one?
XXX: Punch in a bowl of flour and see how it flies :)

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №71162
 07.10.2012
She: Now my mood is broken.
You eat a cookie.
It does not help.
What if there are two cookies?
Yes, at least a hundred
He says, “You are a wretch.
See also: Ham

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №71161
 07.10.2012
From woman.ru :
"Is it true that cats have either a single or an uneven number of kittens always born?"

Of course it is true! ?

by REI

[ + 25 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71160
 07.10.2012
From Habr:
Hackers hacked a satellite and wrote bad words on the sky all night.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №71159
 07.10.2012
The situation: the girl explained to the guy that they can and will not meet again. The guy, in turn, listened carefully and clearly picked up arguments to convince the lady of the heart that their relationship could still make a profit. Unfortunately, he did not start his speech at all:
Is it because I am Balzac?
The woman answered quietly and firmly:
No, it’s because you’re a fool.

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71158
 07.10.2012
Melatonin
Advertising in Cyprus

Melatonin
This is Piper.

Melatonin
The body of Sergey Bodrov was found! The discovery shocked archaeologists. [20] and [20]

Melatonin
archaeologists

Melatonin
Astronomers were also in the area.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №71157
 07.10.2012
You do not understand that! You have no eggs.
I have brains and breasts. I will always have eggs.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №71156
 07.10.2012
Three years as I retired from the army, and I still don't understand why a bald soldier is scratched?? to

Shred the shirt and the door of the shell - so that the fur lies straight and uniform :R

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №71155
 07.10.2012
Once in the garage looking for something, I accidentally saw a box from the signal "starline" - I open - there is a barrel, the second which. Oh, let me think I will take it with me, maybe anyone will need it, it can be written on any signal from this series. He threw me into a mess and forgot. A week has passed, today I go, in October is my former car, which I sold for a year and a half. And I remember that it was on her too (at the time) I put a starline with a car-start. I slowed down, got a slide - tried - a spark, opens)) I pick up the phone of the buyer (I think I will give it, it will be useful), and he drops and drops. Very busy to see.
I pulled it off the button, let it warm up. And he will go out of work (just lunch) and sit in the heat. No, he doesn’t take the phone!

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №71154
 07.10.2012
I was looking for a torrent that I didn't get - the sides left. Added a tracker on which there should be sides - 0 by phase. I think I should check out another combo. Maybe a dumb client doesn't cheer I do everything on a stationary... and here how speed stopped! and 40 megabits. I have never seen this in my life! And then, fucking, I looked at the yield on the note... at 40 megabits.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №71153
 07.10.2012
No, well, Russian language, of course, can be very cowardly and cowardly.
But, fucking, the design:"My rabbit, my cat, my fish is sweet, go eat, the crocodile crocodile" is overwhelming.
The cat agrees with me.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №71152
 07.10.2012
There is an opinion why the Japanese are ahead of the planet in the creation and development of new technologies (robots, computers, etc.)
I spent the weekend with my son. Together, they watched Japanese cartoons - anime about MEGO - schoolchildren, in which children are already straight from childhood are unbiasedly strong and can punish everything and everyone.
So if I had seen such cartoons from a young age, but Neherova would have been so upset to find out that I can't. (This is also the case with the child)
After watching the cartoons he goes out and with his friends tries to repeat what he saw there. Coming home with eyes full of disappointment, he sits down for the study of smart books and bubbles under his nose that when he grows up there will be a costume like Iron Man and will become stronger.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №71151
 07.10.2012
In my opinion, Apple’s finest trolling was from Google, who named the first version of Android Apple Pie (Apple Pie).

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71150
 07.10.2012
My father told. I went by car from St. Petersburg to Moscow. At the exit from Gatchina at the intersection was equal to the car, black tinted nine, all in the latest fashion, on the rear side glass the inscription: "If life and reason are on your way, stay away from the torpedoes"... Half-road, he says, feverishly recalled where on the way should be the torpedoes.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №71149
 07.10.2012
From the Kuwait website:
Ten years is a strange period. Someone feels, and did not notice, work, family... and who will turn from a 10-year-old boy into a 20-year-old man. And these men think that Masyanya is from childhood. :) Prikol.."

How right he is.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №71148
 07.10.2012
No one knows how the series ended.
After he killed the latter and became immortal, the court sentenced him to life in prison for premeditated murder.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №71147
 07.10.2012
From the news:
"In the Novgorod region, a spice processing plant is burning."
The smell is mm.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna