bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №121152
 28.11.2015
A dramatic film about DiCaprio.
No matter how hard he tried, he never won an Oscar.
And then to the actor who plays DiCaprio, give an Oscar.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №121151
 28.11.2015
The pressure in the last month has risen suddenly. The doctor speaks from the nerves. What about the nerves? I am completely calm. Sometimes you sit and read. Everything is normal. Suddenly I feel the heartbeat accelerating.
What do you read, news?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №121150
 28.11.2015
What is the minimum distance between photons?
YYY : Nothing. Photons are bosons, they can at least overlap with each other.
zzz: The photons do not have such “hate” for each other — they do not have the principle of Paulie’s prohibition, so there are no limitations in this regard. Well, unless you can pump so many photons into a very small area that a black hole is formed). But this is clearly beyond our capabilities.
XXX: How much do I need to pump?
You promise that you will not.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №121149
 28.11.2015
How, how...

Dontsovs, Marinines, Pelevinas, Aquinas and even with them are actors who play writers. Books for them write diggers for copies (from ten thousand rubles per novel)
How did Pelevin get on that list?

Substances are written for him.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №121148
 28.11.2015
The biggest insult in my life for me was when I was signed up for a toilet covers store on Instagram.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №121147
 28.11.2015
<xxx>Yes, I have something like tetris in the dishwasher in the kitchen...
<xxx> A few seconds before the game.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №121146
 28.11.2015
No money left for vacation?
The Canadian: No! Finally, I will not go on vacation because of poverty, but because of the closure of the airline and terrorist threats!

[ + 37 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121145
 28.11.2015
You are mocking! When should people know about your pregnancy? To get sick from cigarette smoke can be from a hammer. I told you about the manicure. Refusal from alcohol in the company can also be for various reasons. In transportation, your stomach is covered with clothes, it is sealed by other people, only your face is visible. What are the signs to guess??? By the magical glow and mysterious " I cannot"??? You either try to keep a secret, or speak words through your mouth. And do not be angry that you did not say, and they did not guess. Per people think you’re scattered and try not to say anything delicate. In the early stages and this sign will not be, and there will be a frequent rush to the toilet too. Unless there is severe toxicity. Why does anyone have to guess anything at all? People go to work, not to watch for colleagues. Public transport is not used to see other people’s stomachs. Why can’t you guess it? ? to

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121144
 28.11.2015
The apartment was killed by the alchemy, looked around the apartment, immediately realized that a major repair was needed and disinfection was complete. The price is approaching the double. But the price of the two is a great option for a young family. Going into the kitchen...

These blueelves... broke a hole in the concrete floor!! To fuck the fox in the basement!and "

Now it is finally clear that the perforators are constantly producing...

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №121143
 28.11.2015
I have a point: I can’t eat, smoke and kiss until I brush my teeth in the morning. Romance from such hygiene: neither breakfast in bed, neither thankful sex, neither smoking manners after that.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №121142
 28.11.2015
I’m not from the Mamulec coalition (or even rather the Childfrey), but people, what’s wrong with you? Why a woman should explain and justify the request with her not to smoke and not to load her, like a camel. In general, the request not to smoke should be treated more culturally, regardless of whether a young woman expressed it, a middle-aged man or a grandmother in general! You are talking to someone in the spirit of "Hello, and I have an ulcer!"?

And the reluctance to tremble about such personal things in the collective of people with whom the acquaintance is purely business - more than explainable, the people are mostly unstable, and they will immediately start to be harassed with the conversation of the genre "susiki-masusiki" and the invaluable experience of children's senior employees.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №121141
 27.11.2015
Do you know how to swallow yourself?
Tag: on the head
A useful clarification, yes:
Noah, noah, noah is not enough
WOW: Oh, it was like I would start long winter evenings with a collar on my ass - so try to stop me.
My name is Basilica-Hose-Lower Belt.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №121140
 27.11.2015
to this:

Shaman: I am a healer!
Polik_Shaman: I have high blood pressure, as a result - can not drink coffee. But I love...
POLIK_SHAMAN: So I drink a cup of coffee in the morning and then, at night, I pour a cup of green tea into myself.
Polik_Shaman: The antidote is ready!
Chech: Well yes, the pseudonym is justified)))

Usually tea also contains caffeine, and in green it is even more than in coffee.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №121139
 27.11.2015
And why does the folder for 64-bit applications have 32 in the name and 64 for 32-bit? What is > logic?

There is no logic here.
System32 is the classic name of the main Windows system folder from the time of the first 32-bit systems.
The same folder that confused you with the presence of the number "64" in the title - SysWoW64 contains the libraries necessary for reverse compatibility of the 64-bit OS with 32-bit programs. The second part of the name of this folder is deciphered as "Windows on Windows", and the number 64 indicates the current operating system's discharge (for which the compatibility system is intended).

Educational ©

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №121138
 27.11.2015
So that’s why I’m caught all week in the office asking for an ip coffee machine (which she didn’t have when she was born).

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №121137
 27.11.2015
On the third day there is snow. Roads are not cleaned. I write to a friend:
I say hello. How is the mood? The traffic is stable? :)
She is Capec! Not the road, but the laundry board.)
I: not a board, but a vibromassager! and free...
It is free... at the price of the suspension)))

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №121136
 27.11.2015
At work, Max printed a bunch of documents every day.
Today he approaches the printer and issues: “These printers are all the same, they only need paper.”

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №121135
 27.11.2015
She is. Have you purchased the lubricant?
He is. I already have a WD-40, I lubricate her bicycle
She is. Fuck your bicycle!! to

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №121134
 27.11.2015
- And you saw an article on the hub, where the guy complained that he is like a PHP developer, not pleased with the haunting around the language.
“The kind of guy is enough to offend my programming language, I am ashamed to write it because of it. On this I will write an article on the hub, about how bad I live :(
He didn’t even write why he liked this language. Only that he wastes on him, and even no pluses has written, only that he is hated.
- I understand, but fucking, you’re on the hole, that’s for nuts?
- Go mommy probably, shit ppschnik.


[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №121133
 27.11.2015
But in fact, our state kept its promise, and now a liter of gasoline costs less than a dollar.

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