"Return to the Employer in good condition"

These jurisdictions. How to worship a lawyer who does not own a lawyereese citizen - so out of you how much. And how to write a clause on the Wada in the Hague court (they were quite shrnened - to allow cocaine to theirs, and ours - to shut down for drops of cold) - so no lawyer.

(C)Porto with Geektimes

To get out of the comfort zone, you must first enter the comfort zone. We don’t have enough money!” :D

Mracopedia, a guide to survival.

16 is Do not rely on holy water. Get a strong cloth with sulfuric acid, go to the church and ask to be sanctified.

17th Sintoist priests cleanse rooms from ghosts, waving katanas. This ritual is 100% effective against beings endowed with flesh.

Yesterday in Nevsky, two elderly men walking behind me, first long and positively discussed about grace, and then about how cool it would be to squeeze on some window. Moreover, in some wonderful way, the second theme follows quite logically from the first.

may
I always felt that I was surrounded by very sensible people. Until now, one of my acquaintances, a twenty-five-year-old girl, did not seriously ask if it was possible to get pregnant if she was already pregnant. I did not even know what to answer...
Such cases are recorded. Give it up.

>> Strange looks a piece of blue insulator on the eye of his MacBook video camera

I don’t want to scare anyone, but when “Google” was accused of listening to users, they were scared by just waiting for “Okay Google.” With a video camera, I think the patch would be that they read the iris of the eye to prevent unauthorized access.

Missanthropic girl acquainted - a full guard. She went to law school and was horrified by the instructor. For me, it looks like the hell of a misanthrope - it's in a completely blocked car with a mating instructor and a stunned engine in the middle of the crossroads. In a beige shock.

What did you write? Shine through the letter “e”, shoes through the letter “e”. What are you easy? Listen to me, the lightweight. There are many words in Russian, there are many. When you compose them together, you get a proposal where there is a narrative, subject and other shadow. And all this is the great Russian language, Easy. Did you understand me?! to
That is true, Comrade Commander!
We have a great Russian language. In it stop the place name, speechable and subject, and an intonation will appear!“Our Masha cries bitterly,” or “Our Masha cries bitterly.” Do you understand?This is poetry, this is poetry, this is the poetry, this is the poetry, this is the poetry! And there are generally sentences in one word: “Mrosit”, “Dinner”, “Smelt”... Do you feel?
That is true, Comrade Commander!
You don’t feel fucking! When I read what you wrote, I’m itching in the most humble places! You can break the member right away until you get to the end of the paragraph! Who taught you?
In the school.
Show me, and I’ll break it like a hot tub.
I say in school.
Have I studied abroad?! to
If I were like that in school! Income is! I would...
Freely...

I am at work, admin. Behind the wall, the findirector and the head of the company are loudly and emotionally discussing the price of the transition to the new version 1c.
They clearly divorce us for money!! I looked at the contract - there even a slide marked "a thick customer"!!! to

Unfortunately, in order for the child to say so, it is necessary that he has already seen it. He doesn’t know that he can beat his mother.
and
You probably do not have children. From anywhere the child could take this and apply it to the situation, for example, dad said to him, when you are offended in the kindergarten, you do not say anything, approach and immediately be. Or he could have seen on TV how the ‘good’ beat the bad. Or in a computer game played and someone (papa, mom, friend) said " approach him and be". There are millions of options, and not all are bad. If he saw his dad beating his mom, he’t ask for it—either because it’s happening, why ask, or because it looks awful.

One day my best friend decided to go on a diet. Well, you know this classic diet: in the morning black coffee and toast, for lunch chicken breasts without salt and salad leaves. And since we rented the apartment together, I was forced to sit on that diet. for the support. For the third day, I lie without strength on the couch and say:

I feel like I have super abilities. Especially the super smell. Here I hear on the 2nd floor in the apartment number 40 cooking soup. of beef. Probably with a housekeeper. What a delicious.

In fact, I just opened the cat’s canned food. I feel like they have to be hidden from you.

In the cave of the Vilnius Church of the Holy Spirit rest the remains of 600 citizens: representatives of the clergy, nobility and middle class. In 2011, Lithuanian anthropologists began to investigate the surviving bodies and among them found a partially mummified body of a 2-4-year-old child of unknown sex.
YYY: Per not a certain gender?

Microsoft has admitted that after the update some users lose access to the Internet. They are advised to do the following: restart. If it didn’t help, go to their website to solve the problem.

Carpet, carpet, carpet, carpet, carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet, carpet carpet,

The self-suicide

I work as a sysadmin in production. I have a Commercial Director (D).
In the weekend we plan to transfer everyone to a new mail server, the old is terribly dumb.
Call from D

D: We have everything bad in the Fed, the mail is shit.
I: Let us put it on Saturday and open it all new.
D: I need time.
I: Well okay, each of your employees will be fired for an hour because of the comp.
D is NO! They don’t write to me and don’t cheat. Do it at night.
I am OK...
Q: Why is it still not working?! to
I: Because I was asked at night...
D: I need to be happy!
I: So I bet on everyone?
D: They cannot be distracted.

I’m a carousel like this.)

We sit down with a loved one (we have three children for two, this is important), we drink coffee, we watch the clip.
When he saw it, he asked:
Why do girls always have smaller cars than boys?
“So from life is an example,” I answer, “your car is also bigger than mine?
Once in two...
Your house is bigger than mine.
Once in two...
You weigh more than me.
Once in two!
You have twice as many children as me.
And it is true.

I usually walk in contact lenses, and then something got into the eye, he got slightly inflamed, the doctor told me to go on glasses for a week.

In the morning (approximately five or nine), I go to the office. A colleague who also walks in lenses immediately reacts:

What, the eyes of lack of sleep do not open to the full width?! to

Employees of Eldorado are discounted for the New Year corporate for 1999 rubles.

Don’t be sad, comrade
We have a way out.
Out of my ass.
In the light toilet.

Yes, simply "mysantrop" - the word is beautiful, and no matter what it means - its presence will adorn any text. As well as "oligofren", for example...

"And Ellochka looked at Fima Dog with respect. Madmuazel Dog was heard as a cultural girl — in her dictionary there were about one hundred and eighty words. At the same time, she knew one word that Elloche could not even dream of. It was a rich word — homosexuality."

I am dead by documents.
You have to pay the property tax, lol.
I will declare my house a cemetery.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXX: places on the cemetery to a quarter of the lama before stood
xxx: you can allocate thirty meters under the storage
Neighbors from below will be pleased.
xxx: buried in the floor for six feet
Let the neighbors understand.
XX: We have done our part of the type
zzz: and to the pretext to answer "What hule did you settle under the cemetery?"