bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №98868
 06.06.2014
xxx: in order not to look into the small screen, took a projector, a diesel generator, a booster, columns 5.1 and a notepad. You sit and in the middle of the cemetery in an embrace with a friend of horror watching. They say I am not a romantic.
YYY: And the trail in black?
Xxx in the brown ;)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №98867
 06.06.2014
XXX: My youngest son is growing up on the fortress. And the teeth came out earlier and started to walk earlier.
yyy: It looks like he bought a premium before the creation of Persia :)))

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №98866
 06.06.2014
From the dating site, section "Who I want to find" in a single girl (author’s style saved):
1) My husband will live in my 2-storey house. The date and place of the wedding (Russian Federation) and the wedding (non-Russian Federation) have long been decided and are not subject to change. 3) the name for the child is also decided (he will be one and not soon) and the month of his birth is also specific

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98865
 06.06.2014
Hi to! It must be animated in GIF.
The fairy should go up and down a little, swinging its wings similar to the real work of the fairy.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №98864
 06.06.2014
How is the self-esteem?
Jennie: It is normal. Soup only.
What, is there a temp?
No no no no no no
What if I find? and :)
What you will find is all yours, doctor-hopper))

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №98863
 06.06.2014
Hello, are you working after work today?

[ + 27 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98862
 06.06.2014
The feeling that some of our men are hostile to us

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98861
 05.06.2014
In the elevator from the second to the third floor was a girl from the NoXX inspection and held in her hands a paper folder, which was written "Journal of registration of issue of logs of distant access."

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №98860
 05.06.2014
The BG concert.
N: We would go too. How about tickets? Only standing places?
A is UGU. Fighting with half-fooled birds.
N: Hm, well I don’t know... or myself to be these birds))))) or on the fig..
A: Well, somebody can be a bird, and somebody can drive.
N: Why do you have a wife with rights and a car as a non-woman if you are always a non-woman? Be a cat!! to

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №98859
 05.06.2014
[09:28] <Vika> Hello to everyone. Give me a password for the FTP.
[09:33] <Vika> everything worked out, admin turned over and everything went well

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №98858
 05.06.2014
XX: After viewing the "Smaug Desolation", we unanimously decided to drop Legolas on the "Turboslim", Turin on the haloperidol, and Kyle on the board.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №98857
 05.06.2014
I remembered:

My granddaughter, I took your massage, don’t you mind?
What type of massage?
Pink is like that.
– Grandma, it’s not a mass... e-ee... not against."

Flying with a friend from an Arab country, and in her hand luggage hid such a pink massage machine. On the X-ray, he was seen and the Arab border guard took out the box, opened it and began to carefully look at this object in the size and thickness of the finger, not understanding what it is and why. Asked to open, asked to turn it on, and with the question: "Is this probably a tooth massage?"" I almost pushed it into my mouth!!! I had to sneeze restrainedly, but the row of compatriots who watched this process was almost roaring in the voice. The girlfriend stood silently red like cancer all the time and was still suffocating for a long time.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №98856
 05.06.2014

Anna
I need a man.
I come and cling.


Okay, but what about our hidden lesbian inclinations?
ahahahha

Anna
Cut, and they will see.

[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98855
 05.06.2014
xxx: I would like to hear some helpful advice)))
Fly with Aeroflot aircraft.
Keep money in the savings box.
When you leave, turn off the light.
Not to hide.
Take care of
Smoking is harmful to your health.
Koi iron - count the money without leaving the box.
PS: After reading, burn, pull out the cable, squeeze the glass.

[ + 28 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98854
 05.06.2014
This freeze:

Thank you to the police who for 500 rubles reminded me that now you can not smoke in the transition.
-----------
And done correctly. The transition is a public place, in addition to poor ventilation. The smoke of one cigarette will be forced to breathe at least 30 passers, including children. But what is more important to you is what you want and what other people want to fuck.
The freedom of one person ends where the freedom of others begins. I prefer to breathe fresh air.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98853
 05.06.2014
Everyone is like this:
In order for children not to get injured, they need to be engaged, in particular, to learn to play. And if the mother is only present with the child, he will get upset. Because he, in the first place, can’t play safely, and, in the second place, thus attracts attention (which otherwise can’t get).

Explain to me, how to teach a child to play safely in a year?He needs to lay everywhere, somewhere to run, jump, catch everything.And it's okay.And you can break something yourself even falling in a flat place.And the second question - you have what, a full house?If you are urgently with the child,so that your beloved child don't let God hurt, who is cooking, washing, cleaning up?Yes, and sometimes you need to at least go to the toilet.And during this time the child has a great time to shake up.There is a feeling that you have never seen children at all.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №98852
 05.06.2014
XXX: Let me go?
yyy: later) work
XXX: So let’s go?
YYY : Okay I write the code slowly.
YYY: It’s raw and smells of baggage.

[ + 38 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98851
 05.06.2014
Here is how:

You know, you’ve been in your own Russia!
I live in Israel. In the summer, you can still wash with cold water. In winter (well, yes, +10, but the houses are not heated) you need to turn on the boiler, wait half an hour, turn on the bathroom heater, wait another 10 minutes, then you can wash. And for a long time under hot water you will not fall, because there are still family members on the turn, they also need water. And at the end of the month, you quietly shrink from the electricity bill of $ 100-200.
I come to my relatives in Russia, so twice a day in any weather I just meditate for half an hour under a hot shower, because it’s KAIF!

Of course, you don’t pay for water and electricity (two times a day). Congratulations, you are a Jew.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98850
 05.06.2014
My mother writes to me:

I go to hope from work, there bushes flowering - beautiful. I stand and photograph myself on my phone. Two young people aged 18 and 18 go and say, “Do you want to take a photo of you?” I say no, I’ll make a selfie. They began to roast! I: What, funny that aunt knows that word? They showed me a big finger and went on.)

[ + 34 - ] [8 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98849
 05.06.2014
From August, the FSB will get access to all passwords in social networks..."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
YYY: Don’t be fucking. Password requires more than one number.

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