bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №98748
 03.06.2014
Doctors note the strange desire of patients with iron deficiency anemia to eat toothpaste, mill, coal, soil, ice. The need to smell gasoline, exhaust gases, fresh printing paint, whitening is also a reason to check the hemoglobin level.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №98747
 03.06.2014
I am allergic to life. Symptoms: regular drowsiness, periodic cough and rhinitis, hair loss, aging...

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №98746
 03.06.2014
And today in the trauma point, the grandmother came to the registry and said "You know, today the nuts fell on me...". Everything turned around... "... in the sense of a tree."

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №98745
 03.06.2014
News - "Japan is building a ice wall around Fukushima-1"

Now I know where the white walkers came from.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №98744
 03.06.2014
Discussion of water heating, one of the tips on how to get hot water

The option 3:
The washing machine. No need for ha-ha. You are not a heater. Set up for 60th. We have 40 out. have enabled. Wait until the drum "wipe" begins. So the heat has reached. We insert the leake in the slide slive. We wash and turn off.
Heat the water up to 90. We go into the pond and take a bowl.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №98743
 03.06.2014
My friend and I were 12 years old when a friend’s father decided to take us fishing. Uncle Fedor is a single father and he was looking for a new mother for his son. In short, another promising madmuazelka went on a trip with us. I didn't like her - she whispered silently about some nonsense until her gaze struck the magnet. She also rotated the station for a long time, the drum, under her nose something about the "round" with the "dumb". Until I encountered a purely specific pop of the species "susimusiсюsipusi".
I still remember perfectly how the blood was poured over the neck of Fedi's uncle, a former motorcyclist and a brutal man in general, all his youth rushing through the former USSR... He barbed in front of his eyes, and we and a friend, knowing that the usual calm and balanced man, this means the extreme degree of exaggeration of the appearance - "Don't get in - I will kill," quietly pressed into the back seat of the car.
The girl didn’t notice at first, singing on the radio... But when she turned around... Imagine briefly the face of a man who was near a nuclear reactor a minute before the explosion. It was the same o-ce-pe-ni-e when a person is even afraid to blink. She quickly understood what was the cause and, judging by the scratching hand, rushed to turn off the unfortunate drum, but the spirit was not enough to even move to prevent the disaster.
It all ended well, simultaneously with the end of the song and the voice of the host - "And now it is time to release the steam and relax!"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №98742
 03.06.2014
The closer the protection of the diploma, the more temptation to finish the report with the words "The presentation you saw shows that I know how to use PowerPoint"

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №98741
 03.06.2014
In connection with the current selfie fashion, I had a persistent suspicion that some Nokia 808 Selfie Edition would soon appear (the main camera is 2MP, the front is 40MP).

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №98740
 03.06.2014
xxx: today was born beautiful, to the wrath of the day, you can say..."depressive conference"

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №98739
 03.06.2014
Sub-Moscow drug barons forced a computer to cook “branded” amphetamine.

At the site of drug production FSKN was found a computer, several appliances for heating cylinders, artificial lighting lamps, as well as industrial electronic weights and electronic timer. Control of the equipment during production was carried out with the help of a computer program that turned on and off the light, regulated the temperature, and so on. All this eventually gave the possibility to “cook” amphetamine around the clock without any human involvement.

The commentary:
It was necessary to put a scheme in the opensor, which is good to disappear.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №98738
 03.06.2014
XXX is live. In Savoie gave a card of the permanent customer
Someone has platinum mastercards by the age of 30, and I have a sabvei card.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98737
 02.06.2014
In the news "In the Urals GIBDD instead of the bobs decided to punish officials"
To go crazy, this is what kind of bonds and babies in the Ural Bobr, that they even rejected GIBDD.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №98736
 02.06.2014
As for sound – the human ear is unable to distinguish a copper audio cable of proper quality from gold.

Bro, you have set the beginning of a new mess here that will obscure everything that has been before!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №98735
 02.06.2014
I walk with my son (5 years old), around the runway, a buoy gopnik is sent straight to the road.As I thought, how would he point to the unacceptability of such behavior, the son of Wangka-"and if he pulls heavily, he will run faster?"The guy didn't even write, it seems....

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №98734
 02.06.2014
Are there self-defense courses for cats? Krishtoff came so beaten and scratched that I went to the hospital to take him all day :(
YYY: So he came from them.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №98733
 02.06.2014
Please bring to all employees that before applying to the bank for a loan, they must first call the human resources department and clarify in which company and in what position they work.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №98732
 02.06.2014
xxx: I now know what the technical part of the Cisco ASA product line marketing policy is based on.
This is Stockholm Syndrome!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №98731
 02.06.2014
My husband often goes on business trips for a long time. I wanted to give him something original so he’t miss it. I went to sexshop. Seller (P) two teachers of younger classes in retirement.
I: I need something small, travel, my husband as a gift.
Q: Now, unfortunately, we have few vaginoses, only two models, not very interesting, China...But there is a very large selection of penises. There is simple latex. Vibrant phalloimitators, anal, are with several modes, different colors and sizes. Here you look.
I: Yes, I have my husband as a gift.
Q: We have it in the gift packaging!

No scene...

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №98730
 02.06.2014
MB: an additional dimension for the broad Russian soul

I read and thought:
It is that, it turns out, in the wasted west, the soul is curved to the length of Planck, and in Russia - unfolds?
What a great space for science!

told a acquaintance. He replied that we have long been exploiting the teleport and the time machine (but for now only ahead). It works on ethanol.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №98729
 02.06.2014
Talk about hiring new employees.
I've been trying 5 years to ask the secretary. :)
YYY : YYYYYYYY? However, as soon as Zzz asked for Stepler, he immediately got it.
Tagged: life pain

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