bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №155155
 13.10.2020
We had a business :)

I found out that the tires also take the price for the tires. He estimated that the tires are 20-25 thousand rubles. He hired kamaz, stumbled on organizations and picked up tires. I came and weighed. He is given a paper for 22 thousand rubles.

He: And where to get the money? and :)

They: What kind of money?

It is for the covers!

They say to him, “You owe us 22,000.” for the recycling!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №155154
 13.10.2020
xxx: Comrade caught his wife in August, here the main smart.

She went to Sochi alone, so it turned out that he could not accompany her. And there lived her ex, well as 7 years passed, they did not communicate, so the comrade had a strict conversation with her, so that there were no meetings with him, categorically. Everything was okay, she left, a couple of days constantly called, and then she began to disappear, just did not take the phone. When asked why this happened, she replied that she did not take her smartphone to the beach because she was afraid that they would be stolen or that was uncomfortable on the tour.

Karoch, the guy had the opportunity to track the location of the phone and periodically browse it, and in the evening asking how the day went, the data varied greatly. He found the meaning of this former Instagram and checked his posts, with the location of his wife. Well, that is, he fasts there, that he has spent a good time in the mountains, on excursions such as that, he believes, and indeed, by the location of the spouse everything came together or there in a restaurant such as that... But all this as if indirectly, and on the last day, before leaving, the wife was already sleeping in the evening, and on the location went to walk on the shore. The comrade opened online cameras, the treasure in Adler was full of them and found a broadcast along the way of the spouse. The cameras all showed how she went in a hug with this ex and sweetly whirled.

Who is smarter is a big question.



The Cyberpunk we deserve.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №155153
 13.10.2020
For me, the most terrible game was FEAR.

Night, one at home, the lights off, only the lamp above the monitor - all by genre.

The moment when a dead girl appears and stands behind the glass. I think, “I’ll step in front of her and she’ll run away.” I walk, and instead of running away, the girl moves towards me.

Someone’s hand on my shoulder. I am measuring. There is no one at home. The door is locked and cannot be opened from the outside. The cat is in the zone of sight and whispers at something behind me. The head from fear does not turn, the music from the game only complements the picture. The second 10 I sat in total oppressive immobility.

It turned out that the lamp from the table fell on my shoulder. =) is

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №155152
 13.10.2020
Xxx: at the age of 8 found the movie "Dolls". was pleased. There it began as a girl sailed on a steam boat, went to lunch, and left the doll on deck. And then big show the face of the doll and she opens her eyes 😳.  I was so scared, I turned off the TV, shaken, hid my doll in the closet and NEVER played in them again and I am still scared, although I am 30 years old.

Yyy: I was probably cleaning the doll in a remote corner at 8 years. Approximately calculated how much time she would need to get to me, when it turned out that the night was not enough for her, she fell asleep. Now it was funny and then it was shit terrible!! Throwing out the doll? You are what! Who to play with in the morning?

Zzz: When I was 5 years old, I was given a toy dog like a long-haired pekinese, who could swallow and at the same time had green eyes. Later I dreamed that this dog with red burning eyes was hunting me. At that time, I was scared by my neighbor’s dog. And all, since then, this beautiful toy went to the room of her parents every night and was locked in the closet, and during the day in the games she performed the most jealous roles. How many years have passed, and I still remember that fear.

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №155151
 13.10.2020
The more Gazprom pays fools in Europe for nothing, the more Russians pay fools in Gazprom for nothing.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №155150
 13.10.2020
Just fate

How much, how much? My grandmother asked. Rather, grandmother, but who will waste time on this unnecessary "pr". Grandma, grandmother, we all called her there. Children, grandchildren and grandchildren. I strangled Lenka for a puffy ass. She whispered, followed by Timka, a favorite, a beloved kid, a Yorkshire terrier, just from a dog barber.
- Don't scare my grandmother with the price, - I struck a friend. What is natural for us and not so expensive for grandmother is a shock and an entire fortune.
Did you get the wool? Meanwhile, we could not wait to answer the question, how much we actually paid for the dog to bathe, dry, shave, look in the mouth, ears and eyes and once again told us that it was not a dog, but gold, in the literal sense, "if you want to sell, just call."
What kind of hair? Lenny interrupted my thoughts.
The dog was surprised.
Why Why?
How is it why?
Ba and Lenka looked at each other and clearly thought that one of them had survived from madness and the other was a fool from birth. Grandma looked at me so sympathetically, as if saying, “Where did you find her so dumb, Danya? Beautiful, of course, but dumb as a trap! They don’t know elementary things!” Ba of value found a bunch of shortcomings in all the chosen or chosen of his numerous descendants. Everything changed magically after the wedding. She was already protecting her new mother with a foam in her mouth and I was sure that we should sign up with Lenocka, she will soon become the best granddaughter in the world. So far we only lived together (which my grandmother did not know) and that’s why my girlfriend’s shortcomings were immeasurable. The nonsense has just added.
"How do you not know, sweet, the shoes, the belt can be tied out of wool, although with your cowboy, a thype, not a belt, not a dog, a toy, - the grandmother carefully licked Timka on the head, and he tried to lick her hand.
“Stupid,” said the grandmother, and wiped out her palm on the front, “the dog must sit on the chain, guard the house, and this what? Yes, her chain to the ground will squeeze, any good pinch will squeeze instantly. The ball.
Lenka broke out and already wanted to say something offensive and degrading, but I took her by the hand and said it was time for us. The grandmother immediately drowned, went to the warehouse for cakes, and I tried to explain to my loved one that in the village it is easier to treat animals.
“It’s not a village, it’s just people like that,” Lenocka spoke through tears and pressed Timka to herself even stronger. I wanted to bite him, but the strawberry cried at me, thinking, it was I brought to tears his beloved mistress, whom he was ready to protect until the last moment of his life.
Oh yeah you! And I buy food for you, I also watched your beloved bedside, I reproached Timka and was surprised that he did not whistle on his grandmother.
We don’t need any cakes, we went.
"Lenchik, don't shower, she didn't want to hurt you, she was raised like this: the dog is guarding the yard, the cat is catching mice, and all. Ba said that in her childhood cats were hardly fed, so they did not stop hunting.
It is cruel!
Yes, but it was so. Not from evil, believe me. She just doesn’t understand how a dog can live in an apartment and sleep with us on the bed.
The beloved dissatisfied with his shoulders and said goodbye to his grandmother dry and unfriendly. I thought she would be hurt too, but she didn’t even take her ear. Ba always believed that they are not yet married and can run away at any time and have nothing to pay special attention to the chosen person or chosen person. Few people came to help her with apples. I loaded Lennochka, Timko and three large baskets of apples into the car, kissed my grandmother and we left.
Where are so many apples? My loved one was quietly angry.
- First, let's eat or give, second, they are still lying down, you will baked the cake, - I squeezed a little. the linen and the kitchen didn't fit together and if I didn't have time to cook something, we ate semi-fabricates or went to the cafe. I hoped that becoming a full-fledged housewife, Lenchik would still learn to at least roast potatoes.
- You would have to go to your grandmother for a cake internship, - I joked unsuccessfully and immediately regretted this inappropriate phrase. Lenka was seriously offended and said that if I need a cook, he is a cooking technician and hundreds of chefs for every taste, and she doesn’t hold anyone.
We often quarreled and not just about the kitchen. I loved her and thought that feeling would help overcome absolutely any obstacles. Time has shown that I was very wrong. But until I knew about it, the future seemed to me difficult but interesting, I dreamed of children, of a large and friendly family, of Sunday cakes and trips. And now my beloved girl was there, Timka grabbed her on her knees and the apples smelled so strong and silly that I felt this moment. I don’t know what will happen next, but I’m absolutely happy here and now. Thank all the gods! I have such a capacity – to sharply feel reality and I am really grateful for it, this usually rarely happens to people, and I have so constantly and for an insignificant occasion. Lenka at such moments was even angry at me, she said, well, what such a happy thing is to pin down the fallen leaves or pick up chestnuts or tear apples or sit at the fire. Is it a chic restaurant, rest somewhere in a fashionable resort, there is happiness, and here...
- Lovely, but this is quite rare! I tried to convince her, because both the restaurant and the resort are such moments compared to a whole life and it is more profitable to enjoy the usual moments, they are more common!
I said too! is more profitable! to whom?
to yourself! Imagine happiness right now because we eat pizza and wine, we’re good together, we’re healthy and young, we’re happy.
I went to a restaurant today! I want to feel happiness there, not here.
“Well,” I laughed, realizing that we’re a little bit on the same wave, “you’ll be happy in the restaurant tomorrow.
In any union, someone always has to take the first step in everything, always someone is more tolerant, always loves a little more. Little or very much? It is like luck.
Lena and I broke up exactly a year later, she gathered up things - her own and Timkiny, saying that we didn't match the character - a convenient and polite parafrase of the words: "I don't love you anymore." I humbled myself before her, prayed for her return, guarded her, watched, thought she had someone else and was preparing to beat him and demand satisfaction. He acted like the last fool, like a hopelessly in love fool. It all passed with time, it really heals and two years later I with a light and free soul, one again went to my grandmother to help her with apples.
- Don't go into the bedroom, - so greeted me the loving bar. The bedroom was a small room in her tiny house - there was a grandmother's bed and a couch. A sacred place for me, there was a seriously ill grandfather, there he died and I always felt that he did not leave there, could not leave grandmother alone. I always went into the bedroom to say hello to my grandfather. Sometimes I even felt the smell of his papyrus there.
Why is? I was surprised how much I remember my grandmother rarely forbade anything so strictly.
- Wasenko was sick, - Grandma smelled a tear.
by Vasenko? I had the thought of an absolutely strange man who is sleeping in the place of his grandfather right now, even hiding with his favourite scrolled blanket, which was carefully folded in the bucket and no one, absolutely no one was allowed to touch him. I was so hurt and unpleasant by this betrayal that I couldn’t find anything to say and only asked:
The Vasena?
Thank you, let’s see, what can you say? My grandmother pulled me by the sleeve. I wanted to say that I am not a doctor and that it would be necessary to call a district therapist, and if you need money for medication to this stranger who dared to enter someone else's life, then I will, of course, help if the grandmother so shakes for this stranger Vasenko. I wanted to say all this, but I looked at the sad grandmother, upset and unhappy, put all my claims in my pocket and entered the house.
- Quietly, quietly, Vasenko, lie down, don't get up, - proverb my grandmother, entering the bedroom, and I became so disgusted, so disgusting, that now on the bed, in the place of my beloved grandfather I will see...
A large red cat stumbled into a silent bowl. Even if he could mock something with such a huge wound in his throat. The smell of a rotten cat met on the doorstep and tried to feed me all.
Can I give him a pill? I washed, but it doesn’t help, you see how it hurts?
The cat, in my opinion, was already half-deathed and he didn’t care. He was lying on a claw and a bench, from the wound the pus came, and the cat was burning. “Fire and outside and inside,” I thought.
"Once upon a time I was a beautiful man," I struck the cat, which did not even lead the ear, "you must have a veterinarian, did you go to him?
- How not to be, of course, ran to him, said nothing to translate any shit of medicine, knock his grandmother with pollen, and in the forest cast, so and advised, thrown, - the grandmother suddenly cried, like a small child, loudly, glimpsing, as if the cruelty of this world just now touched her, as there was no long and difficult life.
I started carefully, where did you get it from?
She wasn’t that she didn’t like cats and dogs, they were easy to replace in her world: to feed, to bury, to take another. The scheme was simple and there was no point of "treatment" in it. Not because my grandmother was evil or insensitive, it was just so that she was brought up.
“I came,” she wiped her tears with a clean cloth and said something quietly.
I didn’t hear you, ba.
- Dan, don't laugh only, I saw this Vasenko, I guessed for some reason: I will cure him, my grandfather will wait for me in that world, will not leave, and I will not cure...
Through the purulent smell I smelled papyrus and suddenly the thought came to my mind: "If we save the cat, the grandmother will still live a long time and the grandfather will stay here with her." I immediately blamed myself for it. You can never guess, for nothing. Especially for the dying cat and the beloved grandmother. “No, there is no connection between the cat and the grandmother!” I repeated about myself, trying to change what came to my mind, to change my thoughts, not to crack.
- Dan, - she cried again, already quietly, hopelessly, - Dan, please help.
"There can only help a miracle," I thought and started wondering: the call to the veterinarian, where Tim was taken, a long conversation with the administrator, the refusal - "we do not treat by photo, bring," I answer that they do not bring, they are silent sympathetically. Please call at least any doctor to the phone, I remember the name of Timkin's therapist - my Lenochka's mother-in-law - Elena Andreevna - a cute, pleasant girl, Lenochka even once competed with me. Wonder is wonderful! Elena Andreevna remembers Timka, she absolutely does not remember me, but out of love for my former dog agrees to look at the photos. I send.
Does he have a temperature? She called again, and by her voice I understood it was bad.
He is smoking.
She breathed. I understood it without words - the cat will not survive.
But there is hope? - I grabbed this fragile straw, and my grandmother and I, as two children, began to wait for miracles from the veterinarian, who had not even seen this red Vasenko.
- I don't know, you know that treating by photography is...
Yes, I understand, but can I do anything?
Take a record.
For our happiness, there was everything we needed in the pharmacy and the matter remained small - to do a few injections, wash the wound and hope for the best. I read, animals feel when they are treated, this same red fox felt nothing and beat like a lion, wishing to die with dignity, without needles and washing.
“And I pretended to be almost a corpse,” I said and assessed the consequences of treatment. The cat scratched my grandmother’s cheek, I got deep scratches on my arms, but I wrapped everything that was ordered and went home.
“No, Donetsk, no, don’t leave,” the grandmother was so frightened, as if a seriously ill relative was dying in her house.
Should I do it again tomorrow? Danny, I won’t be able to help anyone.
I took a breath and called for work.
In the morning, I was afraid that I would see a body on an old cloth near the doorstep, I would see a dull fur - dead, pale, I would see a lost grandmother and I would mourn myself for stupid puzzles and thoughts. Fortunately I was wrong. The cat was alive, although it also looked horrible. To the treatment, my grandmother and I prepared thoroughly: we stitched the cat like a baby so that the leg could not move. But this red patient apparently felt a little lighter and with his butt thought to the logical connection: injections and washing = not so ugly, so not only lyed humbly, but even tried to murmur. My grandmother cried again, now of joy. We treated the cat and I went to tear the apples.
I had to wrap the wax for another week. He became stronger, began to eat and wash, and when he was able to jump out of bed and get out into the courtyard, the grandmother bought out a bottle of loving water and we celebrated the cat’s recovery. Vasenko was tired of the injections and when he did not stand and scratched me again, I decided that he was enough and let nature do its job, let this in some places ungrateful and in some places very grateful patient treat himself. My grandmother lived like a sanatorium and I had no doubt that soon all the neighboring cats would be sick: they are waiting for a division of territory and harsh battles.
- You must give this doctor an apple, - the grandmother chose the most beautiful and red apples in the new basket.
“But I’d better invite her to a restaurant, I’d give her flowers,” I laughed.
- It's like you know, and from us and your apple, this is the most vitamin!
If the grandmother decided something, it was impossible to overtake her and I took the apples.
Elena Andreevna at first for a long time refused both the restaurant and the flowers, but the apples took immediately.
- You know, they have such a smell, I will not even eat them right away, I just put them in my room, I will first try to saturate them with the smell, - she so funny and deliciously pulled her nose that I wanted to ask her for one apple. I felt that in her hands they were lightened, became even more beautiful.
"Life is so temporary, I love to enjoy every moment, I try to enjoy it," she told me already at dinner in a restaurant and something in her words heard so familiar and native that I suddenly offered her to come to my grandmother, to admire the apple garden, the autumn flowers and, of course, Vasenko.
Elena Andreevna, Lenochka, was the only person whom the grandmother accepted joyfully and unconditionally immediately, at first glance, not only accepted, but loved and attached with all her soul.
“You will be an idiot if you don’t marry this girl,” the father said to me, adding that such people as her are extremely rare, “and the doctor in the family won’t bother,” he laughed.
She is a veterinarian, I repaired.
“What a difference,” replied the father, “we are all human beasts.
If fate exists, it comes just like this: unexpectedly and unusual. She came to me in the face of a red, wounded cat and in my grandmother’s fears. I could never understand why she adopted that cat, why she did not drive it out and started treating. Later, she could not answer that question herself. Just a destiny.

Author Oksana Nareiko

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №155149
 13.10.2020
If you had a million, what would you do?
I would pretend I had nothing.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №155148
 12.10.2020
Grey budnies will flourish if you learn to distinguish 50 shades in them!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №155147
 12.10.2020
“Take a hole and not respect others – all as in school, all as in school, all as in school.”

Walking during the lunch break to the nearest supermarket, I often see my former classmate Vanu. I remember how in the 11th grade he came to us from another school and on the backdrop of common interests quickly fit into our company, which often spent time, in order to consume hot drinks.
However, to stay longer than a couple of months in our group of interests Ivan could not because of the fact that he loved to arrive, but somehow forgot to go to this matter. This behavior was not quite understandable for us, as the money of a person was conducted and according to the standards of the student is quite decent.
As soon as lawful claims were made to the defendant, he immediately concealed his fierce resentment and instantly stopped greeting us for almost two weeks. Further relations normalized, but talks about joint meetings no longer went.
Now, a little more than 10 years later, I meet the hero of this story almost every day, as we work in the nearby offices of the same office building. One day on the way to the store, we had a conversation:

You work as a lawyer, right?
All is so.
My friend has a question, can you help?
Of course, what is the question?
He had to repair the roof a little. As soon as the case came, the advance payment was taken and removed.
Is there a contract?
Yes, there were other papers.
Let him come with all the documents. Let us understand. Can I run the clock at 5am tomorrow?
Of course, and you... how much will it cost? Or by friendship?

After these words, Vanya began to smile, but I pretended not to have heard the last phrase and replied:

- Consultation X rubles, and then it all depends on the case.

Judging by the instantly sleeping smile, Ivan was not very pleased with such a response, but still continued:

I understood. Let me transfer you money on the card through the clock, and with you a consultation.
Without a problem. Keep your card, you can translate it.

After that conversation, I began to anticipate fun. Is it worth saying that I did not receive money either on the day of our meeting or the next day when his relative was supposed to come? I already started to think that I was forgotten, but exactly at the appointed time a man entered the door of the office.

I am from Ivan. Did he tell you about me?
Hi I said.
is excellent. Here are the documents, let me tell you how it was.
Without a problem. I just want to clarify something.
What exactly?
Ivan said he would pay for the consultation, but I did not see the money. I understand correctly that you will pay for my services yourself.
and no. Vanessa had to pay for it.
I understand, but nothing came from him, I have already checked.

After that, a man came out of my office, apparently to call Ivan. In a few minutes he comes back.

Everything is OK. He will pay afterwards.
Wait when later?
When the money comes. How do I know?
Sorry, but only after payment.
What else does this mean?
That means I won’t work until I get paid.
Do you have a conscience? I went specifically to you through the whole city.
You can pay for my work yourself.
A goodbye to you.
All the good.

Hearing my farewell, the man suddenly stood up from the chair, but then stopped for a few seconds, looking me in the eyes, making it clear that for that short moment I still have a unique opportunity to work for him for free. However, without seeing the desired reaction on my face, the client left the office, leaving me proudly alone.
And then, the next day, passing by me on the street, Ivan once again pretends that we don’t know him. I wonder how long it will last this time.

Everything is like in school, Vanya, everything is like in school.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №155146
 12.10.2020
Mousohranovo in Kemerovo region.
Did anyone read correctly from the first attempt?

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №155145
 11.10.2020
XXX: It was in 1997. I came from military school to my parent’s home on my first vacation.

On the second or third day the phone rings. I am home alone. I raise the telephone: "A day-to-day twenty-first company of XXX students! “” At that end, a woman’s voice said, “Oh, gentlemen...” and they put the phone on.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №155144
 11.10.2020
I got married early at 21. On a very good girl, but after some time began to live with her somehow not very, then a son was born, and living with her became worse.



I drank endlessly on various occasions, and often without a reason.

"Look, Yulia's husband drives her three times a year abroad, and we only once were in Egypt.

- Natashkin's husband gave her a jeep, and you just bought me a fiesta.

- That you are constantly working, you are going to be at home, you need to spend more time with me.



I thought about divorce as if it was out of place. That would be good, of course, but it is all in some way. What people will think, the son is small again. How do I give up. The apartment and other properties are already in use.



Then I started having pressure. Specifically such a joke. And six years ago I went to the hospital, and I was hanged a device there to measure pulse, pressure and so on over the course of the day. And when I gave this device, the next day the doctor invited me to a conversation:



Meet me, this is my psychiatrist.

I am not crazy, I smiled.

“We are all a kind of psychic,” said the psychologist.

Did you have a scandal at home yesterday?

It’s okay, but why are you asking?

"Well, look, in the morning you went to work, the pressure and pulse is fine, and at 6 o'clock you went home?

- Yes

And it started. Look at the schedule. Pulse slaps, tachycardia, pressure 180/120 and so on to the night.



Then I told him everything. That I don’t want to go home because there’s a depressing atmosphere, that I’m the first volunteer for long journeys, that I prefer to go out to the production with a overnight stay to watch the tech process, though it’s not my turn. Because I am well there, and my home is bad.



He listened, left me and said:

I will be brief. If you want to live, you have to decide something for yourself. You either get divorced or you die. I am not joking. I will not advise you to go to a family psychologist and all that. Too many years you’ve been married, 14 years is not a joke. My advice to you, as a man to a man, and as a doctor to a patient. and divorce.



It caught me very well. He walked to the car like a lost man. There was no courage to divorce. I thought, I thought, I didn’t invent anything, because the tuffak is not brave in this regard. Even the thoughts were like this: it would be great if she had changed me, and then I would have accused her and divorced in full law. Tom is such a nonsense. But I did not have the courage to come and say. Well, I thought that this is my karma, and I will continue to live, and the doctor may be wrong and generally tolerate - fall in love and all that. It was so until a moment.



I bought furniture for a new apartment. There was a bunch of cardboard left in the corridor. I wanted to throw it out, but the wife said that her brother would come and take what was there in the garage to bed on the roof. This card is for a week. On Monday I have a plan, a meeting. The call, wife

I feel uncomfortable calling again.

What a meeting, listen to me!! When will you clean your card? Twenty times I told you, I just fell through it, broke my nail, you are a man or not, how much to endure?



I turned off the phone, something inside me seemed to be broken. I apologized and said I had to leave immediately. He sat in the car, came home, went to the bedroom, collected trousers, socks in the sports bag, put carabines in the blankets, took them into the car. He returned, took his jacket, more things, and took it back into the car. I returned and said that I would not live with her anymore and divorce. He left and did not return.



That night I slept on the office sofa. Then I rented the apartment, there was a week of depression, I was released from work, nobody touched me. Then he began to live slowly. After a while I realized I was alive. Fuck, I don’t exist, I live a full life! I have a great job, great prospects, I am still young, I am only 36, I am strong and healthy, I no longer have a headache! Let it go! I am living!



Then I started living with a good girl and bought a house. She lived with her in a new house. And what’s interesting: I don’t like traveling anymore, I don’t want to stay after work to work anymore, I want to go home. Home is the place where I feel comfortable and comfortable. Where there is a good person I want to come to soon. I stopped being afraid of my home, I became interested in living.



And once an adult already my son told me in secret:

Dad, that is the case. I don’t know how to tell you, but I must. It may not be right, but I respect your wife more than my mother.

I am an officer. And he asked him:

Why is that so, son?

I do not know. I think she loves me. And you too. She will never go with us. rightly?

It is true, son...



Do not be afraid to change your life. She is alone with us. If you don’t want to live your whole life with a person who “kills” you, divorce, it’s not at all painful.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №155143
 10.10.2020
In our youth, we make mistakes thoughtlessly and recklessly, but in old age, we are already professionally approached by the choice of mistakes to make.

[ + 45 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №155142
 10.10.2020
I broke my coat last winter. Well, I think it was a copeic thing, I went to the atelier. In the atelier! Nothing in our city. I go in. Everything in hand-crafted shoes, the ceilings are high, everyone "hello" to you, smiles. The price of the question? Here you need to evaporate the lock, sew a new one. Somewhere two days. It will cost a half. I think what fate to experience, fucking you. Go to! She: Only the castle needs to be purchased separately, it is there. The castle is not included in the price. Okay well. I buy a house for 150 and I think. I’m cheaper at it! I go to a half-double who does not claim at the Atelier. I am charged 700 for everything. And then I remember how my coryphane praised an old Chinese man who does ALL! He shoots in the TC some corner under the ceiling. There some cleaning supplies were stored before, and then the greedy owner decided to give away these unfortunate square meters. I come, not counting on anything especially, take a jacket, a lock and hardly find this barbecue. I get stuck between the keys, some shoes, things... “Hello to you!” by GRU. Here is my trouble. He says, “We’ll change a dog and you’ll go.” I didn’t have time to open my mouth, he placed a flat-sleeve twice, a new one. “How much?” “The Seventy Five.” “How much?” Seventy five rubles. So, I made a slug. I have a wallet in my car. Could you take the castle? It is 150.” “Halloween!” He takes and stretches me. I said, “Leave it to yourself!” “No! I won’t take more,” and smiles... I went out with a jacket and a hundred in my pocket, smoked and thought for a long time. About what? Yes about everything! We Russians are just, honest, we will not abandon each other in trouble. All the other fools and fools.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №155141
 10.10.2020
“My worker was a wonderful man – he taught me how to work with a hand tool, gave me the basics of electrical engineering, and the door pen, which I finished on a timber machine, still stands on the door in the garden of my parents.
- And our sold on the market with our crafts, with cardboard:
Children with disabilities with mental retardation (

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №155140
 10.10.2020
Once in the year edak in 2000 I had a computer on which, among other things, was the game Moorhuhn. My father never played anything but a preference on the compass, but this game caught him heavily. Since he worked like a cursed man, he played at night. And, being a person quite gambling and enthusiastic, well succeeded in this game, showing cool results (who remembers - there was not just a shot of chickens, there were also cunning combo that had to be found, taught and performed).



Accordingly, in the table of leaders (example from below) he was in the first place (I did not play chicken) and constantly fought himself with his own records.



So I decided to triple it (then there was not this word, but the essence of it was), set up ArtMoney, and after school, while my father is not there, I hacked this table with the program and added a little more points than my father's record, thus getting on the first line. My father was very surprised, sometimes angry, and at night tried to break my fake record. and beat. The next day it repeated again. and again.



My father’s hunting chickens I pumped well, but I’m still ashamed of this deception. I have never confessed to him so far. I think it will be the hardest confession in my life. This is the story.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №155139
 09.10.2020
A woman cannot be beaten, but she can be struck.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №155138
 09.10.2020
There will be a chain of invested stories, like in "Thousand and One Nights": the storyteller met the dervis, who gave him the story of a merchant, who knew one sailor, and already with the sailor something remarkable happened. But without that no.

Two years ago, in the spring of 2018, I went to the dentist. I live in Chicago, the teeth of a Russian dentist named Xenia. She, whilst crawling in my mouth, always tells me something interesting, and I support the conversation with whispering and ehecaning, with an open mouth you can’t say anything more valuable.

That time she told me about her other patient, Andy (the second link in the chain). Andy under 70, an ordinary American of the middle class. He had an old friend, apparently from school, from Argentina, some kind of Pedro or Pablo (third link).

This Pablo, like the Argentinian, was obsessed with football and took a vacation every four years and went to the world championship to get sick. The funds allowed, the family did not object because of the lack of one. This continued until 2006, when Pablo was diagnosed with cancer. Despite the loss of hair after chemistry and the loss of a number of insides after surgery, he felt pretty good and decided to go to Germany, but he was eager. And he called Andy.

For Andy, like for every decent American, there was only one football – the one with an oval ball. A socker is a nonsense that girls sometimes play. But this is the case, a friend of Pablo dies, asks for help, and also pays for everything. And Andy agreed.

They had a great time. We watched all the matches, drank a barrel of beer, broke the voices, sick for Argentina. When Argentina left, they fell sick for Portugal. Four years with enthusiasm remembered it, then went to South Africa, again together. Pablo was already in a wheelchair, but this did not prevent them from greatly falling into vuvuzeles, sick for Argentina and then for Spain. Andy even began to understand the rules and remember some of the players.

After South Africa, cancer still hit Pablo. He left a will, in which some amount was written off by Andy with a mandatory condition: to spend it on trips for all future World Cups. Andy travelled to Brazil alone. One was standing on the podium and crying when Argentina came to the final, imagining how happy Pablo would be.

When it became clear where the next World Cup will be held, Andy’s wife said that Brazil is Brazil, and she won’t let him go to Russia. Will go with him. Then their daughter said that they both went crazy, she will not let the two crazy old men into the wild country and goes too. Andy breathed and bought three sets of tickets instead of one. But when he looked at the cost of housing in Moscow and Peter during the championship, he realized that something had to be done, otherwise all of Pablo’s money would end right now and there would be nothing left for the next championship. In Brazil, such a shame was not even near.

Andy sought help from the only Russian he knew, his dentist, Xenia. In Moscow, she found him a room with her distant relatives, and Peter knew no one and asked if I didn't know anyone.I don't regret, I threw a request on Facebook, and immediately found a friend from Peter with a free room and almost free English, who for quite a moderate money agreed to accommodate Andy and his family.

Why I remembered all this. Yesterday I was treating my teeth again, and Xenia told me she had Andy recently. very happy. He had a grandson. The daughter’s parents were already worried that she would never get married and would never give them grandchildren. Luckily, she came out and gave it. Her husband is a Croatian, a little younger than her, a beautiful man. Where did we meet? Yes, in St. Petersburg, in the fan zone, and we met.

I think of this newborn boy. What a small world he lives in. In a world where a Croatian dad and an American mom met in Russia, where my mother came by the will of an Argentinian. And with the ma-a-alien participation of one Belarusian Jew, about whom this guy probably will never know.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №155137
 09.10.2020
Unlike British scientists, Irish scientists do not invent anything after they have invented whiskey.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №155136
 09.10.2020
As a child, my father always told me:

"Do not approach strangers on the street", "do not approach unfamiliar bags / bags", "company suspicious bypass side."



Thirty years later, I say to Bat:

No messages were sent to unknown numbers.

Do not download unknown files from the Internet.

“Do not open the door to suspicious people with miraculous advertisements, do not click on suspicious links.”

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