bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №78627
 12.03.2013
Communication (m)alchika (7 years), (d)yavochka (6 years) and (z)nakoma who told it.

Have you watched My Little Pony?
M: No, I’ll search on the internet.

After a while:

M: Yandex and Google can’t find this cartoon.
G: Let us show you how you are looking.

A friend approached the computer and saw the query in the search engine "Prayer Pony".


[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №78626
 12.03.2013
Listen to me, Benderlooke!
XXX: What do you think if I am so on the planner on Monday, my speech will start normally?

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №78625
 12.03.2013
Ksoo: Lech, I have a virtual machine with any chip, processor loading 100%.
XXX: I added another core to you.
Ksoo: Thanks, now download 200%

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №78624
 12.03.2013
A friend told me that I was fighting in a bar with KMS about fighting and I didn’t do anything... I say well and what happened?I beat him and he climbs to embrace :)

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №78623
 12.03.2013
Lexus> and Terrano began a favorable period in an emotional state - he recovered himself and earned the rear yard!!! to
I’m very pleased with it> :D
Lexus> and may have failed to use them for a long time
Orange> ah, the broken lighthouse has not recovered?
Lexus> you know, started to heal!
Orange> should be attached
Lexus> so I took a jeep and to the traveler and even to the pine - it doesn't help =(
Lunch and coffee> :D

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №78622
 12.03.2013
I walk my trail. Here next to me pass a guy and a girl, the girl is desperately telling a story. And here I hear:
You know, he is such a man. We sit there, he breaks down, puts on his shoes and puts on the windscreen, and this is in the winter, on our question where, he answers, what a friend needs to meet and in 10 minutes will come back. He returned three days later, where he was and what he was doing, no one knows yet.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №78621
 12.03.2013
On the forum, the participant under the name Betty shares her problems and receives useful advice and words of comfort from anonymous xs.

Betty:...And here’s what he’s saying to me in the ass: Olga, I didn’t want to upset you, but I have another..."
Are you Olga or Betty?
In the morning Olga, in the night Betty, in the day bombed Vasgen - you want to live, you do not so rush!

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78620
 12.03.2013
Today at a pair of pascals at the neighboring table the girls said:
I need to find the longest word. How to do that, I don’t understand? : SSC
And you assign one symbol one centimeter.

I fell out.

[ + 67 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78619
 12.03.2013
You are young, fashionable and energetic.
All in gadgets and social networks
I am one of those people who touched.
Battles with shoes.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №78618
 12.03.2013
xxx: This is probably one of the funniest points: the Jiuhua tea plantation in Henan province hired virgins with a third-size breast to collect tea leaves with their lips and then throw them into woven baskets.
Yyy: Let me wonder, but with what lips do they collect tea?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №78617
 12.03.2013
M: I am in practice now such tasks that you need to master almost all European languages.
You will be a polyglot.
M: I’m so polyglot here, I’t polyglot...

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №78616
 12.03.2013
The Americans thought that you could just throw oil and fuck, but the Arab sorcerers think differently.

In fact, the hurricanes were also tortured by the Indians. Hurricanes are not Arabic.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №78615
 12.03.2013
I watched the news: a guy on a chopper came to his courtyard, he was blocked from 2 sides by 2 jeeps from which a fire was opened, a guy with fear tried to drop but only caught neighboring cars. As a result, the brothers went up, cut off half a car, pulled it out, stuck in a car and took it away. A few minutes later, I asked him what his name was. I checked my passport and let it go!
The Russians are awake! :)

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №78614
 12.03.2013
The sixth day of the "4 hours of sleep per day" regime, the body did not withstand and slept, ignoring the perforator.
He could be said to have slept desperately, with all his strength.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №78613
 12.03.2013
Discussion Therapy Session (Rough d'n'b Festival)

I don’t understand how people go to such concerts.
They are hardened! People under light drugs. There is even tea for 50 rubles, because there are spiders in it.
XXX: We have in the dining room, judging by the price, too.)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №78612
 12.03.2013
The wife sits with the child in a line in a children's clinic.

I come, I say, it turns out that we have another office.
I ask her who to warn us that we are leaving, so that the turn will stick.
She responds by pointing her hand to the crowd and says, “Woman with a child.”

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №78611
 12.03.2013
I needed to download the fairy tale "Candy", so on one site wrote "the book is unavailable in connection with the copyright owner's complaint."
O_O

[ + 48 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78610
 12.03.2013
@HomeRoot: Rumors say DOOM 4 action will take place on Earth. I offer John Karmak to place portals in the Russian Federation in the offices of the Sberbank and the Russian Post.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №78609
 12.03.2013
Mazzuta: in the military commands, the manuscript of doctors is interpreted in their favor.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78608
 12.03.2013
I just went to Egypt with my wife to Hurghada to rest! Naturally we got to the Eastern Bazaar, and she, like all the women, was there, then here! I searched for her for an hour, two, and in general, with the help of local police, you will find her.

When I was driving the second time, my nerves were more precious to me! Friends advised to buy children’s cheap Voxtel diet, say cheaper and angry. Well, I went to the Fresh, I bought these rations... And what do you think, they were really useful! Walked through the pyramids and again she was lost, she and her friends went wrong where I was! But this time it was not my fault, we found it quickly.

Why do people have mobile phones? Why complicate it so much? Race, police, the direct detective)))))))

Zzz: And I’m right (let it look funny sometimes). We take it often. There are no problems with roaming, and in large shops it is easier. Since my husband hates all the messy hypermarkets, he usually sits somewhere in the cafe, or goes to the departments where I am overwhelmed by thirst. So, it is very pleasant to get along.

Hhh: If you are in roaming, you will spend less money.

Qqq: I have seen a lot of such strangers (without resentment) in Ashan lately.

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