My 5 year old son decided to shave me and my wife. The hair.
What are you, hairdresser?
The Son: Yes, Mom
Wife is a beast?
No, no people.

What should I do to not write like a joke?

The connection between intelligence and wealth has not even been proven.
by Perelman.

What the President wanted best...
We have a type office and a sports complex across the road. Good one, with a pool and courts - tennis and badminton. Well, we went all over the office volancher to leave for the lunch break. And the local staff is happy to us - the people at lunch still no one, so we for the price and allowed with gratitude.
And well - and ladies and men, bosses and subordinates with rackets, in pairs and individually. No need to recruit a team, everyone can play - complete convenience and democracy. Then take a shower and go back to work.
But after all, Dmitry Anatolyevich fell asleep playing badminton on the combinations! The enthusiasm died. At first, the people, embarrassed, began to hide the racket in the bags, then to forget, and the chief accountant so and so proclaimed: "As I take the racket in my hands, I immediately think of a party of scammers and thieves. Play without me.” Eventually the enthusiasm died.
Thank you very much, Dmitry Anatolievich. This game has been played with his participation.

The Young Leader:
I and my colleagues will perform in front of a 10,000 audience. As you wish,
But he must provide great ovations after the speech. Or you s
Work is thrown.
The singers are sitting on stage. Quiet in the room. The leader comes out and points out to the speakers:
They are fraudsters and thieves.
The room breaks up in crazy applause.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
A radius of about 6-7 km.
What to use as a base station? What to use with the subscriber?

yyyy - 10 boxes of vodka will easily cover a small village. As a base station you can choose any liquor and vodka store.

SMS:"Dear, I’ve made some smoothies here. Buy a cupcake for every occasion"

I like clever advertisers, sometimes they come up with this, you wonder. In our city there is a sanitary store, in a row with which their banner on which advertising periodically changes. So, once they had one, a toilet was painted and the inscription "Morning does not start with coffee", but quite recently such a kind of ancient statue, where the uncle sits in a position with his elbow in his knee and supports his head with his fist, the same row painted the toilet and the inscription "Tolk for reflection."

I was told by a girlfriend here that the girlfriends are monthly adjusted to each other. So if one starts at the beginning of the month, then the rest are about the same.
O O O O O O
xxxh: now found the correct answer to the question:"do they all have monthly?and "

Only cultural and educated girls know that "not in the mouth" is written fuzzy.

Eternal
I always wanted to be the first girl :)

kOksik (12:28:48 16/11/2011)
in the modern world for this article))

xxxx
Can you stay overnight?? to
xxxx
VPS is not in that window.
UUU
This is how hopes move.

Lenka: today the whole department smelled the contract, brought from the restaurant, really smelled very delicious... signed, not even reading :D

MarkII: 2 oranges are perfect for lunch. I am serious.
2 oranges of meat.

A group of humorists. I bought yellow jeans came to the universe, after the first couple went to the buffet and on the second a little late, I go down and say - "you can sit down", so the whole group stands up and together with the basement do a half-worship, and the choir "KU"

XX: Why does Marsik (cat) so hate the crocodile? No one ever beat him or even frightened him.
XY: This is the memory of our ancestors.)

from ZH:

"I worked out yesterday. Guys from Sverdlovsk asked to help, to deduct a PDF booklet for citizens. Everything is useful.
"Not a question, - I agreed, - send the version". Fortunately, the work is not dusty.
have sent. I deducted. Repair the prints. sent him back. "Well, they say, we are sending in the printing already".
And here I feel like something is shaking. "Well, I say, guys, let me see you again quickly".
I guessed. I have looked. And surely!

I thought it was only in books about classical printing.

In the title "Rules of Behavior in Places of Mass Stay of People", in the word "stay" - instead of the letter "r" suddenly formed the letter "o".

Fixed, wiped out a cold sweat.
The booklet barely played with new colors!"

I am lying there, I cannot sleep. I think "So if I don’t sleep now, I’ll go clean"
Cut off in five seconds. I am a fucking housewife.

Alex: Do you know why the images from different Mars ships come so differently? Because some are filming Lucas, others are Spielberg.

In the molecule drawing program, if you try to draw more than seven bonds to a coal, the message appears: "Do you try to draw a coal?"