bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №53864
 24.09.2011
Fuck, you are following me! O_O
YYY: There is no fool. I read your Twitter!

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №53863
 24.09.2011
Yesterday I accidentally discovered that a neighbor’s unparalleled Waifai was catching in the toilet.
Today my mom looked at me strangely and asked if I had problems with my intestines.

[ + 57 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53862
 24.09.2011
CCHR: "Do not trust anyone. Eat them all in a row."

The Dune Worm Code, Rule No. 1 and +)

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №53861
 24.09.2011
Ahha*
and ppc)
I am in the hospital, my grandfather.
Sitting on the window, wrapped up in the garment, drinking coffee, smoking a cigarette and probably thinking about it =D
Vanilla grandfather

[ + 57 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53860
 24.09.2011
Russia is 24. Another other forum. The Speaker:

Food security affects four-thirds of Russians.

Well, I think, the man has spoken up... He continues:

One-third are inhabitants of rural areas. The remaining three-thirds of the Russians are all of us.

O_O

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №53859
 24.09.2011
Those who get up early say, “Sit down!” The couple is not finished!!" =

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №53858
 24.09.2011
Driving in a taxi, passing by the voting couple at the store "North", the taxi driver - the dispatcher: "Here in the North two people vote: a man and a woman". Director: “Not BABA, but WOMAN!” he said: “If it were a woman, I would have said so. That was Grandma. What do you think I can’t distinguish a woman from a grandmother?" =)))

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №53857
 24.09.2011
How long is your video adapter?
Where is it? 17
XXX is boy!
Zzzz: I have 19
XXX is a man!
CCC: And I have a built-in...
XXX: How built is it? What is it built on?!!! ......

[ + 59 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53856
 24.09.2011
Dear friends, relatives, neighbors, colleagues and others. Remember, only I can call my wife a fool!! to

[ + 67 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53855
 24.09.2011
xxx: my friend is not able to read in English and reads the control button like a cetrale
Thank you, you suggested me a new name for the magic.

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №53854
 24.09.2011
Yanukovych awarded Yaroslav the Wise with the Order of Yaroslav the Wise. This is the Untold)

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №53853
 24.09.2011
Sestra: In short, I am in the line for the electric ticket. Uncle in front of me. he approaches, tilt to the window with the money and says: "Baltic seven... oh, to Novogireev there and back"

[ + 50 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53852
 24.09.2011
I will soon be in Novokuznetsk for a couple of days of work. What stuff can I bring from there?
by Tripper...

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №53851
 24.09.2011
I can’t think wider...the brain is stuck in the skull.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №53850
 24.09.2011
Farret: It was in the winter, seven years ago, when I was still studying tooli at the first class of the universe, tooli at the last course of sharragi, it doesn’t matter, the point is that we and friends are very well, we noticed something and I came home late at night. Naturally, not to wake up relatives and not to burn up, I dressed up in the corridor and quietly began to dismantle the bed in the room, and when I had already dismantled it and almost slept - mother (m) entered:
M: Why did you come here, right?
I: No, I get up, I just go to the toilet.
In the hat?

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №53849
 24.09.2011
u: my uncle of the most honest rules, when he did not make a joke, he respected himself forced...
X: Without respect, he would be sick.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №53848
 24.09.2011
Man is wrong only when he thinks he is not wrong.

[ + 54 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №53847
 24.09.2011
I read several stories, including military, where the culmination of the story was a Russian spell. I want to tell you one more. In April 1942. One of our submarines operated on enemy communications near the Norwegian fjords. They drowned the transport, planned to go to the base, but exploded on a mine. The Emergency Emergency. The body flows, there is no movement, it is impossible to dive. The current relates the wounded boat to the Norwegian shores, there the Germans.
It would seem that it would only remain to shoot or surrender to captivity.
The other submarine seeker shouted down:
“I’m watching a sailing vessel.” In a few minutes: “I watch a submarine under the sailing!” What is? Submarine under a sailing vessel? Is he drunk? The commander came out on the bridge, grabbed the binoculars... Our native "Shuck", the periscope is pushed out for the entire length, it is attached to the resemblance of a sailing vessel, sewn from some blankets. In general, the crew was taken on board, and the wounded "Shuka" was captured by a torpedo. Under this "shuttle", running on the usual magnetic compass, they managed to move away from the enemy shore and cover a very decent distance. German observers saw them, but apparently took them for Norwegian fishermen on a sailing trawler. The Russian smart.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №53846
 24.09.2011
After reading in the press about the state of Luzhkov in 10 billion, and Matvienko in
3 billion, MSU graduates demanded the university leadership to open new, promising faculties: beekeeping and laser cutting.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №53845
 24.09.2011
The Tajiks painted the drum doors, which the tenants themselves put at their own expense, although no one asked them about it, painted the door eyes and then cleaned them with a solvent together with everything in the radius of half a meter... painted the batteries together with cigarette ashes, which lay between the battery plates - in general, it looks beautiful... painted the mailboxes together with the contents (capsulated inside, the box still needs to be scattered with the hands)... the elevators painted all the tablets with the rules for using the elevator, the numbers or what was there... in general, the repair was carried out in the highest order. that is. Sometimes I really wanted to catch up and tick my mouth.

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