bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №75687
 11.01.2013
You are also an artist.
He: Oh... what kind of artist I am, from the word
She: I like your dog with an open mouth.
He is a cat...
She is: BL

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №75686
 11.01.2013
My husband and I were in a large zoo. The earthworms saw the same frog, which if they were to slide, the glutes would go :) She sat sad, with the look of "how you struck me, the trunks grabbed". Her husband looked at her and said:
Oh my God, how can this be wiped out? Characteristically turned away from disgust.
What the frog, apparently, imagined as my husband licked her, and also overwhelmed :D

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №75685
 11.01.2013
Xxx: Yeah, he’d fooled me out at school!
Why are you so rude with him?
Xxx: Imagine a friendly basketball match.
Xxx: We oppose another school. Goose depends on the ball.
Xxx: rotates near the " basket" of the opponents, the ball is not given to anyone
Xxx: Here is one of our orets “Isildur!! Throw in the ring!”
Yyy: blue ><
XXX is in. Everyone who was there was roasted. And Goshik suddenly cries like “Never!”
Xxx: after which he presses the ball to himself!!
Xxx: and whistling “my sweetheart”, jumping along with the ball
Yyy: guy)) it’s just genius
Xxx: We missed that match! He is disgusting!
YYY: What did you want? Should he throw a ring on the enemy?? to
Yyy: No, my Preciousness, things don’t do that, no.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №75684
 11.01.2013
Comment on the news "Gollum, Hulk and Richard Parker will fight for the Visual Effects Society Prize":
Djordji123: What if Hulk wins? And my charm. If Hulk wins, we will eat him whole.


[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №75683
 11.01.2013
I work in a building materials store with a girl named Valeria (B).
Q. Do you have a LERKA (primary tool for cutting scissors)?? to
I am Lerk!
Q. (in half a voice) Yes, I’d cut you the rod... and you go.
Valeria is completely upset, the rest who are in the subject of patchwork.))

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №75682
 11.01.2013
My wife just wrote that her son had struck a cat. The change grows.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №75681
 11.01.2013
This world is constant :)
Some people are flying on their teeth.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75680
 11.01.2013
In Switzerland, the accounts of several figurants of the Magnitsky list - officials and security officials, who in the United States are considered guilty of the death of the auditor Hermitage Capital, have been frozen.

Comments: We are waiting for an asymmetrical response from the Russian Duma... just minute by minute a ban on the purchase of Swiss watches and a story about the harm of Swiss chocolate is expected.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №75679
 11.01.2013
Have I read? In Serpukhov, police identified a textile sewing shop in which 256 Vietnamese citizens worked illegally.
The eight-bit production. It will soon be 16 bits.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №75678
 11.01.2013
xxx: At work almost over my head sits a firm engaged in hardware cosmetology, of those that help the cheeks and second beards to fight gravity. And here’s a lady who’s rooked up there, goes down and goes through a cigarette. My aunt is smoking. And the lady, passing past her, folding the sponges with a chicken goose, pictured with her hand, pushing away the invisible Spanish fly, exhales: "Fouu". Aunt carefully shakes the ashes and breaks: "Yes, your perfume is still fucking"

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №75677
 11.01.2013
Odin: From the medical website
Odin: Articles on “Dentistry”
Oral sex or does a woman need cunnilingus?
Odin: No, of course I heard something from the old Freud about the phobias about the dental vagina, but to put it straight to the section of Dentistry...

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №75676
 11.01.2013
I go to work, and on the radio they say about the actress Mila Kunis, that she's really ah-wah what. I think when I come to work I will read about it. And here I hit in the search engine Mila Kunis, only killed and behind the voice of the boss: "Yes, Kuni it is really cute" and goes away...This grief from the rust of colleagues, still in my ears...

[ + 40 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75675
 11.01.2013
XXX: The client of OOO Saturn. In the sun, 6.
YYY: Saturn is the sixth planet from the Sun. I suppose that Mercury on the Sun, 1 is...
ZZZ: The Bear Bite the Branch Bite the Raspberry, the Jurky Suslik Bite the Pearl.YYYY?
XXX: Are you still celebrating?

[ + 28 - ] [8 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75674
 11.01.2013
One thing I do not understand. When the news shows that someone has committed a crime, someone built or died, they often say this phrase "The question of initiating a criminal case" is resolved. Is it how? Why can't you immediately put a penalty on an officer who struck down a person on the transit? Why decide something? The type we want - we will excite, and we will not excite. Either they play in the stone of the paper scissor or throw a coin, arouse it or not. Although, most likely is that it is just discussing the amount of bribery for not initiating the case. If they do not agree on the price, they decide to excite. How do you explain this television phrase?? to

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №75673
 11.01.2013
When entertainment and humor sites will add to the interface the button "hide jokes about Depardieu" shob he was healthy)

[ + 24 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75672
 11.01.2013
Mr. proud > Shepard in the collector armor is like Guyver.
J@h > Who is Gaiver?
Lookikoon > who is Shepard?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №75671
 11.01.2013
The Prep:
Who are you? Give the equation!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №75670
 11.01.2013
Tuna: Now I know what it means "To put on dogs"
Did you go hunting?
No, I was in guests. They have two dogs.
I sat on the couch and they slept on me.
Tuna: I wanted to go to the toilet, and they are such nurses. I almost described myself.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №75669
 11.01.2013
Ignorance is one of the oldest forms of emotional violence.
He raped me.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №75668
 10.01.2013
Client call to specialist:

Q: Set up a program.
C: Which one?
K: I don’t know...
Q: What kind of program?
K: I do not know.
Q: What do you want to do with her?
Q: To be able to do something with photos.
Q: What to do with the photo?
Q: You are an expert, you see!
Q: There are hundreds of programs for working with photos what specifically do you want from the program?
Q: My wife heard from a friend that you can take pictures from the phone and what to do with them!

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