bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79567
 01.04.2013
Is the snow already melting in Kiev?
222: Oh, the flood has already begun.
111: Where are the pictures?
222: I will go imto after tomorrow
111: "Aftermorning" has already been removed, sloppy :P

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №79566
 01.04.2013
Talk about coursethe underwear:
She: I represent sebe. NowTheir hands shake when you hold these underwear for $300 in your hands...
He: Yes, patsat the hands trembleto hold in the hands loveand a underwear with "content" :)

[ + 28 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79565
 01.04.2013
I grind from the office's hamsters. Here they drizzle in the sweat of their pale faces. Today the poputnwith the same wind in the authosalhe a largea foreign company. I walk through the showroom like a third-party. In the field of view long's table, on it computers, behind which six managers, enthusiastically monitor events on monitorah. Besides me, three other visitors are wandering among the wonders of the automotive industry. Passes minout ten, inattention the wayis me beatingat. I shake my fingers in front of the functionalists of the manager and ask:
The tanks?
What is noticeable? -Lyzes kindly in fret.)))
- Canhave you a hintwhat? - awakenedfrom tankof battle secondof battle.
- And you fasty, and fifteen minout didn't go like you me for metl. - I hitсь - I initiativey...- but no longer need, I leave...)))
The rest of the screens and not s have cleareds.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №79564
 01.04.2013
xxx: Greetings to me comrades!
Three years later, I still disassembled the "disassemble" folder, carefully disassembling it content, or in the body.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №79563
 01.04.2013
k - client, m - manager
K: Dmitry, goodyour day, we have broken s baking, pre-trade, photo attached, waiting for an answer. thanks
m: Len, prvet. I send thebe a letter with a photo, these dolboebs in the next and once something broken's, look back and edit on the next and if everything is exactly
to: Dmitry, at buttonto Scrollto the right, and at to the left, buttonto reply.
Q: Are you working until whathour hours are you working today?
K: up to 18-00
m: youyouyou with newyou with you with you

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №79562
 01.04.2013
c derti, comments to the post about forbiddenand the sale of certain medicines in apotekah.

xxx: for ebali with his fightoy, it is easier to take cloudego than to buy Nurofen plus.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №79561
 01.04.2013
Vladimir Vladimirovich wanted to pay for the debts on the apartment and accidentally repayed all the debts of Cyprus.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79560
 01.04.2013
I watch stary movie with Jackki Changom)

comes Jackie, Kotorhe was accused of being a murdererwe, to the family of the victim (Asians), and
and grit:
I did not kill your father.
You are lying!! to
No is! If I had killed him, I would have come here!? to
* some Asian turns to the son of the murdered*
Call the police?
No is!! First we beat him!! to

) ) )
Here is! This is all the essence of the Jekian movies!

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №79559
 01.04.2013
I bought a whisky for a friend. The seller started me spin about all the subtleties, features, seven-year extension, etc. This greatego... and I just said, say, sorry. But I don’t care. This is clearly the order's gift. So I take it, pack it. I don’t understand whiskey. And she relaxed: yes. Self-driving by...

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №79558
 01.04.2013
I taught Pendoza how to correct hoppingat the quake. He nodded, said I was a chitarist and left :(

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №79557
 01.04.2013
- Wayah, here is something greenoh.
- Is it just?
and no. is lying.
Then all well.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №79556
 01.04.2013
Yesterday, the dialogue of two cockroaches around the BSMP:

xxx:Hey you missed that?
yyy:Yes, I saw 2 chicks on trainers.Around them the stick lies.I don't bite 180,
But you know it’s going to be a circus, like youngoh god can on it.
xxx:That's what you want to do.? to
yyy:(looking at the gips)No, one.(looking at the gips)It is typically a nurseand a jobet.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №79555
 01.04.2013
xxx: Tomorrow is the day of the fool. On this day, fools massively dominate normal people with their foolish jokes. yesthis is a celebration.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79554
 01.04.2013
In Cyprus with bankovsk their accounts over 100 thousand. Euro scriptout 40%.
A creditsand more than 100 thousand. Euro 40% will you write?

[ + 25 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79553
 01.04.2013
By adding a bright future to the dark past, we get a cloudy present.

[ + 48 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79552
 01.04.2013
History of St. Petersburg

One of the tasks of the young St. Petersburg police in the 18th century was to save the city of Neva from foreign embassies. The city was young, unfortified, and there were many embassies. In every foreign embassy there were some unsightly wonders.
It is not that when crossing the state border, the embassies massively went mad of the impressions provided by our homeland. Some movements in consciousness occurred.

The Swedes brought ourselves in the embassy, which began to breed. The Austrians began to counterfeit "euphemics with signs", having taken over the old stamp for checkout. The French steal horses.

In 1736, employees of the Persian embassy, located on Moika near the Green (People's) bridge, sat down to smoke. After half an hour the house burned. The flame spread at an extraordinary speed and soon encompassed many wooden buildings on the shore of Moika and the Courthouse (it is in Nevsk already). The fire lasted for eight hours and destroyed all buildings from the Green Bridge to the Church of Ascension. Only 10% of St. Petersburg's wood was burned. Many of them began searching for the evacuated Persian embassy, which had to be hidden in the monastery. Nevsky monastery had to be sanctified again. According to the results of the fire in the city of the future three revolutions for the first time introduced the state regulation of the sale of food: 16 types of goods of popular consumption - from honey to ham.

They did not have time to survive Iranian people's diplomacy, as on June 6, 1737 on the roof of the house, which stood between the palace of the Caesarean Elizabeth Petrovna and the premises occupied by the Embassy of Prussia, found a mine in the form of a pot, filled with powder and combustible materials, the pot was attached to a fire. It was not just a fire, it was a form of terrorist attack. Police and the Secret Office began to petrify the suspects. Only came out on the employee of the embassy of the King of Prussia by the name of Ranke, only began to think of how to steal him for conversation, as on July 24, the vicinity of the embassy of Prussia slammed from two ends. It was in the area of Millions. It burned to Moika, to Neva, to Tsaritsyn's lake and to the Admiralty. The diplomat has disappeared. He was later hanged in France for espionage.

Looking at the French with horses, the Austrians with a stitch, the Persians-fighters and the terrorists-Germans, the other embassies did not lag behind. The English were not behind. They shot from the windows of the embassy. Not very targeted on passers, but regularly.

Looking at the English, indigenous St. Petersburgers, children of Pskov and Novgorod settlers began to shoot in their houses.

Under crossfire from the English embassy and the households, the police ran through the city for robbers from the French embassy, following the robberies of the quiet Prussian embassy. The Persian embassy from the monastery was long requested, and it was located in tents near the Summer Garden, where it was easier to feed the ambassador's camels, who grew in Russia with additional wool. The St. Petersburgers began to withdraw firearms. They announced that "so that no one but foreign ambassadors, ambassadors and other ministers in their homes dared to shoot from any weapon, either for duty or for fun." Embassies were not forbidden to shoot from the windows - uncomfortable. But they established before the embassies the first in the history of diplomacy "clear police guard", which chased the inhabitants of the capital from the embassies.

Not having time to translate the spirit, the Embassy of Poland submitted a message: they broke the gardens in front of the residence of Count Grabienka.
The Dutch embassy brought cows. It is only a few steps from the Imperial Residence. The police had to catch the city of Russians who entered the capital without passports "to go to the capital". The captured "poor, blind, shy and wretched, with other strangers and inclined to art" were thrown on the object of the century: the drainage of swamps from the Ligovsk Canal to the Nevsky monastery for the organization of urban gardens and forests. The well-known offspring meliorator, field marshal and conqueror of Crimea Minih Burkhard Kristoforovich left for himself the calculations of the garden paradise. In order for the embassy not to mourn, the formed garden paradise began to bring rubbish from all possible places. In order not to steal from the gardens, people were brought there for residence. The inhabitants of Lygovka met with the builders of the Ligov miracle (poor, blind, miserable and artistic strangers), who had become bored for no need. The meeting was not easy. Near the gardens was built a police guard. After observing the development of events, the police attached a small prison to the guardhouse, which became for a long time the center of the League cultural life and placed some imprint on the appearance of the League resident. Then a dead man was placed in prison. And all because of some Poles with the Dutch. The entire area was built, the landscape was manually changed, the flow of the canals turned back.

The Spaniards from the windows of their embassy speculated with martyrs. Nothing but the fierce trade in martyrs and other effects of the process of martyrs' breeding and growing occurred in front of the residence of the archpastor of St. Petersburg, Jerine. The Martysches often fled their Spanish concentration camps and sought refuge in the Orthodox. The police caught the martyrs. Martyrs jumped in the yard, among the godmothers, choosing freedom. The Godmothers spread throughout Russia up-to-date information that they saw living devils in St. Petersburg. For this, the Secret Office revolved and sent them to the east.

The Embassy of Hannover recruited recruits from the unstable St. Petersburg to be sold to England and subsequently sent to the rebellious American colonies. The recruitment was carried out by cockroaches, recruits arrived on ships on their way to Hamburg. The police imposed a ban on the joint drinking of alcoholic beverages of subjects of the empire and foreigners. Drinking with foreigners could only those who had a special seal of the ober-polizmeister, so-called. “The good stamp.” It did not help very much. The Hanoverers shot off the way and tested fighters of the invisible front. Once on a ship to Hamburg awoke detective agents Mikhail Shishalakov, Ignatius Tolkachev and Mikhail Maltsov, who in the list of names of the St. Petersburg police said "literate and in Latin knows, just noise, thief and drunk." Shishalakov fled to Hamburg, then went to his own for over a year. Tolkachev went to serve on the islands of the Caribbean, then deserted to the Spaniards and his traces are lost in Cuba. Maltsov organized a dog fighting office in London and was subsequently an employee of the English police, a professional boxer, sat on chains in prison, ended his life in Italy, a librarian of Cardinal Piorizzi. I met Kazanova, who was about to move to Russia. I advised you to definitely go.

c) Gilliland

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №79551
 01.04.2013
Tell me about yourself in two words.
Everything has happened...

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №79550
 01.04.2013
and hm. I have just grasped the universal wisdom. You know, I have about the same feelings for thebe as for appendiksu. I could survive without you both, but the process of separation itself is desperate fear.
- You are hinting that I yesthis special storage non-pervertibleoh shit and only that is valuable?)
- x))) And also, in order with toband to break apart, to cometo theto kill)
Drinking a cup of tea (O)

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №79549
 01.04.2013
Vladimir: squiz rilis among films, here is your description
The young girl, Dew bossis a guy and she is angry drinking. Her seek to be kidnapped, but her handpickat comes a brigade of alcoholics: master Sanim, Ki Mu and long hairy Ki Ma, later to them joins mysterymysterymystery hairstyley from dred. They dberspan under her care and teach the techniques of dboes of Spanish art Meyut, consisting of span Thai and hip-hop dance engines...

Angry mouse: Jekichanovskego "Drunk master" no one ever plumeth.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №79548
 01.04.2013
See here. List of lots for purchases on enterpriseije, connectedije with processingije of metals by cutting:
1st Spirit rectified - 600 with excessthousands.
2nd Molchnthe products - 800 with plusthose thousands.
Three The cutting tool is 220 thousand.
And you still ask how these rockets are still flying? I will say thebe honestly: YES HUY YES KNOWYES! On the milk-alcohol mixture, no different.

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