borrowed from Slavuta Forum (Ukraine)

"Lord Jesus, in all the subjects there is your native language... a huge request to write in a understandable Russian language, or I do not understand these NIIIHHHERRRRRAA. Dear Ukrainians, if you write messages in your language then you can at least translate in Russian? I only know two languages, Russian and Russian.
- you ba moscali go out (Translation: "these Russian great guys")

More news from Europe.
Moscow officials decided to take child pornography seriously.

From the review about the tablet:"from the screen well wiped goats, still gorilla gloss"

The MSc Diploma will be a document you can be proud of. They will be in A4 format, which is much larger than the current ones. (Victor of the Garden)

Years and so 150 years ago, the fathers did not say that you can not swim without a swimsuit, not because there were no swimsuits, but because no one came to the mind to ask anything like that from the fathers.

From the reviews about "vintage" (vortex tingo):
High clearance - 190 mm, easily passed by the urban off-road.

I went home with my mother.
I: Ma, it seems that I am developing topographic cretinism... And I have something in my shoe... in my folder... in my heel! It shakes and shakes!
M: I think you’re developing cretinism at all.

sd> pipet
sd> taught the company
sd> they do not write documents on the file server, and I only learned about it two weeks later...
sd> this is what I understand "admin with nonsense not to bother"

Do you know what words he uses in the bathroom? I have begotten you, I will kill you!" Bubble is fucking!

Chat with a friend after a long break in communication:

X: Well, how about the personal front? Are there movements?

Y: Due to the complicated circumstances, I am selecting candidates for the first company of my future army of cats, with whom I will live in old age.

We sat down with our programmer today, discussed a task and suddenly he happened...
Suddenly
Uncontrolled
Preliminary
Codification

Discussion of the fire at a Brazilian nightclub:

In libraries there are windows and doors wider.
There are only blades on the pages of writers of the golden age.

...
Remember that cars sometimes have glues and brakes, resulting in a complete collapse of your system, without the possibility of restoration.

I remind all riders: when entering the pedestrian crossing, you have to press your foot on the brake, not your hand on the signal. Do not work the brakes or the brain - walk. Find a suitable wall.

Oh, how many wonderful moments we miss forever.

by Dmitry Lavrenkov

My mother-in-law’s sister became ill, and I sought to relieve her of her painful back pain by bringing her to a familiar healer 60 km from the city. Aunt Anya was released after the session, it was relieved and all the way back she calmly stumbled on the front seat of the car. Aunt woke up before entering the city and the herd insisted that she must give me money for gasoline. My complaints that I do not take money from retirees and people close to me have not been heard. Aunt Anya put 500 rubles in her pocket and, waving five hundred rubles, tried to push me into a glass on a parprise with a dirty note. I pushed her hand with the bill back into her own bag, and she tried again and again to get to the glass. Meanwhile, our car was approaching the entrance to the city, and there was a GAI post at the entrance and a brave haishnik mocked us with his "magic rod", showing the place where I should park. Here I was visited by the thought of how to get rid of the haishnik and how to calm my aunt with her gratitude. I stopped right next to the haishnik, and not where he pointed with a rod, dropped the side glass, the aunt while holding the fifty in her hand, and I removed myself from the hand with the bill as from a contagious disease said the phrase: - Commander, well, even if you explain to your grandmother that the police do not take money! Haishnik, looking at the note, then on me, then on my grandmother, then again on the note, turned on the analysis and with a mixed voice with a smile said: - No, no, we do not take! Well, I said to aunt Anna, I tell you that the hoisters do not take money, I closed the window and went, and aunt Anya was driving to the very house and was tearing her laughing to cough.

A wise woman will always let her husband walk, and a wise woman will also let her husband walk with her dog.

Kaspersky blackmailed me yesterday. Because of the slow internet, I decided to shut down the antivirus. He told me that he would break off all network connections. I had to leave him alone.

Birthday is a great way to discover all the idiotic newsletters you’re signed to for some reason and opt out of them =)

The kids are crazy :) VKontakte. Girl (D) actively engages in sex, claiming that she is 19.

D is :
Do you have a big member? Can you shave it...which would be smooth...and get into me entirely????? to

I am :
Are you a virgin?and :)

D is :
not yet

The Day of Tatiana. The evening. The office. spouses at the table.

Q: Did you drink from my cup?
I ate from your plate and slept in your bed.