bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №134381
 05.10.2016
"Buy cowards, in such trousers will run for you men with their yachts, exclusively!" (although men with their yachts usually walk with a stick, not run), "Unique Japanese cosmetics for the left hemisphere - but it is known that people are judged by it, here is a study of scientists". "Upgrade your washing machine urgently - or will you, like a villager, wash without Full Ionization?" ( * - is not ionization and is not complete, is a patented letter combination).

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №134380
 05.10.2016
Read today news: "CSKA has entered into an agreement with a company that produces validol"

This is all you need to know about Russian sports today.

@TsarNsK

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №134379
 05.10.2016
Wraithalex: Today, my daughter offered Santa to ask for a larger salary under the tree. I thought. Maybe if we write the whole country, then the economy of the country will be repaired.) No more to wait for)

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №134378
 05.10.2016
That’s what he did – he left his outstretched wife.
What? Shouldn’t it be then? And when? Vanguay, you will criticize any action of the hero of that story. I married that great woman - a fool (I't marry - especially a fool)))
I left her a fool!! (Wouldn’t he go away, again fool) Isn’t it?
///////////
The most funny thing is that in the quote from which you pulled out and apparently read only one of those sentences was written that he had to do so as not to be a fool. And that is one thing. Don’t water your ex-wife with shit and don’t blame her for a ruined life. Because the adult has chosen it himself. At least read what you answer.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №134377
 05.10.2016
From OpenNet:

xxx: funny, 10 minutes ago searched for the release date 5.8 and it came out :D
YYY : Hm Would you like to find the release date for Half Life 3?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №134376
 05.10.2016
When I was bathing as a child and my mother was lazy or had no time to sit there with me, she left the door open and asked me to sing loudly to know that I wasn’t drowning.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №134375
 05.10.2016
He was not born to kiss his ex-wife. And she has complaints about why she gave up. Because unhappy and bored to eat cactus, which is incomprehensible? Why should he put his life in the bathroom for her?
////
Who is asking him for that? Live with the young. Maschinkin’s claims are maschinkin’s problems. The question is another. What hero needed to write an opus about what former wife was a hero. It ruined his life, and so on. He ruined his life by living with an inappropriate woman. Divorce is normal. Blame others, and the guy in the white coat. An adult man of 40 years, to take responsibility for his actions, did not hear

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №134374
 05.10.2016
Strange people surround me. Here on the platform of the subway comes, a crumbling, young man, sits on the bench. He takes off his shoes from his left foot, puts on his right foot, and vice versa. He stands up and goes quietly.
So think to me now.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №134373
 05.10.2016
Tech support, remind me which program to run for remote access.

Constance: Timweaver
The astronauts :)
Cosmonauts: in Russian
Tagged: teamviewer
Spacecraft: AAAA

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №134372
 05.10.2016
XXX: I liked a picture of a grandmother

XXX: and she removed her

XXX: and then loaded again

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №134371
 05.10.2016
After 20 years of happy marriage, the husband decided to update his wife’s model. He went to the age of 20, alimony paid from the official, children (four, younger ten, older eighteen) ignored as a fact. I told my friends how ugly I was and how life was ruined.
After a stroke in four years, I don’t understand why I don’t want to see him in the dormitory, leave the second (+1 child) spouse and the children ignore it as a fact.
Men, leaving their wives, leave them. Why do your children become former ones?

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №134370
 05.10.2016
Every time I watch a movie or a series, and the main characters prepare food and are hungry, but have no time to eat, because the end of the world begins, chase, robbery, etc. I am very worried about them.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №134369
 05.10.2016
Gurkchenko vs thick cat:
I did not measure the cat by a centimeter, but I know by work - 2 hands 45 cm. When I grasp my bluse - the fingers do not come together cm 8-10. So the waist at 55 in a cat is quite possible. About Gurchenko - a child of war, a hungry childhood... My cat had neither childhood nor youth hungry. He does not want to go to Tahiti. Nearly 9 kg in the winter, last year the frog caught, brought to boast. A normal Siberian cat that even in the winter for the night goes out (the shelf is always open). by p.s Love and feed your animals.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №134368
 05.10.2016
From the website of Khazin:
In the market, the right invisible hand of the market does not know what and where the left invisible hand of the market does.
Sometimes the hands collide in one pocket and begin to blow each other. The pocket breaks, and the master eats: “Hold the thief!”

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №134367
 05.10.2016
Q: Do you learn Japanese?

YYY: Well, I am trying

XXX: Tell me

YYY: I can send you

XXX: Go to

YYY: Go go naked

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №134366
 04.10.2016
Start going to bed earlier, and in a week you will be a normal person, but then how to get human attention?

And in my opinion, it is normal to live just as you are comfortable, and at the same time to let others live as they are comfortable. At the crossroads - to find compromises, rather than demanding unilaterally to adjust to yourself. It is normal to plan common affairs with a person who leads a different lifestyle from yours, taking into account both yours and his characteristics. Or not planning them at all.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №134365
 04.10.2016
Lost on the way to the Olympics.
Every year in the local forest park is organized a day of health, where crowds of junior students and their parents are accommodated, organized competitions on sports orientation with a simple route, while there is a map. The control points are marked with flags.
My husband grew up in this city, unlike me, the park as he claimed, knows as his five fingers, said that only a full fool can get lost with a map and without a map.
Gave a start. The kids ran along the route. Time is going. Waiting for son. It is time to run in time. He is not and is not. husband, takes a map and also goes on the route with the words I will find him and bring him.
After five minutes, the son and several boys come to the finish, they say they found some mud, swam, but got out.
Waiting for the head of the family. Waited a long time. He and several other similar local dads were found by one of the instructors of the local sports orientation section. At the same time, he said that the situation with fathers, confident in their powers, is repeated regularly - forever takes them somewhere aside. None of the children were lost.

[ + 31 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №134364
 04.10.2016
In the case of distant relatives, the husband abandoned his wife, changing her to a minor.
The arguments are becoming harder, lived until the children grow up, the wife is outstretched, and with the young so interesting and less problems.

He lived with her for a while and dropped her stroke.
This was not what I dreamed of, why am I going to spend my youth?
He was cared for by his ex-wife and grown children.
put on their feet.
He has declared a young woman, the type of return, he has recovered, he is leaving for the second time, now has officially registered marriage.
through some of him falls a second stroke, is now lying paralyzed
Neither his ex-wife nor children took care of him.
The young man cries and curses his ex-wife that she hasn’t treated her, and she’s now laughing.

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №134363
 04.10.2016
I work as an admin in the oncology and children's hospital. It was very difficult for patients to go to doctors.
In general, I decided to conduct a social experiment. Every doctor in the office has a thin client and a monitor, decided to hang a webcam on that monitor.
People changed instantly. No screams, no noise, everything went as it was supposed.
According to the doctor - one uncle tried, but turned his eyes on the camera and ran to the door. He shouted something and left.
Conclusion: If people realize what their behavior and words may involve them, they think before they say anything!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №134362
 04.10.2016
My friend’s grandmother died. She is going to her hometown for a funeral.
We sit with her in the kitchen, drink tea, talk about something. I still feel like I am sick and I sit with a thermometer under my mouse.

I get the thermometer, I see 37.5 and long swing - Wow! The temperature! I am dying!

Friend with business view: Sorry, I’ve gotten all done this week.

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