bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №104829
 30.10.2014
News: "Apple CEO Admits He Is Gay"

A news for me too! I knew this right after I installed iOS 8.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №104828
 30.10.2014
Blah blah...

C++ which also writes C#.
– – – –

This is the funny thing of the world.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №104827
 30.10.2014
Once upon a time, in a turbulent and bad youth, she shaved her head. I don’t even remember what I was shooting in the pop at that time. I was very worried about how my husband would react. He, when he saw me with a hairstyle, remained silent for a long time, picking up the words, but eventually shrugged his hand and asked not to do so again. I already thought what happened, but the consequences of that act still affect. Every time we start arguing and my husband ends up arguing, he looks at me with a hypnotic look and repeats:
Go to "Astra" Go to "Astra"!
To argue with him in this situation is useless. and (

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №104826
 30.10.2014
This is your poker faces.
We have an impenetrable expression of the face.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №104825
 30.10.2014
Girls, why is it so difficult for us: long hair to be cut, short to grow, straight to wrap, and curly to straighten?
yy: Racing girls - and why do you have if the figure is normal, then you want to lose weight, and if you are fat, then you do not want to lose weight?))

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №104824
 30.10.2014
The dialogue
Hey to you!
Give us your fuck!

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №104823
 30.10.2014
here here :
— — —
We need to save the country.
Valentine: What one? of Ukraine? % of))
Tagged: Russell
— — —

So show me a finger in the globe at least a country that you don’t need to save from anything?
Take care of yourself, or from such rescuers the USSR died to me.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №104822
 30.10.2014
From a conversation about the upcoming dr from a familiar:
I will not go to him in the afternoon, well, his naffig.
What is it?
- Well, look, on a piece of baton, two circles of half-bottled sausages lie not very smoothly, with a sting. And here, to avoid this, he makes a half-round hole in one circle. I went into the kitchen with him. He was cooking butter. And he made them wreckage. The teeth. Table for 26 people. I’m afraid to guess how he’s mixing cream for cake. I am no longer with his feet on the holidays.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №104821
 30.10.2014
xxx: understood what he reworked when three times in a row, trying to write the word gas pipeline, wrote the pipeline)
yyy: ahah )))
WOW: Is it you?
XHH: This is me
XHH: gas tanks checked for 2 days
Oh yeah fuck
XHH: The Cutters
Tags: gasoline
Ohhhhhhhhhh!!!! to

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №104820
 30.10.2014
Venus is not suitable for life
YYY: There are also cities in Russia that are not suitable for living, but we live.
zzz: yyy, in the Russian Federation there are no cities where the temperature is +460 C
Yyy: And on Venus there are no cities where there are 5000 rubles.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №104819
 30.10.2014
X: Why does the Light remember this? She is not before that! She wakes up at 4 a.m. every day.

He is straight like Hitler. But not though. Hitler attacked at four. So he got up earlier.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №104818
 30.10.2014
A light whale visited me when I saw a book entitled “Stalin’s Steel Balls.” No, the book is not about what everyone thought, but about the Soviet spherical tanks... Interestingly, this is how the publishing house burned, or did the author blow?

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №104817
 30.10.2014
Natalya Y: If you want sex life bright,
Do not get bored in bed
My advice is to marry on dojaras.
They have golden hands!
They have golden breasts!
His hands are too rough.
You are married, guys, on the fleetists
Flute has golden lips.
Nikita Y: It’s all funny, friends, but by.
You would not bother being an adult.
You marry your loved ones.
My favorite gold weddings.
Ivan: Not bad lines, the right word -
Whatever women are, all stars are gold.
In fact, only a couple of divorces...
Buy uplifting clothes.
Roman W: How funny it is. Very much on the subject!
It was not invented long ago.
I will tell you how to solve the problem.
Save money and run yourself!
Andr: Hands, back, golden lips...
This is a big dilemma for me too.
It is better to go to the surgeon.
No eggs – no sex – no problem.
Very radical, without a doubt.
They brought us into the impasse of poetry.
But there is also a solution:
No eggs left, put your ass!
Stas: A collection of talents, the right word!
I see it with my naked eye.
The loss of human dignity.
No reason to be a pedophile!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №104816
 30.10.2014
Strong office wakes

The boss is silent and does not move.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №104815
 30.10.2014
I saw how the children in the courtyard found a drug store, the contents of the foil were poured out, they placed a piece of cat's shit there and put it back.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №104814
 30.10.2014
A quote from Wikipedia about the series "Chernobyl. Area of Exclusion"

Since shooting in the real Zone of Exclusion was dangerous for health, there were very few scenes (these were only short footage, where none of the actors were involved). In the rest, the scenes in Pripyat were filmed in Russia in cities with similar architecture.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №104813
 30.10.2014
by JJ

How to cook fish in the dishwasher
You will need:
1st Philosophy of salmon
2nd Aluminium foil
Three Lemon
4 is the salt
5 is Washing machine
1) Put salmon on the foil, polish, spray with lemon juice. turn to. For fidelity, it can be put in a thermo-resistant package. Put the wrapped salmon in the upper compartment.
Put the dishwasher on a long cycle.
At the end of the cycle, get the fish and clean dishes. Enjoy it!

This is a round cake.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №104812
 30.10.2014
The Soviet rocket engine was designed to fly to America, not from it!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №104811
 30.10.2014
AAA: Leonardo da Vinci slept 15 minutes every 4 hours
He slept an hour and a half a day.

BBB: Do you compare yourself and Da Vinci??? You have ambitions...

AAA: I strive for him
I sleep 4-5 hours.

CCC: and where is Seas?? to
Sleep normally

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №104810
 30.10.2014
The Customer:
"Alexey's round eyes alerted me, but the round gases of the woman were already frightening. We need to quickly gather the specialists and find a solution.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna