A 30-year-old man comes to the job of a warehouser.
I read the resume, talk about the duties and conditions of work, ask:
Are there questions?
and yes. Do you pay for travel from home to work?
and no.
Do you pay for mobile phone?
and no.
Will there be a free lunch?
and no.
We had this in our previous work.
Why did you leave such a wonderful company?
Yes, she has collapsed.

XXX is
Which plan would you recommend to take with you?

YYYY
I am an idol fan of Apple.

XXX is
I don’t even eat apples.

YYYY
It is a sacred fruit.

YYYY
Bite on one side.

Angelina Jolie will play animal advocate Brad Pitt

A hundred pounds across the bed!

The task:
Vasya promised to come to me today and return $1,000, and Petya promised to come and borrow 1,000 rubles. Question: Who came to me and who did not?

Hello to you! How about internship?
and slowly.
I wanted to ask, where can we buy surgical pills?
- Ep... well there is one store *******, and so it happens ******, and you why?
I picked up a set of Dexter’s knives. The pile is missing.
Do not call here anymore! Do you hear?! to
...

Snezhkin: I sit in a coffee shop (in Taganrog). I drink tea and read something on Facebook. I charge my phone from the laptop. And I see that people are taking too much care of my note. Well, I think Macbook and iPhone, maybe they like them? And they look, most importantly, so joyfully... It came: a beautiful clean white notebook, a dear phone - connected by a cable, which in three places is wrapped in a blue insulated...

Instructions on how to get the car in the frost from the car website:
If it doesn’t help, leave her alone, because she also has a soul. I just don’t want to go anywhere today."

French politician and former head of the IMF Dominique Strauss-Kahn during a speech in Kiev:

No one in Europe wants to die for Ukraine, not even money. You are in this battle for yourself. There was a lot of talk here about solidarity with Ukraine, but I have a question: where is the money? Talk is just words... To ask for something, you have to give something. You have given nothing to anyone except anger and hatred. You betrayed the country that made you, fed you with a spoon. The whole world knows it. Traitors are not liked anywhere. They only use it".

Introduction to Microprocessor Technology:
- to play quality music requires a capacity of more than 30, and such a capacity is very expensive. Therefore, quality equipment is expensive. In practice... a break... for rap and two sets is enough.

Comment on the article "How to make a ringtone for iPhone":
Goodbye: man, let God keep you, a little more and I would r###ball this phone, thank you.

The Moldovan politician by the name of Usaty has no buttocks. No one, no one can be trusted!

This is:
— — —
The author is this:
andquot;
gol> the guy wanted to name the coffee shop there "Express", so that everyone would bomb.
gol> so I would go even further
gol> in the menu would make "delicious coffee express" 50 rubles and "delicious coffee espresso" 100 rubles
gol> and would watch for days how this hipstot for 50 rubles daily sells his ideals
andquot;
The correct variant of coffee - it is male (thus delicious coffee express 100 rubles, and delicious coffee - 50 rubles), then it will be logical.
Remember coffee - it is "he", and "he" - it is shit and the Ministry of Education :))
and----
I think you didn’t understand the essence of the original trolling...

Guardians of the Galaxy might become the new Indiana Jones

Lord Orange: The Homo?! to

I write to a girl:
I: straight I see the picture: from the foam throwing your head on one side (leaning on a towel) and your toes - on the other.
And I am so meekly carrying my hand from your fingers down your foot.
He stayed a little on his legs, then further to his knee.
From the knee on the inner side of the hip
She is stooop!! Oh yeah! I have a brother and a mother!! And I’m already red and chicking suspiciously)))

......

What will Katie not go to the bathroom and go on to work? :D

I: Well yeah, you pulled me a little off the track with your borst =)
I thought that in a moment my fingers would be in something very warm and moist, but I didn’t think it would be borst =)

Why do I love him? Self-criticism for example. On the third day we went to the store. This male form of life moves through the alcoholic department. I look at him silently. He honors:
What do I want? The dark beer? Do you eat light beer? No number of! The guilt? The whiskey? The vodka? Fuck me, I am so shy with you...

xxx: I now encountered my old scientific code, written under antidepressants. and Eeee. They are. of AAA. I want to joke that I clearly wrote it under heavy substances, but it’t even be a joke.

There were also ordinary people in Egypt, well, with an amendment to the era. But for some reason in Greece, Rome, Scandinavia and other countries it was almost no worse, and the penalties fell only on Egypt.
__________________________________

Egypt was not fortunate to have god-elected slaves.

Ash WooD: It is clear. Give it where?
SaSiSka: "sold" Very strange word.
Arhitecter: subdued and rotted very common neologisms

Ktolhu: The dealer of the UAZ called, offered "diagnostics of the car", on the question "and what you will diagnose" answered. "the car". On the pointing "walk or move" the answer "buzz there, suspension". The answer "Salon is the only thing it has left" to satisfy them. No longer attached.

X: Today fucking just an epic situation was
I was in the bus, we have one turn drivers there never brake and fly it across a wide radius, practically going to the meeting. Nothing would happen if a tank had not been on our turn.
The driver of the fucking shutter, his mother, managed to get around.
I have already submitted the summaries on the accident and the headlines in the newspapers
A: Nothing is ordinary. This is just typical ******* XD