bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №145804
 23.10.2017
News: GIBDD cameras will record the departure from the stop line.

Comment: We would apply immediately instead of pricing.
Instead of the stop line – 800...800...800...800...
It is 1500...1500...1500...
Double continuous - deprivation... exemption... exemption

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №145803
 23.10.2017
Posts Tagged ‘Hair Care’
– is 
Service services – service services?
– is 
What do you think of “learning English”?
I wonder what and how to teach English. I can imagine the training of students, pensioners, children in English, but the learning of English is a scratch in the back of the head.

Or the advertising shield of micro-loans: “loan to salary.”
How much do they want to borrow from me?

At the toilet station:

Dear passengers!
Entrance to the toilet of the main building is paid.
The cost of 15 rubles

Cossack on Cossack!
First, just “Toilet 15 rubles”, apparently, is not enough pathos.
Secondly, the cost of payment purely formally is the cost of payment, not the use of the toilet. That is, the commission from the payment for the toilet.
Third, railway passengers have the right to use the toilets at the station absolutely free of charge!
Paphos and lawlessness.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №145802
 23.10.2017
12:06:14 [ZoomY] spinnker> I have probably not spoken this phrase so frankly, from the heart, really, from the depths of my soul, for five or six years.

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №145801
 23.10.2017
Have you ever seen the map of the world at least once in your life? India and the UK not only do not have common borders, they are also in different parts of the world.
............
Like the United States, Canada, Australia and New Zealand, as well as a couple of dozens of territories smaller. However, they were all part of the British Empire. Did you teach history at school?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №145800
 23.10.2017
In the apartment, in which besides you and your spouse, live 3 children aged from 14 years to 4 months, it is really a problem to have sex. Because one of the children at any time is at home, and when they are all sleeping, their eyes are already clamped, just because of their age.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №145799
 23.10.2017
gt, "In Darknet you can buy software for unlimited withdrawal of cash from ATMs"

xxx: I offer a ransom: to rob a ATM with the help of a program purchased on a loan issued in this bank.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №145798
 23.10.2017
Keyten: Well
Keyten: Your girlfriend is potentially someone you need to love, care for and live with for a lifetime.
Almost like a dog.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №145797
 22.10.2017
Here is the first snow (Photo)
Why so small?
He just appeared a little before the deadline.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №145796
 22.10.2017
XXX is:
OMZ bought a simka with a direct city.
Previously, this number belonged to the T-Dam. Girls on the challenge.

During the day, everything is awkward, but at night you have to turn off, customers call on the old memory.

Although, Imho, could have agreed with somebody and put a redirect for the night.

YYY :
Buy a beginner prostitute.
Advertising is worth money.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №145795
 22.10.2017
xxx: But with the games is not the same situation as with the movies, conditionally some Titanic of 1997 looks and now great, but here HL1 1998 or even the first Silenh Hill of 1999 now look gently so to themselves.
YYY: I do not have to! Compare DiCaprio in Jango and Titanic! In Titanic, he has a maximum of two or three polygons on the whole face, no wrinkles to see, all some smooth, like a plastic doll.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №145794
 22.10.2017
Mexmed is:
Advertising: "From Vnukovo to the Northern Ural! This is the weekend!"))

Mexmed is:
"For a weekend in Vorkuta! Unforgettable active rest and comfortable double room!"

by ATTA:
I was a sister.
Cut the cat.
I go to children's camp.
in the city of Vorkuta

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №145793
 22.10.2017
In hell, intellectuals will be given new high-tech protection against heat and sulfur every day.
But it will only be compatible with yesterday's boiler.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №145792
 22.10.2017
The Regular Eye

I am angry with the boss.
The proletarian fuck his lodge.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №145791
 22.10.2017
As our Finnish director says: "Hero margin is still better than the Morzher.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №145790
 22.10.2017
Tomorrow in the morning?
I don’t know, I’ll jump back.
I will wait for you.
Hachiko
touched

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №145789
 22.10.2017
The Regular Eye

I will go to Bali.
The waking ones.

Or the right ball.
Because they woke up?

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №145788
 22.10.2017
Oh, the sex shop moved, and I never had the time to go in! And how intriguing was the announcement on the opaque (in the heart) door: "Conservatives - NO CHARGE!". Imagination drew the line of the suffering - who behind the vibrator, who behind the rubber lady, and who is behind the cloth and the bracelets, - and here I break up with a scream: "I only have condoms!" And all of these are -"Yes, you are right"...

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №145787
 22.10.2017
I’ve been tricked to buy two identical versions of Harry Potter. One is Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone, the other is Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.
The third part is Harry Potter and the Kidney Stone.
Harry Potter and the Rolling Stone. They fly there with Jagger and Richard on the butterflies at night. Smoking up, of course.
4: And Voland-de-Mort is on fire there.
“Harry Potter and Stoned Rolling Stones.”

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №145786
 22.10.2017
The xxx:
And now you review yourself and ask yourself: do you trust me? I will write you a receipt that I promise to return you $20'000'000 if you give me $1'000'000. But killing you and all your heirs is cheaper than fulfilling your obligations. Disappearing from the country is even cheaper. If it were an obligation to the state, it could have stopped me at the border, committed various unnecessities with me, and possibly returned a part of the capital. And you? Try to touch your finger!
So what? Do you transfer money through a bank cell or immediately by tax?

YYYY :
Of course I do not trust you. You even have a reputation below zero.

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №145785
 22.10.2017
When I was just over 20, I had to live in the raion, the apartment in the panel was removed. One cold winter morning I went out early to warm up the car and clean the snow. Morning, winter, cold, frost -10-15 A couple of such drunk-blind local residents go by, he and she, both aged 50-60, already drunk (7 am! ) is Both swimming, she has blue eyes on both. They argue, they don’t share. At some point, a man knocks his grandmother in the ear. She falls on her back and no longer moves... The man quietly leaves.

I stand, what do I do? I don’t want to get in touch with this drunk. But the grandmother lies on the snow, does not move, maybe the pebble has thrown away, and if not, it will freeze.

I approach her, I look at her eyes as if opened, lying in the sky looking. I say :

A woman, a woman! How about self-esteem?

Continuing to lie, she focuses on me with a dim look, looks at me, then barely stands up and answers, shaking:

I do not meet in the street. - and while I was shaking from such a turn, he adds: - You are still green, it may be hard to believe, but I am long over thirty!

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