Example of dialogue with the client:
*xx - cannot copy documents into a folder*
YYY: Are you sure you have access to this folder?
I am Aragorn. The son of Arador, the heir of Isildur, the descendant of Argonue, the descendant of Arasuil, the descendant of Aravorna, the descendant of Aragost, the descendant of Arahada I, the descendant of Araglas, the descendant of Aranthael, the descendant of Aranuir, the descendant of Arugil, the descendant of Arafat, the descendant of Arafat... (the list of all and all).
YYY: Are you sure you logged in under your account?
XX: Of course, look here... oh sorry, I didn’t come in.

Americans, feeling sad, angry or anxious after Trump’s victory, hanged on the walls of the New York subway colourful notes of the following content: “I need someone to embrace me”, “Am I alone in fear?”, “God will help us” or simply “Tomorrow will be better.” It is a kind of original collective psychotherapy.

The initiator of this campaign was New York psychotherapist Matthew Chavez. On November 10, at the time when citizens began to go out to the streets to express their disagreement, a young man hanged on the wall of the subway the first 15 notes with the letters "V Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y". Within 24 hours, the Americans had already hanged 3,000 notes.

Vladyan: In Jerusalem there is the Wall of Cry, in New York, therefore, there has been a wall of grinding.

From a dialogue with a friend, discussed with her birth (born in the same nursery):

I: - I'm going to bear, I'm giving birth, I mean, the head of my son. A husband, a midwife and a doctor are actively involved in the process. At this point, an aunt from the medical staff enters the nursery with a bowl full of food, and says, "And now it's time to eat! Here we have strawberries, soups, cakes, potatoes, all hot and fresh! I’ll go out and I’ll say, maybe later. It will cool, it will not taste good. Let her husband eat it! The pale man responds with his head. She is so upset: "Well, let it stand near then".
P: It is nothing. When I was giving birth, I was given an epidural (epidural anesthesia), carried out a cesarean section, pulled out the baby and taken to weigh. I lie down, therefore, cut, underneath the titles and hands I feel nothing, with the feeling that all the intestines are out. And then in the chamber comes to me also a aunt from the medical staff and terribly asks: "You will vote???". I, hardly remembering that today is election day, replied to her: "Of course I will! Weather, just after the passport to the chamber I go and come". The aunt condemned as a hole slang, and proudly departed.

How do you like to give birth? ?

Fuck, I don’t understand that. If I tell you how my father licked me as a child, it is nostalgia, childhood is a wonderful time, but he grew up as a man, a beautiful Soviet education, they went on with their youth.
Oh yeah yeah, right.
xxxh: but it is only worth to say that I raise my children as necessary with a belt, then immediately I am a goat, call a social care provider, children's brain and psychic trauma is guaranteed, as my hands did not dry.
You are a fucking shit.

Oil: I sell a shirt for 300€
Alexander: Does Norka know you are selling her coat?

<timur> Does the field knife have a bloodshed?
<lam-tam> Of course, the field is burning. He has a bloodshed, and a bloodshed, and a bloodshed.

Good news: my gas leak sensor is working
Bad news: My gas leak sensor worked

The best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago. The next best time is today".

The best time to plant a tree is April-May. September-November before the frost.

All my experience of work (ten years, plus a couple of years of student work) literally screams about one thing: in Russian reality, the more in the office they talk about "corporate culture", "compliance with corporate norms" and other "values", the less likely they are to observe elementary ethics. Probably because an employer who treats employees normally doesn’t need to hit their heads with the color differentiation of their pants.

But here’s what you’re doing, can’t you spend a thousand twenty and buy a decent suit?!", told employees with an average salary per department of 15 thousand rubles, is a symptom.

I work in technical support. In the morning, the chief was caught by a site of an aithishnik healer. % of quote:

I activate the energy channels led by my mandate and the powerful I AM presence.

He said, “No, Noah? Here are the names of the girls – the printer doesn’t print. The printer is sealed. That is what it is!"

In short, I took the phrase on armor. and ;)

In Germany, in the contest for the best idea for environmental protection, the idea of killing all Negroes was once again winning with a big slide!

Sonaris: I’m not a programmer, I don’t know what a joke is, but I know that yawa tea grows twice as long and requires half a cup under a bag.
Programming in Java is the same.

Americano in russian, pizza in slice, teachers in business...and other busy ideas by Dmitry Anatolyevich.

When I was a conductor, we sometimes had concerts on Sundays. Naturally, the orchestra hated such days, as the weekend was covered with a copper basin. And one Saturday evening, the police call me and say, “What about tomorrow’s concert?” “Em, and he didn’t go as planned,” I replied. “I don’t know, tomorrow at 10:00 start!” And all the trouble is that all the events in the army were photographed and sent to the higher command, such as a photo report. I have no program, nothing. and Saturday evening. In short, I called my guys, I say: tomorrow at 9.40 you are dressed, in shape, in the club. The Sunday. A full club of soldiers. The leader goes out and is silent. I photograph him. The leader leaves. Soldiers are confused. A trunk with a tube comes out. He stands in a position and is silent. I am photographing. The soldiers laugh. The trunk is leaving. Further, in different combinations, musicians with instruments come out, everyone is silent, I photograph them. There is wild roast in the room! After all, I say, “Thank you all, the concert is over. Now all get up!” Everyone stands up, the officer still. “Show a stormy applause, I’ll shoot it, and I’ll turn the Terminator on to you!” Applause, I photograph, I release musicians on the weekend, I take pictures. It took 5 minutes and everyone was happy. Especially the deputy was pleased what a good concert came out on the photographs. He never knew the truth.

The neighbor knocks at night.
I ask: “Who?”
He said, “Do you need salt?”

When Fira said, “Itsha, you’re the best,” he realized there was a competition somewhere.

Basically cinematic:
In 2008, a short animated film festival showed a cartoon about a postman who, before spreading the mail, opened letters, and replaced bad news with good. The movie is called The Post. Only with this name to find it on the network proved unrealistic. Suddenly somebody will tell the animation studio or the country of production.

Idiot tasks are discussed in primary school:
We live with a grandmother who can’t tolerate animals, so we didn’t have them. And here is that silly topic with pets. I have a daughter and so-called, and it just got out of itself. I already explained to her in the 108th circle why we don’t have and can’t have animals, which means we won’t write or glue anything in this chapter. And it’s not all behind:"Why is it? Why?" I said:"Because we have a grandmother!!The daughter turned away and I considered the topic closed. But, damn, a few days later, my grandmother caused me a wild scandal. My daughter began to boast of her with this album and showed her the page “My Pets” with a glued grandmother’s photo and a signature of a cowboy “Instead.” My grandmother" On the scream of my grandmother, she said that my mother said so.

In the vast majority of 3D films there is nothing but a beautiful picture. The plot is crushed from the finger, the characters behave like ended idiots, the whole story is either a huge plot hole, or a banal donut. Pepper has a picture.

You’re saying it’s like most 2D movies are something different.

I accidentally sent my photo, where I was naked, to all my acquaintances. Not only was it terribly shameful, so I was almost ruined on labels and envelopes.