bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №109489
 16.02.2015
Thank you woman for the advice. Now I know how to stick the strawberries.

Marrying and sticking are different things.
I explain this so that it is not painfully painful, or you are all so hard-working and you are rejected.
:D

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №109488
 16.02.2015
This is:
by Hmao. -32. a raspberries, apparently, in memory of a jacket, with mud numbers. The driver’s door window is completely removed. In the door is seen a hand in a nork coat and with a huge ring. So he walked near the traffic jams, not closing the windows.
and blue! We arrived here! On this Japanese paddle in -20 glass lifts climb surprisingly! Mechanically knocked on the drop button, thrown the straw, and back in no one... almost died in the frost.
_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
It’s hard to throw cigarettes out the window. % of

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №109487
 16.02.2015
"completely ignoring the opinion of the husband, the woman gives birth" - sheedever too! and :)
Immaculate conception, not otherwise.
If you don’t want children, don’t end up with your aunt. Without any options.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №109486
 16.02.2015
If the film was directed by Valery Sutkin...

"50 shades of stylish orange tie"

[ + 35 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №109485
 16.02.2015
This creature :
and blue! We arrived here! On this Japanese paddle in -20 glass lifts climb surprisingly! Mechanically knocked on the drop button, thrown the straw, and back in no one... almost died in the frost.

You’d better die. There is a cinderella in the car. Because of people like you, we don’t have roads but garbage.

[ + 29 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №109484
 16.02.2015
Claims to the French of such a plan that Paris was surrendered without a single shot.
— — —
The French will reject your claims with indignation: they prepared well for the war on the Machino line, and in Paris they did not intend to fight at all. But the Germans acted with them "dirty and dishonestly": they did not appear on the "line", they broke immediately to Paris. Not according to the rules of the First World War.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №109483
 16.02.2015
Fuck, I thought it only happens in internet stories!

My husband and I went to the train station for train tickets (you can also buy on the internet, of course, but we went to the train station nearby, decided to walk). Stand in line. Here someone called my husband, he went out to talk, and I stayed in line.

A man of indefinite ages appears, turns the turn of his gaze and decides that I (little, fragile and at the same time significantly younger than most uncles and aunts in turn) - a weak link. He enters the line in front of me, in an attempt to get upset, he begins to bull, that he, say, such as me, for breakfast eats, shakes like a stroke - I will fly away and in general. Everyone is on the line and pretends that nothing is happening. The husband (the big unbarred uncle), hearing that I am offended, comes back and doesn’t even have time to say anything, just looks expressively. Uncle with the words "Oh, sorry!" retires while trying to portray the knicksen. Immediately, as if by the maneuvering of the stick, the row comes to life and begins to condemn the uncle with the choir (which burzhi, you go, to the fragile girl, a fool!) is

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №109482
 16.02.2015
Promise an antique atmosphere.
and?
Sparta is whispering and pinning me out of bed!!!! to

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №109481
 16.02.2015
The practice of biologists could be called "The Mouse Out"

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №109480
 16.02.2015
When you call on people to humanity, you simply invite them to the table.

c) Tuhani

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №109479
 16.02.2015
Spring is near, I tell you.

I go from home to the subway, I do no harm to anyone, suddenly an uncle of the most ordinary kind approaches me (in the sense, neither a drunken nor a drunken is like) and asks:

Are you not a doctor by chance?

A little overwhelmed by such an unexpected question at half eight in the morning (moreover, I am not a doctor by chance, but quite intentionally), I answer:

and no.

The uncle declares: “Well, you would go!” and joyfully departs, leaving us alone with cognitive dissonance...

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №109478
 16.02.2015
Hello, my name is Elena, do you have 2 minutes to answer a few questions?
Let us admit. Ask me.
What is your name?
Abdymelbek Mavdalbeibiebev
- So here is Abnabdablek...shut up until goodbye.

Lena, I hope I didn’t tell you the working day code? With respect, Dmitry

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №109477
 16.02.2015
Zeka-vasch - Three MPs with smoothing boards entered the bus. The rest is boring.
can eugenepiskunov surfers?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №109476
 16.02.2015
Do you carry the armored door or pull it?
==== is
I will get it and write down: wearing or dragging is not my job.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №109475
 16.02.2015
I watched some wonderful Italian movie, where the same situation is shown by the eyes of the wife, and the eyes of the husband.
Two completely different stories.)
— — — —
Name in the studio.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №109474
 16.02.2015
Dear wives, if you are tired of cooking your husband’s borsche, make him a beer or a barbecue. He will like it more.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №109473
 16.02.2015
From the news tape: The deceased pensioner revived from the greed of the funeral agents

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №109472
 16.02.2015
They also lead a vicious way of life.
A vicious way of life? I was very interested. What does it mean?
I do not know exactly. Probably climbing other people’s gardens and drinking beer.

(c) T. Jansson, Memories of the Mummy Troll, 1968

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №109471
 16.02.2015
You know, my dear ones, in the last couple of days I have read a lot of nonsense about the "marry-do not marry", "living together-living alone", and wanted to say... You, fucking, is it serious? Honestly, they broke up a kindergarten. Yes, all people are different, everyone has their own needs, somebody is satisfied with life alone, somebody can't imagine themselves without a "half", and somebody in general is "wrong", I can't understand only one thing, what kind of evil do you rely on trying to impose your point of view? Every man has already chosen his position, do you think his hysterics will turn him into his "faith"?
Reading this is fun, but at least occasionally think before you write another “truth of the century.”
Love, whatever it may be :)

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №109470
 16.02.2015
Machined on
Down button, down button
to throw out, and back into none... almost died on
and frost.
— — —
In the traffic jams to throw out... in the open window of the car... so we live. Sorry for my French.

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