bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №102149
 26.08.2014
I bring as much as I can - suitcase on wheels
I saw your suitcase, you wandered with it.
We were young and as much as we could.
WOW: It was 2 days ago

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №102148
 26.08.2014
I have a kindergarten under my windows... and every morning the dumb dwarfs are running through my throat – they don’t want to go there. The Tree of Pain of 300 Spartans.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №102147
 26.08.2014
Lev: You answer me, what is this country and its inhabitants?I am thirty years old and I still do not understand it.
LEV: Imagine a man going into the woods, his mother into the woods, there is only a forest hundreds of kilometers around, even if they die - they will not find. Forests, birds, berries, whites, beauty, even paintings write. And with all that, with all that... Go in the middle of the trail!!! Tell me, what kind of people are they?? to

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102146
 26.08.2014
Kaboska (16:46:09 25/08/2014)
Do you know that your superblaster perforator works when we have children in our guests?? to

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №102145
 25.08.2014
Once there was a conversation about young doctors... For many years I have licked my teeth in one clinic, my wisdom teeth are subject to planned removal (i.e. how they will start to bother, running to the doctor)) One removed an elderly surgeon, crushed all the gums, crushed with a hammer and a toothbrush, muddled this, healed for six months. The second is a young girl surgeon, maybe not immediately after honey, but nevertheless... I got into this chair, the whole life has passed before my eyes, everything is darkening, I feel this girl is squeezing slightly and something with a sharp smell in the nose is swept - an experienced nurse has overwhelmed with anesthetic "and what? He is very healthy" I sat for another half an hour, let go, I go to the second round. Well, in general, how she pulled out the crumbling top eight with one handy move, I didn’t even notice. Here is your experience.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №102144
 25.08.2014
Check out the list of products prohibited for sale:

Rocket and space systems, communications and control systems for military purposes and regulatory and technical documentation for their production and operation.

Thus e. Have there been cases?

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №102143
 25.08.2014
But you say, it’s hard to agree with women.

Baby, we meet tomorrow.
Yyyy, at what time is it?
XXX is tomorrow.
YYYY: Diema, the time?
XXX is tomorrow.
YYY: At how much?
XXX is yes.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №102142
 25.08.2014
I will add from myself (just the one who "learned all his life by books"):
It is not even a lack of experience here, because there is experience, although it is little, but in its mostly dark shade. Judge yourself, when at 20 you fall in love for the first time (remember, ideas about relationships grow only from different kinds and quality of books) and try to behave as you think that people who love each other behave, you have almost no chance to notice that next to you is the last bastard. Well, then how lucky I am... I am not lucky.
I started working at the age of 14, and spent the rest of my time taking care of the elderly and the little ones. I didn’t have any friends or relatives I could ask for advice from, but then I hoped that books would really help me learn something. And you know, now I understand that such lucky people like me would be better at all to be one, because it’s really easier. Yes, you will be lonely, but no one will betray or hurt you for being a fool from another planet, believing that sincerity, honesty and loyalty at least value something in this “normal” world of “experienced” people.
— — —
Bone for 34 years.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №102141
 25.08.2014
The question:

And from myself, I will add, as surprising this is not what hell, it is a direct duty to punish a man with deprivation of sex!!! I was told by my friends – “Cut it off, drive it out on the counter, or go there yourself!” "Nothing in the world! I will be silent, not talking, but I will take my in the sexe! And if I come home drunk and late, I will rape so that I can’t get up in the morning. Maybe that’s why we live with him soul to soul, and we argue very rarely... once every three years...

When is the sober coming?

[ + 28 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №102140
 25.08.2014
from the cinema. and burned)

Shurik331 - Commentary on 13th District: Brick Mansions A lot of piracy. I am not against sexual minorities. This is what children are watching! 3 of 5

Shurik331--Commentary to the movie: Yes, I don't understand this gay propaganda in the movie. The movie itself is not bad. But because of geisha only 4 out of 5. Distributed thanks.

Shurik331--Commentary to the movie Maleficent: The movie is not very, but watched in the cinema. There is a big inclination towards gays, as if they want to make it an ordinary thing. 3 of 5. Thanks to the distributor.

Shurik331--Commentary to the movie One Meeting: The movie is nothing like that, but this gay propaganda has already gotten. I am loyal to them, if they are not seen or heard...but there is pps. Film 4 of 5. Distributed thanks.
......

Kikkimiki: I noticed this by chance. It’s about one person’s movies. Don’t you think you’re a latent pitcher?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №102139
 25.08.2014
I am soon 37, and still, sitting in the hairdresser under this barbecue, I try to push my hand out of it and scratch my nose, even if I really want to. I am a courageous person in life, but in this simple action lies some monstrous challenge. A challenge to the system. I have seen people stand up for their truth with guns in their hands, die on barricades and overthrow governments, but I have NEVER seen anyone just pull their hand out of this blanket and scratch their nose. It would seem, you can ask a hairdresser, but if someone asks a hairdresser about such things I have never seen either. The last time I was sitting in the barber room, thinking about it and couldn’t force myself to break the System. So I sat.

The Foot! I’m forty years old and I’ve learned how to scratch my nose when the hairdresser turns around to change the scissors for a trimmer!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №102138
 25.08.2014
xx: There lived a very ingenious but very lazy office worker.
xx: And one day he sits at work on his Facebook and Twitter, likes, reposts and retweets. Nothing predicted trouble.
xx:..How suddenly behind him appeared a gender and began to watch his unlocked Facebook.
xx: Here the worker needed all his cleverness, so that he would not be thrown out of work.
This is how the first SMM manager appeared

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №102137
 25.08.2014
Another collection of photographed photos "before" and "after"...

There are two identical photos of Chuck Norris with a comment:

Photoshop thinks that Chuck is perfect... and doesn’t want to take any risks.

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №102136
 25.08.2014
The city centre is full of people. By the way, the unbroken, life-threatened man, aged 30- 35, of a drunken appearance, but seemingly sober, swarms with scattered cords. He sees two aluminum cans near the urn, tosses them with his legs and throws them into a bag. He looks into the urn, gets two more, also vigorously scatters and sends there. He passes a few meters further, sits in a new beha with a pathos sporting curtain and hides behind the horizon in 3 zimas of gas.
The crowd at the stop accompanies him with overwhelmed jaws and a loud whisper from the inside (a female voice, with indiscriminate envy):
I struck...

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102135
 25.08.2014
The word "pedagogue" comes from ancient Greece and literally means "leading a child". But they did not call it a teacher, but a slave who took the child to school and brought him back. Usually, the teachers chose slaves, unsuitable for any other work, but distinguished by their loyalty to the house.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №102134
 25.08.2014
From the status "vkontakte": "Do not dry the wind in the top of the star".

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102133
 25.08.2014
The fact is that my mom bought me beautiful delicious vitamins "Trol" as a child.
HH: That’s how it happened.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №102132
 25.08.2014
Oh, long ago did not laugh so :) According to my own experience, the refusal of sex is a punishment for a woman, and for a man a long-awaited rest!!! I don’t argue, sex is, of course, good (although dirty and unesthetic) but not very often, but better in general every time with different women:

First place in the troll competition and send to the international Olympics!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102131
 25.08.2014
of the Habra.

Alexeyco, 24 August 2014 at 12:50
I’ve been in an accident twice as a passenger, one time very unpleasant. Second time after the accident. I am afraid to drive wildly - I look forward to when the autopilots will appear.

1eqinfinity, 24 August 2014 at 12:59
Autopilot transformers to fight too :)

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №102130
 25.08.2014
VK, comment to the news "RZD and “Rosatom” are working on the domestic operating system":

The system from the RZD is like a train to Adler. No window opens.

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