bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №85687
 17.08.2013
From the tea math website:

The Guaraní Indians believe that their people received a mate as a gift from the beautiful god Paya Sharuma, who turned a young girl of heavenly beauty into a matte bush and so thanked her old father for her selfless help.

I thank you very much)))))

[ + 8 - ] Comment quote №85686
 17.08.2013
Sergey: in the word winter 6 letters, and the letters are shit

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №85685
 17.08.2013
Salary of 25r. For 40 years of work, a person earns 12 million rubles. That is, spending his whole life on it... I propose for the robbery of amounts more than this to equate to the murder of a person and to life imprisonment without the right to premature.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №85684
 17.08.2013
The Russian roads are golden because stupid honest roadmen, instead of applying a nanoscale of gold, throw whole rocks into the asphalt, they are excavated by the greedy local population and they remain holes.

[ + 4 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85683
 16.08.2013
admin: and also make them run under the table and connect the compops on their own, arguing that the last imbitil will not be able to confuse the connectors

When will you learn to understand that your work needs to be done on your own? This "admin" is the deer's journey itself, if it is connected to comp users.

I am referring to the urdu who wrote the second part of the message. The eagle is you. I work in a company with a staff of 4 administrators and we deal with 1500+ users across the CIS. What do you think noble idiot, is there a possibility to walk and all connect the PC? And how many tasks per day do we perform, that is, administrative tasks that the user can really not cope with on their own? And to connect the PC you need (Oh my God) only 5 connectors that differ in color (for those who do not understand that they are also different in shape, so that you can not be confused) - power, keyboard and mouse, network and video. Home PC to connect, you will also call Sisadmin to connect or ask in the store?The TV is also scary - there are 2 entrances!! to
Our job is to make the infrastructure work in the normal mode, so that if the user has any problems with: drivers, mail, network, software - we solve them. Here is our job.
P.S Don’t be confused when you’re a boy on call – "Come to me the monitor broke (the power button is turned off)" and you’re a sitadmin. You obviously worked first.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №85682
 16.08.2013
Anna: And I went to the solo this weekend.
Anna: Photographs posted in VK
Dmitry Evon as
Dmitry: At least not alone?
I lost my virginity in Senegal.
Anna: Evan as
At least not alone?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №85681
 16.08.2013
Cyril, don’t go away! That is shit!

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85680
 16.08.2013
In addition, a citizen can be expelled from his apartment only if this housing is not the only one. If the exiled tenant has no other housing, the municipality is obliged to provide him with a new housing based on the social norm of 18 square meters. M for man.

Comrade of Lawyers! What does it get?
Thus, a family of three people, displaced from a one-bedroom apartment can quite rely on a two-bedroom, or 54 meters of utilities / shelter?

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №85679
 16.08.2013
and Denis:
thanks
and

2 lines is not zigzagging Chippolino, but just a finger jumped =)

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №85678
 16.08.2013
I sit at home, I work. The door to the balcony is opened, children’s voices are heard from the street. I hear the dialogue. The boy, judging by his voice, is four years old, stands:

I want to go to Goorkovo.

My mother jokingly cries:
I want to go to Moore.

After a moment, the boy calmly said:

Where is the sea and where is the mountain?


[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85677
 16.08.2013
On the request, I'm calling, the printer is broken)))) The applicant's name is Kolbaja Eka Kukurievna, I'm even like to turn to her not to roast xD

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №85676
 16.08.2013
I decided to try a lubricant. He shows me a tube. I ask :
Are there instructions on how to use them?
Draw and rule!
I was crying :D

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №85675
 16.08.2013
From the discussion on the legal prohibition of drugs.
I love ice cream and am happy to live in an age when people who are obese have not yet achieved its ban because they can’t curb their weaknesses!

[ + 35 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85674
 16.08.2013
My 2-year-old daughter loves to help with laundry. It will load the linen into the machine, press the buttons, remove the clean and take it to the loggia. And then the clamps and things are served while I hang them on the rope outside the window.
Today I was late for the final stage. I approach - and she did it herself: she stood up on her chicks and diligently put her clothes one by one in the window "loads out". As a mother. The rope is not visible from below.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85673
 16.08.2013
Basilisa: “When I eat, I am good; hence the conclusion: food contains kindness!”
Morphine: and this kindness is then deposited on the sides and the pope... better in the breasts) or strange kindness, straight like evil)

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №85672
 16.08.2013
I read in one forum, impressed :D
And also in the Arguments read on the last page that there is such a useful gas that relaxes the sphincters of the rectum and bladder. The delicate French used this special tool against the extremely radical demonstration of feminists; after that, the ladies quietly separated alone.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №85671
 16.08.2013
Let’s fight corruption with the system!
No, not my daddy. As the experience shows, it is much easier to fight the system with the help of corruption, rather than the opposite :(

[ + 18 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85670
 16.08.2013
Love is
I went to the gynecologist yesterday.
by 12:45:53
She gave me 3 questionnaires to fill out and there was the question of how many partners have been in the whole life?
I ask her type to answer? I-DAA

Lera
and)))
by 12:47:11
How much did you write?

Love is
I first wrote 20 (as is) and then stuck and scratched 0. But I decided that 2 was too little for me and attributed it to the beginning of 1. Shorter it looked like I first wrote 120 and then scratched 0. It is blue 😉
by 12:48:32

Lera
ahahahahahahah

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №85669
 16.08.2013
I prepared for zombie apocalypse – healed my teeth.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №85668
 16.08.2013
I decided to invite the girl to live with me.
From the morning I ran around the house, released hangers, shelves in the bathroom, in the closet...
Later she came - with a buck, a cape, a harness and a mouse for 12 dop. The key!

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