bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №102349
 31.08.2014
How do you explain that a chicken carries eggs? Red is not a color? There are libraries and there are books. The calendar is fragmented. I don’t understand what the problem is? I was told at one time, I also explained to my children. And even what is the hole on the shell - also understood. I will continue in the same spirit with my grandchildren.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №102348
 31.08.2014
YYY: How to be successful?
XXX: Call Chip and Dale
YYY :?? to
Where they are, always success!

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №102347
 31.08.2014
from IRC channel about politics
14 million Russian experts in politics, culture and information technologies will go to school tomorrow

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №102346
 31.08.2014
"The classic neighbor with a perforator" and the same with them:
Your "vengeance" to the fans of the mud must have awakened the whole house, ruining the morning sleep of uninterested people. Next time I advise you to just click on the flagship of the corresponding apartment's electrical security.

P.S In especially advanced cases, that flag with the root is crumbled by the rotating movement of the flat clusters.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №102345
 31.08.2014
here here :
--------
xxx: Still Core i7 is good) In addition to speed there is another nice bonus)
YYY: What, are they not burning?
xxxxxxxxxxx (
--------
Oh guys, I also have a Core i7 and it’s cool at home. What games are you playing?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102344
 31.08.2014
to this:

This is one of the most important things in the world.
Unstoppable 3
In the cinema there are two versions +12 and +18. What are you doing at +18? I did not guess. They smoke!
This is one of the most important things in the world.

And I went to "City of Sins 2", so there just before the movie appeared a huge warning "This film contains scenes of smoking. Smoking is dangerous to your health". Apparently, these are the most dangerous for teenagers scenes that can be in a modern film.

[ + 22 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №102343
 31.08.2014
Citizens of Volokolamsk, I am looking for a robot to combine with study and work, because I am studying without a scholarship, I need money, I am not entirely summer, please help, very please!
= is
Citizens of Volokolamsk, as well as other cities of the Moscow region and adjacent territories!
Make sure, please, that this miracle in the feathers finds work, in no way related to written/printed texts, order?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №102342
 31.08.2014
Vovoka watched on TV interview with Jane Psaki and understood how to answer questions from teachers at the exam when you know nothing.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №102341
 31.08.2014
"You would put a hat on your head, or you would get sick again," the internal organs shouted to the member. But it was no longer to stop him.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №102340
 31.08.2014
here here :

My older cat, when I was alive, came to me when I ate breakfast and checked what I was eating. And if it was a eyelid (defined by the smell), he spoke such a short and decisive word me, indicating that their Majesty wanted to pull out my plate, and therefore I must leave on it a sufficient amount of yellow (protein I was allowed to eat the fullest). After that, I was obliged to bring the plate under a special inclination to His Majesty's mouth so that he could comfortably pull out the plate without the risk of swallowing his furry collar. The only thing that their Majesty never allowed herself to do was go down to eat at the table. He ate politely sitting in the master's chair - so seeing their majesty entering the kitchen during breakfast, the master had to honor him by rising up and immediately releasing the throne.

If my food did not interest their majesty, he quietly departed from the kitchen, not jumping into the throne freed for him by chance. His departure meant that we were allowed to continue our breakfast. The cat came out of the kitchen majestically, and it seemed to me that he even cried out to us, his faithful servants, with the inexpressible dignity written on his mouth.
_______ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___
Human sacrifices, I hope, you did not bring him?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №102339
 31.08.2014
[zzz] Today we had a meeting with the most important boss, where we addressed "the uncomfortable moment when your project was successful and brought a smooth profit to the company, despite all the efforts of your manager".

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №102338
 31.08.2014
Yandex today:
Save us from the evil prime minister

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №102337
 31.08.2014
My son, 4 years old, asks to buy "Winter cat". So Zack tried to figure out what kind of species this was?
I found out that these are cats that can be taken out in the winter.
We have roots.


[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №102336
 31.08.2014
Here are you, all of those who shouted here: shut down the swallows! Stop drivers with pedestrians! What did you expect in return? Will the properties and composition of urea be discussed?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №102335
 31.08.2014
This story took place in the glorious city of Kiev on June 9, 1999 (i.e. There is such a TV company STB in Ukraine. The glorious company, like everyone else, loves to spin tearful series. An old woman enters the advertising department of the television company. From the 70s to the 75s, old, but well-maintained. Asks:"where you can order advertising here".The agency's team understands the matter in shock, a light laugh is spread on the tables. They try to understand the grandmother that this is a serious matter, not just so. The grandmother does not care. In the end, it turned out that she wanted to place an advertisement in the running line, at the beginning of her favorite series. Since earlier this was proactivated, for heart-hearted serialists before their favorite film in the running line, they offer any different things, then the old lady was given a good. Everyone who was in the office, hearing that there would be 3 words in the text, was not a joke. But the text of the ordered announcement dropped everyone. The grandmother ordered:"PREPARATE FOR THE SECOND NURENBERG".The office lay... Before leaving the grandmother approached one of the responsible persons in full seriousness and asked: "And in addition to the series, what other promising programs are on your channel?".

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №102334
 31.08.2014
I learned how to enjoy studying.
You just take and enjoy.
WOW :...
It’s like rape, right?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №102333
 31.08.2014
Anna Sh. However, as practice shows, the only way not to suck in the entrances with our mentality is the death penalty.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №102332
 31.08.2014
Some people are always ashamed of their country, but for some reason they are never ashamed of themselves.

[ + 44 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №102331
 31.08.2014
They reproach Russia that the bondage law was abolished here only in 1861.

Separate toilets for blacks and whites in the U.S. existed until 1964.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №102330
 31.08.2014
Review of the film: A Bright Future. America is turned into a burnt desert. Well, in principle really bright )))

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