From life on this:

X: Constantly bite at work, what to do, how to get rid of the bad?
y: Vodka in juice - knock the boss that all the beets...
Z is AGA. with the tranches. All the booze and gone.
or phenolphthalene.
Z is AGA. It is well dissolved in vodka. All the bugs, gone and outcast... But all the bugs.

-

A strange story was told in the old work (building).
One worker several times carried saliva to work, in the morning he will bring a piece of half a kilo, but will be cut off, the saliva is not... He was tired of this, and when they all gathered together, he is like this:
Have you seen the salad? I was prescribed hemorrhoids to lubricate so that I did not itch, only three times had time to lubricate and it disappeared.
Three out of five workers ran to the sortir to blew. This is how to fight rats!

Kirill: The joke is that there is a calf, who at first sits in the kitchen and tells you how her grandmother in the courtyard calls a prostitute, well and so the guy is outraged, the type of hero who calls me a prostitute.
Kirill: and then she will be sprinkled by several people for an hour and a half.
See also: Ae
See also: Fu

Sasha, did you fight with your girlfriend?
yyy: I have nothing to measure with her) she has no member (fortunately)
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

I used to envy those who were allowed to go to bed later, now they envy those who get to sleep earlier.

This is because of such questions at the interview and self-esteem decreases. You can write code that works and even works well, you will want to get a job where they want you to do the same thing you did before, but definitely someone should ask “how to get down from a square hole with only X meters round and which of them will burn faster?” Then, after an overwhelming interview, you’ll look at forums where hundreds of people argue how it’s better to solve it—through the Miclocho-McClay indexes or Freeman’s Uncertain Bubble, and you feel so insignificant—because not only don’t you know all these techniques, but you don’t even understand where and to whom all these skills can be useful.

Announcement of the sale of the car :)
I support all your suggestions that a car beaten in the back, in the front, in the left, in the right, in the bottom, rolled on the roof, flew through the fire rings under the circus dome and lay on the bottom of the Japanese Sea. The car sailed in sprinter sails 5 to 100 on the shores of California, then in Belarus carried potatoes, in the cabin smoked, drank and even mocked mat, in Russia came hit with a corpse in the trunk. Assembled from three parts, the geometry was held on a solid three (evaluation of Professor Mahmudov). Oil did not change, gasoline poured AI~76, instead of anti-freeze water from under the crane, the box pulls and sometimes even overlooks looking at the slim legs of the girls, painted out of the bottle of divorces like no, pts duplicate with stickers, the numbers are broken, it is desirable to dispose of or sell the spare parts, the salon from Priora, the engine is six-wheeled, the track presses all 100 with a screw in the shower and the salon.

The Urals proposed to move prisons outside the area and combine judo lessons with literature lessons.
The first meeting of the "Alternative Government" took place in Yekaterinburg.
WOW: The alternative government thinks even more alternately than the main government.

There was also a story related to the recipe:
There grew an immense amount of apples. I don’t know where. And then the friend tells him how he drove to his mother to the south and drank there an astonishing (in the proper sense of the word) sidr. I immediately requested his recipe. He called his mother and gave me a phone:
M is recording.
I am ready. I recorded.
Take an empty 3-liter bowl. and sterilized.
I am AGA. I recorded.
M - Then buy 1 liter of vodka.
I am OK.
2 liters of apple juice.
I understood.
M - Then mix it in a 3-liter bowl, but do not shake. Siddhartha is ready!
I am... ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

I chased here with a volvo s80, in a volvo 4 priests (in the tank met them), went out of the gas station and kicked, I followed them, went 180, then they buried me and went for the two, I stood behind. After five kilometers I look, they are standing on the side of the cover open, they are standing or they are chanting the engine, they are singing. I was crying. and ?

Once in the kindergarten I told everyone that I was a Terminator, and immediately got kneeling on the eggs from the "one-group". And in response to my screams and tears, he said with an offended voice: “You said you were a Terminator!”

by Habr

We are guaranteed freedom of speech. But freedom is not guaranteed after that word.

to this:
And I am also scared of women who have small dogs engaged in horse sports, mountain skiing, taking photos with an iPhone and making their lips clear.

When introduced dogs engaged in horse sports, skiing, with iPhones and, most importantly, making the lips clear (dogs!!!My brain went into a total reboot.

From your code, the hair of the oak got up, as long as sitting is not comfortable.

Yesterday I cooked the chicken on the bottle :D
Anastasia: the chicken was raped with three different diameters))
Anastasia: She did not fit in any of the oven
Anastasia: I baked the ugly chicken in a natural position)))

In the file, select the desired rate.
and GM. But there is only one tariff, 194 rubles. Did I read the document incorrectly?
Yes, there is only one tariff. Thank you for choosing the price of 194 rubles.

(from communication with Technopark Monopoly)

XX: How I hate the word Get Rid of It! They say it everywhere! What is stupid fashion? These pictures of fucking animals are crazy! I hate it!!! to
YYY: Get rid of it, please!

They realized the need to rename the department. Support in the "Relationship":
But technical support? Nothing works for us!! to
We also have...

In the last three years, the main sign of the New Year has not been the smell of mandarins, not the festive incentive, but the gas conflict with Ukraine. So you will hear in the news "gas, payment, Ukraine"- and you will meet the New Year soon!

to this:
People are pigs.
They came from monkeys.
The evolutionary paradox
— — —
The multiple inheritance.

One known Kazakh in Spain was named the Russian-speaking Japanese, similar to a Mexican, and also a Muslim and with a Persian name.