bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №80587
 22.04.2013
Many people still prefer a good chair to a leading chair.

[ + 58 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80586
 22.04.2013
A girl with a fragile composition and a traditional lamb weight (45 kg) goes on the street. He wears glasses and is very intelligent. Well, the type can read, and behind the shelf never stood and the asphalt is not "placed".
On her shoulder was a beautiful bag. The girl slightly holds the bag with two fingers so that she doesn’t talk too much (haste).
Somewhere in the depths of the street, a young hooligan on a motif dreams of nuts and avuares from a girl’s bag. The starter presses, gains speed, catches the bag for the belt...
The girl slightly holds her fingers (she’s still a competition coach and knows how to hold on, it’s on the machine. Moreover, in the bag - snacks for the horse and promised rubber for the streams - such a value can not be given to the enemies).
The motif of inertia is carried further, then falls, and the young hooligan falls immediately, pulled out of his moving nest by two fingers of a forty-five-kilogram hammer. Because again - the girl knows how to hold the occasion and not pull out her own hand.
The curtain.

[ + 56 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80585
 22.04.2013
Children are frightened by uncles, uncles by children.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №80584
 22.04.2013
He hit his knee and asked his wife to draw a iodine grid.
It ended up with the fact that she wrote to me on the whole leg with the green "This is my husband, shit!", she said "For every case".

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80583
 22.04.2013
I decided to cook the eggs. Well I usually my eggs before cooking them. And then I thought that I would throw them in a boiler, and in boiling water the microbes would die. So he took the eggs and stood in front of a pot with boiling water and broke the eggs into the water. I do not know why I did this.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №80582
 22.04.2013
With Dirty:
Arcanacabana: I remember once helping a completely unfamiliar grandmother bring heavy bags to the apartment. She cried all the way and thanked me. And bitterly so. I still remember being uncomfortable.
Durokol: It was me. 1st semester of theatre.
pdp: yes, we didn't just give up in the first class, I don't even remember how in the bag was

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №80581
 22.04.2013
xxx: In the area of Novogirevo, something is splashing, neighbors, you don’t know what’s burning there? The smoke of the black pillar rushes...
Zzzz: I have chosen Daddy

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №80580
 22.04.2013
KVN (Pyatigorsk): Son of Elena Malysheva came to the morning in a trombus costume and stopped the chord.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №80579
 22.04.2013
I cooked the strawberries in the forest with a friend and his family. A son of a friend (6 years old) convinced to walk through the forest, "to play partisans". I took a toy machine with me for impressiveness. Let’s go, walk the trails. I explain that the partisans act secretly, mislead the enemy and discover themselves only at the last moment.

We are in a group of 7 to 8 people.
Uncle Lesh, pretend to be drunk!
I : Why?
Then they will take us for theirs!! to

Auditor

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80578
 22.04.2013
Dear advertisers, a little more and to your tanks residents of the resource will develop a persistent hostility.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80577
 22.04.2013
Son, 4 years old Ptshoyanno looks at Dad chasing in WOT.
I follow him into the garden. The scene. All children play cars and dolls. My possessed of three tanks sits one on the side, and forwarding them and imitating the shots and the roar of the engines cries out: "Not broken, the goat is broken - movement is impossible, etc". At the side of the teacher stands and with a glance full of shock observes. I think it’s time to get tanks.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №80576
 22.04.2013
Is it dangerous in Ireland? They are fighting with someone. Well these. Start with D!
The Druids?
WOW, they are the same!

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №80575
 22.04.2013
I finally understood how people appeared on earth. We were molecules that divided, divided, and then there were Jews who stopped sharing.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №80574
 22.04.2013
I watched a conversation between two grandmothers:
Here’s how many books Clava reads, not even watching TV.
You can see a sick person immediately.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №80573
 22.04.2013
The unwavering of the mind is one of the greatest treasures of wisdom.
Natasha: And the unwavering marasma is one of the strongest tools of stupidity! )))

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №80572
 22.04.2013
Looking at our favorite on Sunday "Star Wars".
The IV episode.
The man shows the weaknesses of the star of death and gives out: "Help us!"
A few seconds of stumbling, I almost moved.
And then everyone began to break up. PL _ MACHINES, BLIN ><

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №80571
 22.04.2013
From Zems

Alex, are you ever sleeping?
I shall sleep.
When are you sleeping?
Someday one day.

[ + 50 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80570
 22.04.2013
A friend drives cement in bags on his car to build his house. The Infiniti Q45.
It says that the delivery is expensive approximately 1000r\gasel. and 30 bags. He makes on his car with a 4.5-litre engine 5 runs spending on fuel 20 liters of approximately 600 rubles. and!!!! Going to wash the salon for cleaning - 1500 rubles.
How do these fools with such brilliant economic solutions make money on big houses and expensive cars???? to

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №80569
 21.04.2013
21.04.2013 00:50 Bad in settings see
14.01.2013 00:51 Natasha, I don’t even know how to do it.
April 21, 2013 at 12:52 am See you?
Loša opens your eyes and project the retina of the eye that is in front of you

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №80568
 21.04.2013
Moscow St. Southern 19 April 2013
I stood smoking on the balcony, on the street spring +23, a boy goes: shorts, t-shirts, shorts, fashionable eyewear - and here the bat glides on the ice. The milky spring.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna