bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №102109
 25.08.2014
About porn and "self-sufficiency": even if I know how to cook, it does not mean that I will not be pleased to polish a cookbook and maybe even write out a couple of recipes :)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102108
 25.08.2014
Notes: I remembered something. from student life: "children, should I add a laurel in my palm? Fuck, it’s more expensive than these P_T"s

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №102107
 25.08.2014
My grandmother complains to her grandson:
He is not eating anything at all! I lost a kilogram again.
Mother :
He is 8 years old. He loses 1 kg every month. It seems like my son ended a few years ago :)

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №102106
 25.08.2014
Lel Vil: Borrowed these with the distant light. As if they were blind.
Dioxide Rail: The Darkness Fears
Dioxide Rail: Suddenly a baby?
Lel Vil: Ah, shob for a kilometre of Chupacabru to see, be afraid in advance, so to say :D
Dioxide Rail: Oh... and lift her eyes up.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №102105
 25.08.2014
In the year 2030, a celebrated wedding photographer is interviewed.
Do you have any other stories that you didn’t use in your wedding filming?
Oh yes of course! For example, a witness fucking a bride on eternal fire using a bondage, and a fatu as a clap!
- It seems like this company you used 10 years ago to shoot the magazine "People"?
and yes? In the hand of the bridegroom?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №102104
 25.08.2014
Catherine: Oh, I am pumping through financial literacy here.
Lola: Yes I understand it.
Because I am too poor to remain financially illiterate)))
You know, practice has shown that you can live a thousand a week.But fucking, reluctance)))))))))))))))
Ekaterina: A thousand a week to live in general

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102103
 25.08.2014
In one chapter in the soc. Networks survey:How to make a girl start to watch the figure?
Vasily Smolny
Shake your ass, say "oh, the wave has gone!"

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №102102
 25.08.2014
I work in the media. A letter arrives at the work mail.
"Good day to you!
I am sending the release "The Post of Russia does not plan to rebranding".
With respect,
Specialist in public relations of the UFPS of the Nizhny Novgorod region..."

Options for headlines to news:
Nothing happened on the post today.
and
Post of Russia: we put a bucket on your opinion

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102101
 25.08.2014
I am standing at the entrance, three boys of eight years and one of five years old pass by:
If you are going to offend me, I have an older sister, I will call her.
How old is she?
I don’t know, maybe 50 years.
It was so funny)))))) a serious argument)

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №102100
 25.08.2014
X: Yes, the pigs are all there.
Y: Well, I am in a poch)
X: The choice, by the way, on the nose. Candidates are everywhere.
Y: Eehh, if they were really hanged... and so only the posters

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №102099
 25.08.2014
was recently at the exhibition. There is a small young man in a cage. Behind it sits her master, such a small and unthinkable man. On the cage a colorful bench with a photo of the cat, breed, name, age, pet - all honor to honor.
On the side of the cage, a white white paper of wind control was placed. A woman approaches, begins to carefully read a paper of wind control, trying to disassemble the doctor's carcass: "Shaya...shalom. berry...beria...ze..." And joyfully screams somewhere to the side "Ira, Ir go here, see what a cat here is a breed of shalomberidze!"

The owner of the abicca arises, and with such a roaring baritone, he says very kindly: "Shalamberidze is me! And this (referring to the stand with the photo and data of the little girl) is ABISCIN!"

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №102098
 25.08.2014
The XIII:
It was funny, but I had a real dialogue.
Did you not notice anything?
Has your hair cut?
No is!
A new dress?
and no.
I don’t know then...
I cut my hair!
So I told you first.
You guessed, and I wanted you to notice.
and?? to

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №102097
 25.08.2014
From Habr. Article about Google’s driverless car and digital simulator:
And why would Google not make this simulator online, so that everyone can ride next to that Google car, simulating the “real” behavior of drivers?
WOW: Because then it will happen that a crowd of angry drivers will be chasing a Google car with destructive goals.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №102096
 25.08.2014
Every time an additional mechanism for security is invented, somewhere another mechanism of natural selection on the level of intelligence is sad.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №102095
 25.08.2014
His parents from Italy brought him Mussolini's bust
Yyy: This is what I understand the healthy attitude to my son’s hobbies.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №102094
 25.08.2014
XXX: I torment the acinator. The question "your character is a teacher?" "yes", the next one immediately after it "your character is familiar with the devil?" I even got confused somehow...

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №102093
 25.08.2014
In the year 97 we also gathered in the playrooms and cuddled until the morning, until the dawn. And nothing—normal people worked out, except for those who were sitting or accumulated from drugs...in general, I was the only one left.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102092
 25.08.2014
A friend issued a great slogan for advertising cigarettes with a superagent surname: "Bond-die, but not now".

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №102091
 25.08.2014
I sit on the internet, I don’t touch anyone. And here begins the siren of emergency situation. It is never funny such a sirene, which voices on our entire AND area, and, in the current situation, can even signal military actions. I was scared, looking out the window. I don’t have a telephone to know what it is. I started breaking the internet. And here is what I found on city.dp.ua:

“Before the start of the “Hody of Glory” at 10:15, the entire region will stop and honor the memory of the dead in the ATO zone with a minute of silence, and the service of the HCS of the region will turn on its syrene. The signal, which usually symbolizes an emergency, on this day will be a symbol of respect for the heroes of the country, who gave their lives for the future.

ppp: they would still have an air parade from bombers immediately after the syrene launched - it would be fun at all.

[ + 11 - ] Comment quote №102090
 25.08.2014
I drink, you drink, we drink, you drink
A disappointing class.
It came about Russia.
The story...

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