She: How is it? There is no hot water in the house for two weeks, and you have a clean head?
He: I don’t use it.

Requirements for the candidate:
The enthusiasm...

The abyss rolls! I read every day and today caught myself on the thought that the abyss replaces the news: all the most relevant topics here. And about the bats in Saa and about the new rules of Russian language...

Often you understand a woman without words, you almost understand half a word and you do not understand when she speaks.

The National Question or the Mouth of the Baby

As usual, the preamble. The fact is that in Estonia many officials, when they have to speak in front of the Russian-speaking public completely forget the Russian language, and in order to understand them, use the services of "six" translators. Well even though! After all, the President of Estonia himself said at a press conference that speaking in Russian means recognizing the occupation of Estonia by Russia.
So, my son came back from school on September 1st all satisfied and told the following story. A district elder was invited to the solemn line to the Russian gymnasium. He gave a speech in Estonian without a microphone and quite unclear. After that, the assistant present in the vicinity translated everything he said into the microphone. After that, dozens of first-class students ran to give flowers. Guess who got all the boxes? The translator...

The inspector addresses the driver:
Sorry, you couldn’t park your car somewhere.
In another place? I know this will cause you some inconvenience.
Please enter into my position. The point is, here is the
It is a good place for me to watch the crossroads.
And, seeing the amazed face of the leader, he adds:
to translate?

She: Where was she missing?
He: I have a son.
She: Oh yeah, how old are you?

The world-famous psychologist Alan Pease said:

The real idiot in terms of sign language is George Bush. When he became President of the United States, his first official trip was to South America. He descends from the airplane, smiles and shows with both hands “the goat” (a compressed fist with a folded index finger and little finger). and PRIM. The Aut.) Because in North America it means “happiness.” And in Brazil, where he arrived, it means "you are a coronarian, and everyone sleeps with your wife." And here the Brazilians begin to whisper - they whisper someone, it means sending him somewhere away. In the United States, people whisper when they like something. And here, Bush goes down the stairs, holds two "goats", the Brazilians whisper, saying to him "you there," and he, pleased, nods his head and shows a gesture - "thank you."

I went to America in the summer. I went to a bookstore looking for books that interest me. Here my eyes fall to the Russian speaker. I open, there is a dialogue described in the bookstore (Seller and Client):
Q: Is this a bookstore?
Q: Yes, what would you want?
Then the client asks about a book, buys it.
K: Oh yes. Do you have vodka?
P: of course. Do you need a large or a small bottle?
Q: Please give a small one for my sister and a big one for me.
P is OK. Something else?
Q: Do you have white wine?
P: No, it is over now. Will bring next week.
K: Thank you and goodbye.
My brother and I spent 30 minutes.

The survey:
Why don’t you get along with girls?
3% I am shy
5% I don’t know.
10% are very busy.
82% I am an Elf 80 level

I sit behind the comp and think about sitting still or going to clean my shoes. Here in Ashka comes a message from a friend who lives quite far away:

<Victor> is clean!
<microz> what is it?
<Victor> sorry, not there :)

Five minutes of shock.

Re: The worst act

Kol2000: Having sex in a nightclub with a great dating, then (long ago) it seemed super dupe

I-one: I had sex with a girl in the car on the go she sat on me and driven and I switched speed and pedals controlled, and on the back seat slept in a fucking drunk her boyfriend - a boxer)))))

Oldman: The car was not a green eye by chance?

Are you not a boxer?

Father is a director of a large company, with great connections and an international image. She sat in their office, laying at him in the compass. I came across the ass, a letter with a slide:
Father: Hey you, the deer. A beer duo!
ZAM: I will not go.
Oh, and you are wicked!
A: You will not be fired.
A: This is why?
A: And you love me :)
A: Oh, and you will not object...
A: You mean to love. Get my salary?by m?
A: If I raise your salary twice a month, I fear the rest will suspect that there is something between us :)
C: You won’t get up, I’ll say I’m your mistress.
A: Of course, everyone has a mistress as a mistress, and I, Stsuko, Sergey Nikolaevich.
Hdd, get married to me!
A: I went to oppa, I love my wife!
A: From the soot! The economist sent for a beer, but he persuaded the buffalo to sit down, the lazy became, she sent the courier, and he persuaded the guard to drive away))))
Fuck, the sheep are lazy! Better to sit!

This is... business negotiations.

Deciding to prove the theory of probability, the prede took a coin and threw out five eagles in a row. He grabbed, and with the words "well you understood the principle" returned the coin.

Opera 10 has fulfilled a childhood dream!! The images on the site start to open from below! Truth is no longer necessary.

In response to the statement of the Ministry of Internal Affairs of the Russian Federation that the so-called “sound drugs” are a new type of fraud, the creators of the “sound drugs” stated that in fact the fraud is the so-called Ministry of Internal Affairs of the Russian Federation.

According to them, in the Russian segment of the Internet began to appear information about the so-called Ministry of Internal Affairs of the Russian Federation, allegedly influencing the criminal situation in the country.

According to experts, it is impossible to the advertised effect through the Ministry of Internal Affairs of the Russian Federation, the authors of the “sound drugs” argue.

And the only result of the use of the so-called Ministry of Internal Affairs of the Russian Federation are headaches, partial loss of memory and decreased brain activity, the authors of sound drugs emphasized. by VIT CENEV

Once my mother’s story is over, I’ll write more.
It was also at the dawn of my departure.

My friend and I admin the district network and we are called by a firm, they don't have a net, everything is distributed through the Linux server and the right on the desktops are cut off at the very least. During the play, it turns out that their admin is in the hospital.
We call him to find out the admin password, then my friend's conversation with admin:
I need an admin password, I need an admin password.
From the ISS!! to
(Well, the connector should have seen my friend’s face, but he takes himself in his hands and goes on.)
- Sorry, I understand, of course, you are in the hospital, and you are very ill, but here people work, they need access to the internet, the situation is critical, the director personally asks you very much...
In English with Russian letters!!!! to

Imagine living in the 1960s, never using a computer or hearing anything about it. Have you presented? ) Now read these phrases slowly, thinking about the meaning:

"I’m going to be a friend"
"Shooted on the soap"
"The movie weighs (!) 100 meters and 400 meters"
"Pleased the page down"
And finally, "Drop the music on the wall".

Strange things does this 40-year-old man called the Internet =)

by Nietzsche. It will be 09:09:09 09/09/09
On that day, at this time, I will come to Peter's Deviattino metro station and drink nine bottles of Baltic Nine.

Some people think that if they have breasts, they can do anything.