Finochka: We have a TV hanging on the wall, 1.5 m from the floor. I thought that if the girl from the “Call” started coming out of it, she would have fallen ridiculously!

Loki is cute.
Nastya - watching video in contact, Denis plays online poker, another denis sits on a rock forum, the director - sleeps.
And in this office, I get paid for it!

In the bourgeois airport, you have to approach the crowd in the middle of the hall and shout out loudly, “Allâh, I am in the bar!”
The laughter and joy of the bourgeois around you will be your reward!! to

The cat always knows when you want to get up and falls on your knees.

I used to play in the sims when I built a house and killed people, made a healthy cemetery and then the ghosts walked there :)))

It was before I opened up for myself.

xxxx: I hear the wife in the yard with the dog talking: my little dog, my little dog, my rabbit dear... how did you sleep? Why have you eaten since morning? Has the cat eaten the cattle again?! to

Almost everyone in their friends, in the social network, has a person about whom you can say - "Fuck, who is it?and "

I am home. What should I eat?
Open the refrigerator, there is food.
I have opened. What should I eat?
Meat with potatoes in pot
I do not want
Sasha, I am at work.
Katie, I want to
What are you mocking?! to
Where is the potato meat?! to
Sasha, you are in the refrigerator!
Where is it?
Sasha, I am at work. in the gray pot, on the second shelf to the left
Oh yeah, I found it. Where is the juice?
Which one?
Katie, are you a fool? The juice!
I didn’t buy it, but you bought it.
and no. Katie, what are you?
What is?
Where is my peach juice?
In the shop.
- Well go home - buy me juice, 2 liters
Do you not squeeze?
and no. Buy me the juice... well, Katya!
and pipet. So far Sasha. I am at work.
Wait to
What else do you need from me?
I really have you crazy.
Go in the ass.
Is it true?
and yes. The Truth. Sasha, go to the ass.

xxx: Whoever put the bass recorders on the e/guitar, does it affect the sound?
YYY: Has anyone put wheels from BELAZ on a bicycle?

A resident of Bangladesh cut off the penis of a man who allegedly tried to rape her, and then brought the organ to the police as the main proof.
This is in the curry section.

At the concert:
- And now it will sound a work called "Black Es", which in translation means - black earth...

" The Black Earth??" – did we think...

My wife and I have a family balance:
Wife: Oh, you have more money on your card than I have.
I: It’s because I hardly spend, and you’re spending all your salary.
Wife: Not all of them.
I: Well two thirds.
The wife (with even greater outrage): Three!! to
I: Well, three thirds of it.

We drive a car with our husband and child, along the road of the lawn, in it the teeth swim.
Why do the teeth not drown?
Because they are shit...

Yesterday, my wife and daughter were walking in the playground. There was such a cute seven-year-old fat girl in pink panama in a flower.
There was also a big grey devis in Panama. At first we couldn’t understand what it was, but when we looked at it we realized that it was a magnet from the supermarket, so things didn’t steal)))

<sparkhost> report the situation
<sparkhost> are you still alive?
<roman> :)
<sparkhost> I don’t believe you can be a zombie
<sparkhost> 1 + 1 = 2?
<roman> No
<roman> 1+1 = 3, condoms help you
<sparkhost> personal hash adopted
<sparkhost> Welcome to the world :D

Classical phases of programming code
What did the author smoke when he wrote this? This is a fool!! to
2 the milk. I wrote that I smoked!? to
So you need to urgently fix everything!! to
The milk!! At first it was right...

narrin: 31.05 10:53 Police will distribute candy to smoking passengers electric cars :)
Wherecat: Soup the candy! Sweetened sweets, the shit!1 by @_x

Epic fail, it is when in the night before the defense, looking at the fully collected diploma, from the excess of gratitude, you hang the status in contact "Thank you all who made me a diploma", having in friends three of the five members of the commission...

The Doctor 911
Which letter is emphasized in the word "bear"?

Mastad
by "d"

The Doctor 911
Idiot

The Doctor 911
Debbie

The Doctor 911
There are two letters "D"

The Doctor 911
For what exactly?

Karamelka_v: The cousin is fooling. How to leave the dacha, it disappears. Impossible to catch. It matures the idea on the day of departure to put him on a rope. The neighbors, for example, the cat is tied. But not because he leaves, but because he goes to a neighbor who has seven or nine cats and feeds them like pigs. Well, this rope, when he was not rope, went to visit, eaten once almost before resuscitation and now limited in movements.