bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №82587
 07.06.2013
Searching for cars on websites. The description smiled:

The car is in a satisfactory condition.
Do not ask what is wrong!!! to
Beethoven just woke up.)

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №82586
 07.06.2013
Comments on Indian horror thriller about zombies:

Count of Dracula:
Zombies sing and dance.

and FoxKing:
of course.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №82585
 07.06.2013
From Chat:

xxx: Can I go here?
admin: cannot
XXX is fucking

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №82584
 07.06.2013
The patient, who went to the ambulance with complaints of pain in the penis, shocked the nurse when he the cause of this pain. As it turned out, the idiot wanted a little oral sex. He had no girlfriend, but there was a cow beside him. Duralev took off his pants and approached the animal’s mouth, and the cow slipped. It slipped so well, from the heart.

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №82583
 07.06.2013
<xxx> The world has gone mad. The menta beat the victim because he could not remember the attacker.
<yyy> It is not the world that went crazy, but the mint.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №82582
 07.06.2013
This is the wise man:

Add to neighbors with a perforator.
XX: Here you are talking a neighbor with a perforator debubal. And my neighbors in the evenings had to listen very loudly to Mikhailov, Viagra and all this non-music. I can listen to rap and dubstep drums, etc. But listening is not as tolerant as the perforator.
One evening they will hear my repertoire of real music from Hard Rock to Deskor. Enough already.

At least once, at least once, think about the fact that your neighbor is not alone! And the rest will also not be very happy to listen to your "real music".
And another important point: you are most likely to be bothered by a neighbor from above (less often on the side), and you in turn will arrange a fun time to your innocent neighbors from below and on the sides.
Be human, do not be foolish.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №82581
 07.06.2013
Saint Orlanda: I had a cat on the flies hunted and slept on the window - sunshine, all the things))) I began to turn in a dream and cuddled carefully into my bench with soap water (pedicure).
Sedit tries to get out - the taste of the shampoo is disgusting... It was ripped, blasphemed, bathed, poisoned - and he doesn't know who to offend, the face is lost...

[ + 75 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82580
 07.06.2013
What is beauty?
This is a house with two cats.

What is Close?
This is a house with three cats.

What is cleanliness?
A house without a cat.

What is emptiness?
A house where there was no cat.

by Alla Sharapova

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82579
 07.06.2013
to this:
Commentary on Distribution:

by chyvakkk91
how much this anime should be good that on the site by the number of sides crossed all the hentai?
-----------
Even if the name of Anime was written...

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №82578
 06.06.2013
From Twitter:
My father bought a ceiling luster with an MP3 player. USB under the flash. by Facepalm
So I hear the screams of the neighbors "Make the lighthouse quieter!and "

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82577
 06.06.2013
From the comments to the video, where the author turns the extender into itself and receives endless electricity:
Denis Kotov: Fuck, it is real for people to do nothing, everybody already understands that the stuff is full, and there are more and more of them every day. Why all this?
SoundExt1: You fool, I asked so all the apartment and house, and you sit and pay 3 thousand for electricity every month!
VovaNDWWW: fucking yes I so the whole neighboring microry asked! Now I have money for that!
Q: Please tell me what’s the secret? I do not succeed. Is it different which extender to take?

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №82576
 06.06.2013
Krasov: As a software developer, I draw the attention of the customer who wrote the "final TZ": when submitting the project, any phrase like "And let’s do almost so" - increases the cost of the project by at least 20%.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №82575
 06.06.2013
A comment to the vacuum cleaner in the innet store.
Pissessos is just a bomb, I have grown like an elephant, I have washed carpets with the help of the ego, the couches are now like new.After cleaning there is no dust, no dirty air.So everything is great, minus I do not see yet.
Tagged with: "pics" It is terrible to imagine this process.
Vitaly: Equipment can be used in different ways... If the customer is satisfied with the purchase, then it is good...

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82574
 06.06.2013
My five copies.
Brabus: How can I explain to my girlfriend that I wipe the monitor with her pads not because
That I am a perverse, and because it's comfortable?

___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Go and buy your own clothes in the store.
You will have your clothes, jealous of your girlfriend.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №82573
 06.06.2013
My husband and I decided to save money.
One day I said, say, stop eating shurma, money is a pity.
So now, when I call, he says, “Let’s talk home, don’t waste money.” I - "I am not spared on feelings." - "And what about my feelings about Shaurma?"

[ + 37 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82572
 06.06.2013
No Signal
Thanks to Lingvaleo, I learned that the flower from the cartoon about the mermaid turned out to be KAMBALA!

by alpha_dog
He always seemed suspicious.

No Signal
Suspicious, but not a rumble!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №82571
 06.06.2013
A friend tells me: In the days I sit in the evening, the mood is crazy, depressed, life is shit. There comes a text message, I read: "I fell from a horse, a fracture with a twist, while the bone was straightened, turned in all the unthinkable directions, when I was tired of my screams, gave anesthesia. I woke up and realized that life is so beautiful!!!". I sit in a stupor and think: and I have nothing to do, not so bad...

[ + 15 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82570
 06.06.2013
How is life? We still remember you. The Cat. by Odin. The Schröder. and Hui.

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82569
 06.06.2013
Mothers at the Children's Playground:
Are you doing loading? I also need to, I don’t lose weight... No, I can’t here, people are watching... Well, girls, can’t you get a beer right here on the bench?

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №82568
 06.06.2013
C is charged:
A 11th grade student wrote a CT on 10 out of 100. What she argued about such a low score shocked me.

How could they give me such a low assessment? They have a test with mistakes, and children suffer from it!

Did you write a mistake? You can appeal.

Of course I recorded! Here you look. In the task, you need to specify which words are written together and which words are written through the defect. One option is chicken. How did they do this test if they don’t know the rules?

I don’t understand where the mistake is.

Did you not teach it in school? “No” is always written separately. It should have been written, “Chicken is not dry!”

And what do you think is “dry” and what does it have to do with chicken?

Are you joking? The dryer is such a small bubble! I say the idiots did this test!

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna