I take a taxi from Birobijan to Khabarovsk.
The taxi driver of Biobidjan, sociable, says he is storming. I object to:
- Rather, kerim (Russian metys with storms, now this word is forgotten)
My mother is Russian.
Do you know any Jews? I ask.
There is...
Who is?
The testimony is Jewish.
I thought: And a Jewish aunt...
And the wife?! to
And my wife too...
And the children?
The children are Russians.
Are they living with you?
In Israel...

“Mom, where is Dad going?
“Oh, son, our dad has a wacht in Russia, he makes money. My dad works in the state. But don’t worry, he will work and come back to us! Home to London.

For a year and a half full-time freelance for 15-20 hours a day (sometimes two days in a row I work, then a day off sleep) was filled with funny situations. For example, I did not drive a car last winter. After NG went out once to dig it out of the snow, because the car already almost looked like a patan priora, lowered to zero. I often forget what my wife said, a second after the conversation, because the writers will write and perform.

Apophysis occurred this summer. I’ve been sitting behind the compass for more than 30 hours. A woman wakes up in the morning. Her first phrase: "Say you didn't eat from a dog dish at night." And I have a dog’s bowl on the table, and a spoonful runs out of it. My wife washed the dishes with her dog’s dish. I went out in the night to look for boob-eat, took the first "table" from a bunch of washed dishes, sprinkled the strawberries there and, apparently, ignorantly ate xD

People love someone else’s dirty clothes so much because they are not too clean.

There are many legends and stories about the hockey confrontation of Canadian professionals and "amateurs" from the USSR national team. Someone will be interesting. Canada Cup of 1981. In the preliminary stage, the Canadians thundered us 7:3, apparently in memory of 1972. The next meeting is in the final. Before that, Mike Bossi (the surname of his grandfather Bosy) and twenty-year-old Wayne Gretzky (the grandfather was called Terence Gretzky) made what they wanted - 13 goals in six matches. The team's final was led by the winning coach Scotty Bowmen and Victor Tychonov. I think the bookmakers warm their hands well. Our team won 8-1 and nobody was able to bet on them.
After the end of the final match in the dressing room of the Soviet team accompanied by the police entered the main organizer of the tournament, the executive director of the association of players of the NHL Alan Eagles and selected minutes earlier solemnly awarded to the winners the main prize - a huge cup of expensive nickel alloy in the form of half a clay sheet. Iglson explained his actions as follows: "The cup belongs to the Government of Canada, and its place in the Hall of Fame." Previously, the organizers did not announce that the main prize is immutable. This act has caused confusion among Canadian fans. One of them, Winnipeg entrepreneur George Smith, launched a fundraising campaign to create a copy of the trophy. After collecting several thousand dollars, a copy of the Canada Cup was made, later handed over through the Soviet embassy to Moscow and handed over to the CCCP.

After watching advertisements on TV for a day, it was sad for Maxim Galkin...
He lives on credit, charges on AliExpress, holds his wife and children on cash.

I am going to Pskov. Join the Union Press:

Please give me a map of Pskov.

Do you find the cheapest?

Take the cheapest.

Later, I tried to use the map to orient the area and not

could.

I was sold a souvenir card of Pskov of the 19th century.

The more convincing your arguments in a dispute with a woman, the more likely she will understand you and the less likely she will agree with you.

It was a long time, a month or two before I was born. My parents were on a trolley bus to work. When they entered, my mother stuck in the passage - I had to be careful and walk quietly. Dad went to the salon faster, sat down on the remaining seat and called her. When Mom came, Dad gave her a seat. Nearby was a mouthpiece. Hearing that his father invited his mother to sit down, he moved the pregnant woman with his back, pushed her away and splashed into the only free seat from which he stood up. My mother was in a hurry and tried to tell him something. Jolob smiled, stared at his parents and hiccalled disgustingly.

The father reacted furiously. He did not start to shame him, to anger him, not to beat him. He pulled off his gorgeous fur hat from the wretch and threw it out through the door of the trolleybus right into a deep pit at the stop. The man cried out, “You... Etta?” The bullet flew out to catch the hat. His father gave him the acceleration with a pinch under his ass. The trolleybus driver, who, apparently, watched what was happening in the cabin in the mirror, closed the door and not rushed away. The man with a wet hat in his hands tried to catch up with the trolleybus, slapping the cloth and shaking the butt, but the driver did not stop. My mother sat down and safely arrived at the subway.

Once Mr. Peskov opened our eyes to the fact that the unimportant life of the people in Russia is the result of two world wars. Judging only by the hours for 500 thousand euros, both wars were very even beneficial to Peskov himself.

When I was lost, I was not five or ten, but thirty-five, and it happened like this:



On the weekend, as usual, my husband and I went to a large shopping center to shop for food in Ashan. The shopping center was a building in the form of a podkova with a car park in the middle. When we entered the "podkova", I remembered that I needed to buy pet food.

“Slow down here, I’ll buy Vanke’s food, and we’ll meet in Ashan.” I burned up, jumped out of the car, shut the door and ran toward the zoo store, where they sold food for our dog (there is no such thing in Ashan). And the husband went further, to the other end of the "podkova".

On the box in the store found a not pleasant thing - I left a card at home. This is Growth! But in the wallet found a pair of banknotes, it was enough for a pack of food and two toys, the delivery - two rubles. I went out of the store, wanted to call... There was no phone in the bag, in my pockets too. Where did I see him last time? In the car! I held it in my arms and then put it on my knees...What a day!

And then I cooled off from the realization: I don’t have my phone with me, money too, I’m far from home, where my husband is now and where our car – I don’t know.



Relax and no panic! You can ask someone for a phone, but now there are so many scammers, no, sooner or later, of course, someone will pity, but we still postpone it to the extreme. So what else?  Running through a huge, crowded store, hoping to encounter a spouse is not an option. At the box there are sixty. Watching her husband out of the store? But they are two on the ground, another on the underground parking lot and one in the TC. Find my car and wait there. We have such an average sedan, black color. How many are there such? One hundred or two hundred? And there are two levels of underground parking, the husband could also go there. Will he find me in the car?

I can go home – there is a computer, I can write, I can call my husband so that he doesn’t look for me and go home. There is no money for the route. And what, to get along?! to

“Country people, give money on the way home, I was in trouble, I lost my husband (and my car).”

Going on foot? A few kilometers to go, an hour and a half or two I will get, the weather is dirty and the road too, but you can catch a trick. No, this is all nonsense! Try to get in touch with your husband. Appeal to the CCS?



Here I am stupid! Announcements on loud communication in Ashan!!! How many times have I heard: “Seryeža Ivanov is waiting for her mom at the first box office. Olya Petrova, your mother is waiting for you at the first box.”

I ran to the information station.

Where can I send an announcement that a person is missing?

Hi here here. Who is lost to you? A woman answered because of the stand.

I lost my husband, no. I am lost!

The woman looked at me with a very surprised look.

And I began to explain to her, confusingly, what happened to me, and that now I have neither phone nor money (only a pack of horny food and two balls), that I do not know where my husband is, that is, I know he is somewhere in Ashan right now.

“Girl, the thing is that we only give high-speed ads about incapable people: young children, elderly people with dementia. You do not fall into any of these categories. - the employee of the store answered me and at the same time looked so that it became clear to me, in my capacity she still doubts.

And what should I do now? I made a complaint voice.

The woman said, “Do you remember your husband’s phone?” I actively shrugged my head. She gave me a phone call: “Thank God! “Call me...”

I have a scary appearance and women are afraid of me. Those who are not afraid, I am afraid.

Something time was constantly lacking. I suspect there was a leak somewhere.

I live in a small private house in the village. Only 2 thousand people. I have a dog, an ordinary dog. Very kind and kind dog. He likes to run out and give foot to passers, especially children. But there is one but! He is a thief. He carries everything into his yard. From dishes and waters, and clothes to tools. One day, he put on a almost new screwdriver. So we have a group in Watsapp where I post a photo of what he stole. Almost all residents belong to this group. Almost everyone was hurt.

The word of a new convocation was elected. There were urks in the Duma, shuleraya...

xxx: And you have a movie that impressed you very much many years ago, and now having revised it, you have very doubted its masterpiece and you have a question, what could I like in it before?)



Yyy: I won’t say about movies, I usually do that with men.

You’re fired by a stuntless programmer who overthrew everything that could be overthrew.

Solomon’s decision is to hire a well-known company on the market to complete his product.

The company assures that the best managers and developers in your sector will work with you.

The project begins. My first meeting with Timothy. In the role of a super-popper timid, your fired programmer sits down with a cup of coffee and says:

Oh well hi.

Modern signs



A true sign of the end of the elections, the statement of the first deputy chairman of the Central Bank of Sweden, that it is too late to help pensioners.



© Dmitry Sviridov

Shark

Once in the USSR, I spent almost three summer months on an expedition in the steppes of Kyrgyzstan. There I had a little puppy.

Members of the expedition: drillers and geodesists, lived in square bresent soldier tents. We slept on iron soldiers' beds with springs in cotton sleeping bags with valves and with clamps-tailers-trees.

Workers were soldiers of the building in the number of ten people with a senior headed. They lived in a large ten-bed tent that even had windows. In case of bad weather, there was a stove in the tent. Every morning after breakfast, the people in two trucks traveled around the steppe. They were engaged in drilling wells, filming the terrain, and only by evening everyone was finally gathered in the tent camp. And so every day.

The puppy

Since we had two cars (GAZ-51 and ZIL-130), the people could afford on Saturday or Sunday to go to the nearest village to a club, where you could watch a movie, and then stay to dance. Our soldiers were especially pleased with this event.

And here, on one of the weekends, the desired people went by car to the village, and I went with a wheelchair to the arak, where the karashi were conducted. It was already dark when our travellers returned. In the hands of one of the soldiers, I saw a soldier’s panama, from which something white and eary came out. It turned out to be a cute little, white but dirty puppy.

It turned out that the puppy was asked by a hostess for me on the condition that it would be returned at the end of the summer. The puppy was dirty and flea, but we washed it with shampoo and it became clean and white. The fleas themselves died from this shampoo.

Sharrik

There was a thin puppy, but we put him on pleasure, and in a few days he wore off on a soldier’s sausage and canned so that he became like a round white ball. I called him Ball. Ballick turned out to be a good companion who painted the uniformity of the days, as well as a good guard who driven away from my tent all the vitality.

One day I heard his swirling loud voice near the entrance to the tent. I approach and see that it is he lying on the snake, jumping back every time the snake begins to whisper and try to bite him. I had to say the serpent kiss, and she stumbled. Shrek slept with me. Since the nights were cold, he walked up to me in the sleeping bag, and out there was only his black nose.

The summer season is over. It is time to go home. Over the summer, Shark grew up and no longer looked like a little puppy. As we did not make friends with him, I could not take him with me, I had to return him to his mistress.

Legs on Shoulders

So it happened that a few years later I got to the same village where we went to the club in the summer and from where I got the puppy Sharik. I walked around the village with my backpack, heading to the car, which was waiting for me on the outskirts, as I suddenly saw that from the nearest courtyard to me from all the feet carries a large dog. I only had time to think, “Well, all, the writer,” and she sticks my legs on my shoulders and begins to lick my face...

Ramzan Kadyrov won 99.7% of the votes. Who are those 0.3% of desperate brave people?! to