bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91127
 15.12.2013
Romeo and Juliet (2013): Verona The Early Renaissance. A young man and a girl from conflicting families fall in love with each other. Rock doesn’t allow them to be together. Only death at the peak of a forbidden passion helps Romeo and Juliet save their love.
XXX: The description suggests that they will die of orgasm at the end of the film.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №91126
 15.12.2013
by JJ:
A 13-year-old daughter has a familiar couple in English. The acquaintance is upset. The school teacher is stupid. She asked me to check my daughter’s knowledge.

This is your book.
Translate it, I say.
It is silent.
What is this?
I do not know.
This is this. What does book mean?
I do not know.
Book is a book. And yours?
It will be yours.
It says in the notebook: This is a book.

[ + 18 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91125
 15.12.2013
Street of Lieutenant Schmidt's son in Dnepropetrovsk. On the dark side the neon is burning - "SALO TWOI OBOI". On the other - high spiritual - "CENTRAL INOC".

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №91124
 15.12.2013
I seemed to be on the wrong train and arrived in Tajikistan. Yes, I am in Moscow.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №91123
 15.12.2013
Give me a ball.
Go and take it yourself.
Maia... Well please!
and OK. Please bring me a ball first.
Of course I will bring. Top Top Top – Take it!
thank you! Here you have a ball.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №91122
 15.12.2013
to this
In Soviet times, the nodes of industrial machinery were open - insects or rodents could get into the meat-cutting machine. Now the whole process is automated, the nodes are closed - unpleasant surprises are excluded.
xxx: Can you think that this phrase could help uncover the secret of why in Soviet times the sausage was more delicious?
__________
They just hint that now the real meat in the sausage will not be able to get even by chance.

[ + 22 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91121
 15.12.2013
Probably already at home?
by Alexei:
Nothing is
But I will go.
Has the poor car in the phone gotten already?
It is fucking!! Not the poor! The fucking!!! to
Dmitry Y
by Alexei:
The car!! Not a car! Fuck the fuck.
by Dmitry:
I still have 4 hours to run the compass.
by Alexei:
The idiots are paying.)
Suffering the baby!
What a fuck!
Tagged: ears
by Alexei:
A dog and a fool
Not for and not for. Well to lose!! to
Falling and not falling!! to
by Dmitry:
Are you bullshit or are you all bullshit?
by Alexei:
The fucking android multiplies and changes the words!
I am fucking! It makes sense and does not multiply ?
Where to turn it off?
The cock! This is a cockroach!!! to
Aaaahah
by Dmitry:
I’m like a fool in the subway! People turn
Quotes are fucking!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №91120
 14.12.2013
From the report of the engineer: "The problem with the laptop of the IT director decided - the power adapter in the socket"

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №91119
 14.12.2013
Do you love girls with nick "cocktail"... this, sorry, from the word "cocktail"?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №91118
 14.12.2013
You have such a subtle sense of humor that your eyes are cut off.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №91117
 14.12.2013
Radioactive cockroaches found in northern Italy
The commentary:
xxx: I wonder, will the pseudoplastic or bloodsucker soon be found?

[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91116
 14.12.2013
Video discussion of the house.
xxx: The main coat from anthrax to the bush did not jump like my cat...
YYY: So you have a cat, and this is a rice! He is jumping from the floor!

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №91115
 14.12.2013
KRAM: Who does your website design? Cut off his hands.

Azoger: Website design is done by one of the most sought-after people-designers in DS. All the hipstamedia like posters, lemas, beigechesches and isges with them, sleeps and sees it as if it were to shuffle it. His name is Alexei Ivanovsky. So cut off something for yourself, we are just fashionable, and you are hopelessly behind.

Kram: It is clear. It is so in demand that it cannot spend too much time on design.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №91114
 14.12.2013
Why didn’t they take you?
A lot of wisdom)
Continue to))
- Let them sit at an interview with some dolboeb.This is really visible - dolboeb dolboeb. Such a dude. and spread more. And his eicker asks, type "Can you repair the rosette?" He type "never repairs but repairs, hule". And I’ll take and lick "and suddenly he’ll fire the client? In addition, usually the sockets are not repaired, but changed for new ones!".
LOL and what?
He was taken, and I am not. And now I don’t know who we are (Dubby)

[ + 20 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91113
 14.12.2013
The Anonymous Question:
I want to invite a guy to the cinema. We have been in contact with him for a long time. But I think he can refuse. How better to tell him about it?

He is:
Don’t worry, say it directly. If he has a girlfriend, then there is a chance that he will refuse. If he is poor, then there is an even greater likelihood that he will refuse. In any case, you'll be lucky, believe in yourself and everything will be fine) Just say, "Friend [Vasya], here in the movie is a cool movie [Santa Barbara], go down?"

She is:
Tell me what you pay.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №91112
 14.12.2013
It was published in the "Dictionary of Russian Math".
I study the expressions, a banner blinking above:
"Unhappy with the service? Send us your complaint..."

I just picked the words for the complaint.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №91111
 14.12.2013
If you want to gather the whole family in one place, just turn off the Wi-Fi router and wait in the room where it is located.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №91110
 14.12.2013
xxx: On the ancient Soviet chairs you begin to miss at the moment of realization that from the new-fashioned office you will collect the place of hell. And in the corridor –
YYY: Lie on the table!
The table is busy!
YYY: But you need it!
ZZZ: Stay in the shelves
XXX: What a square, I am here alone.
YYY: You can’t fit the stalls alone?
XXX: I am afraid that not.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №91109
 14.12.2013
Music concert of Paul Will "New": a phrase from the anecdote is remembered "This fool still sings!"

[ + 22 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91108
 14.12.2013
The old server in the office.
Patchwork on Serve Tom
And day and night ping tired
Everything goes around him.
On the left, the network starts.
The right to give to everyone
There are miracles, there is Linux.
Windows hanging on the compass.
on Chinese monitors.
Traces of burned pixels
The cushion is lonely.
Without windows and doors.
Technician of log errors
They are knocking in the outlet.
Cappuccino and Mother's Cappuccino
Thirty Three Evils
There were two on Friday.
Salad in the beard.
There the evil admin over the code cheats.
There the spirit of Aichi there smells of beer

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