to this:

The wild beetle who attacked people in China was the victim of an 83-year-old grandmother, reports on Thursday the news service "Zhongo van".
An unequal fight occurred last Sunday in the suburbs of Chongqing metropolis. A wild cock weighing 107 kilograms stumbled from the bushes on the old lady Hu Chengjeng when she peacefully burned the garden.
Armed only with a knife, the elderly woman managed to cope with the wild beast within minutes.
Grandma Hu herself managed to cope with a slight scare and a few scratches.

I think this is the same grandmother from "Madagascar":D

xxx: We had such a heat lately that I finally couldn’t stand it and put the air conditioner at home. And you know, it helped – from the next day the rains began, it became cooler.

I lived in Vietnam for 7 years.
Did you see Rambo?

Conversation of the Director-General with the Head of Staff:
GD: Fedor, I have invented a new system of motivation in our office:
We’ll let the employees climb, and when it’s necessary to press, I’ll report that I’ve been aware of the machinations all this time and that it can end up in trouble.
OK: Yes, but this way you can lose the authority and respect of the collective and it can have negative consequences.
GD: Then you’ll be blackmailing Fedor.
Okay what? No, I can’t, I’m the head of staff. People see in me support and support, no, I can’t.
G.D.: And who of us pulls a pack of paper home a month, and 1C on a flash drive?! to

Gabe Neill claims the best body

Victoria's Secret, the most famous manufacturer of women's underwear on the planet, launched a customer competition for the best body and, surprisingly, it did not go without familiar faces. Right now, the third line in the vote is firmly held by Gabe Neill.

Someone sent a photo of Valve director, which provoked a flash mob. Right now, 11 and a half thousand people voted for Gabe (and I included, what was there). If Gabe wins, he will get a three-day tour of New York’s beauty salons.

When your work seems unnecessary and meaningless, remember the builders of the Egyptian pyramids.

I decided somehow to find a new way to lose weight, for which I bought a whole pack of tea in the pharmacy with the romantic name "Flying Lemon". I first realized that after this tea you lose weight and fly, this careless bird.
It all turned out to be much more prosaic. The experiment began on Monday morning after coming to work. In the instructions was written "One pack for half a liter of water." Why I didn't be alert at the time of reading the instructions written in such a language - it's hard to say, I probably wanted to feel a lump faster.
Having decided that I would not drink half a liter at a time, I decided to increase my concentration and asked the secretary (Olu) to make me "a cup of this new tea, which I brought this morning."
Fifteen minutes after I had the bitter taste of the new drink, I was flying around the hallway, holding my arms to my back, with one thought: “Just get the time.” Why I wasn’t broken down while I was running, I can’t understand yet.
The rest of the day passed like a puddle. In short flights, like in advertising.
“Let the world wait.” Only from the advertisement it was distinguished by the complete absence of any romance.

In general, Zateya failed at the initial stage... But the main thing was to go further... After a short depression, I pushed the box of tea onto the most distant shelf of the Oline Tea Wardrobe and safely forgot about it.

Three months have passed. There was another meeting in the cabinet on a mega-important issue. The urgency was such that the meeting was held in the form of "Until the issue is resolved, damn who will leave the cabinet!“”
Three hours passed, during this time they had time to scandalize, to reconcile, but no consensus was reached. To make people feel the weight of the three-hour marathon, which promised to last, I picked up the phone and said:
“Ola, we have three teas and I have coffee.” With this phrase I predetermined the outcome of the meeting and predetermined the fate of the people present for the rest of the day.
After 15 minutes, people began somehow unnaturally shaking and quietly standing. Ivanovic asked to smoke.
Smoke here! I said it firmly and put a ashes bar in front of him.
“No, I’m sorry, I’m not used to the cabinet,” Ivanovich beat.
He smoked in his office two packs a day and jumped out.
The office turned the chair.
Following him for 5 minutes to smoke jumped out and the rest, which I was very surprised, because I knew they did not smoke.
20 minutes passed... No one came... It started to seem disrespectful... I went out into the hallway and went to the smoking room to put things in order and find out why they didn’t want to continue the meeting.
In the corridor, I saw Ivanych appear from the toilet door, he stopped at the threshold for a moment, but then stretched out his arms with a stone and rushed back, like a bird, which suddenly found long-awaited freedom.
I almost ran into my office, and with a stunned voice asked the secretary to give me a box of “this new tea with a bird on the box”... With fear I raised the cover.
For two months after that, the staff refused to drink anything and ate in my office. And Ivanovic even drank vodka with suspicion.

One man says to another:
I have a son born!! My son!! After my six daughters.
My son is finally born!!! to
Who is more like you or your wife?
I don’t know, I haven’t looked at her face yet.

Annaelle: I seem to have earned.
Annaelle: I have a refrigerator with a top freezer and a microwave on it.
Annaelle: Yesterday I came back from work, I think I’m going to the stove now. I put food-open the freezer-storage food in the freezer-closing the freezer- turn on the microwave-cleaning-the microwave shake, type everything is ready-I came calmly got food from the freezer and went to the room - get hot to eat

Yesterday I made a mask of blue clay, smashed her whole body, so my husband ran after me all night and spoke that he wanted sex with a strawberry.

Dear pirates! And you could not shoot the screen with the trailers. Hunting for news.

From the ASK:

**** (15:21:36 13/08/2009)
We are funny in the yard.
Matt made a parking.
Another Mint has arrived.
Police call for illegal parking.
A short on him.
Our local mind is on him.

They understand

and the phrase star "go pursuit we will take and talk like a man to a man".

It was a long time ago, at the dawn of my departure.
I sit in the room with my mom.
I am called by a partner at work, well, and we begin to discuss the problems of the network, tracery pings broadcast packages, fluid, dismal.
In order not to be distracted from the comp, I turned on the speaker, well, of course, the partner misses a couple of maternal expressions, which I warn him, say you are more careful, I have a speaker, and here is my mom nearby.
Mom from the other end of the room: “Yes, that’s the only word I understand!and "

It is blue! Well, why in modern washing machines there is no button "Stop washing immediately! There is a cat!!!" and (

A friend told me:

- we decided to go to the cinema, well, how it goes, the curls tightly before this matter and the fun drowned.
Go to the cinema in front of it is a metal detector and next to it the brutal appearance of the guard, the guard stands proudly, hands behind his back folded...right to the railroad.

And then my friend approaches the guard and without unnecessary conversations begins to show the contents of the backpack, pockets.

What the guard, looking directly into his eyes and not making unnecessary movements, with feeling, feeling and arrangement, gives out:

Do you consider yourself suspicious?

My friend hanged for 2 minutes and we ran in hysteria))

The double feeling covers when your favorite shirt is small in the chest area.

The best gift is a gift made with your own lips.

Dear employees of the police, working in the department in front of the Kursk station, you had a man lying, almost before the entrance of this dirty station, with the head pierced (not a bomb), I tried to get the movement from you within half an hour (and no fool, if there is a department of the police nearby I should not call 02), so here, you are fools, because I have never seen if you helped him (who was smoking, who was doing his references) shorter... fools you, I hope you are reading this and a few decent of you will put a puzzle to the whole department of Kursk. With respect.

I: - And I made ice cream camouflage color. And no one appreciated it (
Red is not found?

HuKTO The Exile
He went to drink coffee.

HuKTO The Exile
Blade

HuKTO The Exile
Cappuccino included

HuKTO The Exile
Thou shalt

HuKTO The Exile
and blonde

fanmaxpixpam
Blonde

HuKTO The Exile
by Scuco! It turns out when you write with capsa feelings for...excellence what?...no that kind of...
Fuck it!!Here’s why the blondes write capsome!!!The scuts...

HuKTO The Exile
All the fucking. Again the muzzle!

fanmaxpixpam
The Eighth of Eighth!! King of Peace!! to

fanmaxpixpam
Exact feeling of superiority T_T