bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №82547
 06.06.2013
The daughter of Masha began to capricious. His wife began to read her poem:
Masha came out on the door...
I was looking forward to the next line.
Masha shrugged her face. "I won’t go anywhere, I don’t like the garden!"
Am I the only one so spoiled?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №82546
 06.06.2013
With the years you realize that on your birthday it is important not to drink, but to eat well.

c) of O.K.

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82545
 06.06.2013
GeneralFox: A comrade’s friend appeared in the police. He bought a new Toyota, a jeep came in at the crossroads. They began to measure the pipes: who from whom the cool will call. As a result, a jeep driver's mobile phone is called by his chief (sub-colonel of the Ministry of Internal Affairs) and gives an instruction: in a black toyota at such a corner some winged, go there, if you need to fuck him knock. A minute of 10 seconds, I looked at my friend’s black toyota, then stretched out my hand and offered a beer. So we met...

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №82544
 06.06.2013
Mother is my wife! The Beatles and Psy Gangnam Style.! to
Our child is a first grade, already distinguishes on the radio Yesterday from Rocky Raccoon and says: "... here is this one from Once in America... and this is Daddy’s favorite." And when he accidentally hits Stas Mikhailov on the TV, rattles and switches to Smurfikov.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №82543
 06.06.2013
Many athletes refuse to participate in competitions organized by the United Basketball League Yaroslavl.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №82542
 06.06.2013
Following believers, authorities are asking to rename the store "Vedian Happiness"

The best comment:The next will be the requirement to rename Chertanovo?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №82541
 06.06.2013
She has no inertia at work. It is unlikely to constantly discharge passies.
WOW: Yesterday I asked her for a flash, I saw the folder "баш". It turns out that at home, she copies quotes for herself in Word, and at work she reads everything.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №82540
 06.06.2013
We have the boss Ebanulso.
xxx: in the server will be stored nork shoes now
xxx: because it's protected, there's a lot of space and the camera fucking!

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №82539
 06.06.2013
X> I work in the morning shift in the cafe, breakfast time, a small child and his mother come in.
X> I: What do you want?
X> Boy: I want to eat the unborn.
X> (the silence, all mowing and turning)
X> Mom (fooled): Eggs... Eggs he wants.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №82538
 06.06.2013
An unknown woman in Voronezh came into the house to the shepherd, separated naked and died.

By the surprising coincidence of circumstances, the shepherd was the cousin of the prosecutor of the Voronezh region.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №82537
 06.06.2013
Alexis
Can I ask if you are working or studying?

Natalia
I study

Alexis
For whom?

Natalia
Engineer-Manager...I will be a quality manager in the emergency

Alexis
Just like a violinist.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №82536
 06.06.2013
The fire started at 9.12 in the subway today, at 9.04 ended. The time machine was not injured.

[ + 42 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82535
 06.06.2013
The smoking law.
I would be just as a consistent and irreconcilable opponent of the law prohibiting shit in public places. Not because I’m a punk and crazy at the spectacle of a damned bench in the square. And only because I understand clearly: in this country, any tightening of punishment or expansion of the ban base leads only to one thing: an increase in the size of bribery. More does not lead to anything. Never and in nothing.

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82534
 06.06.2013
xxx: it turns out my mom learned about pregnancy, went to the church prayer ordered, and there she was given a commodity check that for a month tariff "save and keep" paid :)

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №82533
 06.06.2013
I list "Cars and prices".

I: What does Chery do on one page with BMW?
You will be ashamed!

[ + 28 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82532
 06.06.2013
The main rules of the Internet:
- "Everything you write can be used as shame".

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №82531
 06.06.2013
The Prosecutor General of Kazakhstan (from the news): "We have recently faced a fact. There is an attestation of the personnel of the border service, and there the members of the highest certification commission, of which I am a member, have faced one problem. The man in service is represented impeccably and his characteristics are shown very well by the command. At the same time, the polygraph tells us that he is dishonest, dishonest, inclined to lie, to manifest corruption.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №82530
 05.06.2013
Recently in Yaroslavl came a duo named Chekhov from the Kamedi. The organizer told me.
During lunch, the guys began to ask about the city, in order to prepare jokes with local color. I asked to tell you about the measure.
As a mayor, as an opposition. And here is luck - behind the neighboring table, Evgeny Robertovich is noticed as his own person, drunk in the meat.
As they say, it is better to see once.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №82529
 05.06.2013
To not be nervous xxx read poems.

XHH: Released
I guess that’s called stichomania.
Poetry, yes
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Poetry
You enter the library unpainted and pale, looking around.
WOW: and to the librarian "do you have Pushkin?"
Q: What is you specifically interested in?
WOW :
I need 1st volume of works from 1814 to 1822
But...
Give me a gun!
Don’t scream, this is a library.
Give me Pushkin, I need Pushkin! The storm clouds the sky, the winds of snow...shut up, give Pushkin!
Excellent ROFL

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №82528
 05.06.2013
Soshial is *.rar? Are you serious? 21st century in the courtyard
Do you need a nanor?

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