bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №79467
 30.03.2013
One of the richest people in Europe of the 18th century, the patron of the arts, the owner of one of the best orchestras (chapelmaster - Joseph Haydn himself (1732-1809)), Prince Nicholas Estergazi "The Great" (1714-1790) considered himself not only an amateur, but also a professional in music. From time to time, he himself stood behind the conductor's control and demonstrated his skill to numerous guests of his luxurious castle - the Hungarian Versailles. One day he came to the rehearsal something annoyed and began to struggle with the musicians. After another comment, the first violin stood up and, politely worshiped, said:
- Your brightness, if you insist, we will play the way you direct.

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №79466
 30.03.2013
Stalevar Kuzyanin did not understand why he was sitting at the fireplace.

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79465
 30.03.2013
Russian Roulette in the office.
1st We find any scattered printer in the local network of the office.
2nd Connect to our computer.
Three We send through it to print a document with the text "You are fat!".
4 is The Profit.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №79464
 30.03.2013
About the blank:
Do you really think that in the field "When Published" I will write "the sixteenth of February of the two thousand and eleventh year", while in the field "When Published" will fit only "UFMS"? The Russian Post.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №79463
 30.03.2013
xxx: I’m doing real estate... So I can say with confidence that the jamsut build exactly the way they’re paid. I gave a tenth, I got a saray, I gave a thousand, I got the Hilton Hotel.
yyy: Judging by my quotation, the developer did not pay them, he still beat them out :(

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79462
 30.03.2013
XXX See also. A centimeter, a millimeter, a nanometer... What other consoles do you know?
Filed to:xbox 360

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79461
 30.03.2013
<chh> playing with our state is dangerous - it has the whole card dropped
< wow> He has no cards at all.
<wow> Just comes a man and announces: "You have lost, bad!".

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №79460
 30.03.2013
The correctness of spelling.
The repair workshop. According to the rules, after repairing the phone, the customer must pick it up within two weeks, otherwise a commission goes.
Dialogue of the girl (brune) with the client: your phone is ready you can pick it up... Yes, you can pick it up later, but keep in mind if you miss the deadlines, etc.
Comments of technicians sitting there: Hello, your phone is ready, but if you do not take it on time, you will waste it. Second comment: your phone has been with us for a year, congratulations to you.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №79459
 30.03.2013
Where to get FineReader with medical emphasis support?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №79458
 30.03.2013
From the news:

In Moscow, near the building of the Hydrometeorological Center on the Great Pretechensky Avenue, a single picket takes place with the demand for the onset of summer. In the action participates a man in swimsuits with a poster #SkoraiByNastartLeto. The hydrometeorologist knows nothing about it.

I did not endure...

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №79457
 30.03.2013
Axe: The Russian Post also has its advantages: on the old Nokia, the battery has become fast. I found a powerful battery under my phone - I ordered it. No one month, no two. I forgot about it and bought a new phone. After six months, the battery came on the old one. I would have come right away, I would have gone like a bad guy with an old nokia :)

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №79456
 30.03.2013
The New Tomb Raider
Aaa: Played with additions, there was another clothes. When it was cold, I dressed Lara in warm clothes. and :)
BBB: I played most of the game in a pilot costume.
XXX: The retro dress of the pilot is the most normal
Why don’t I have a single costume?
BBB: I should have downloaded the DLC
CCC: I have a license
zzz: is it hard probably when the downloaders have more add-ons in the game than the buyers of the game?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №79455
 30.03.2013
xxx (16:54:18 29/03/2013)
at us when drawing up the staff schedule of the sysad called "System administrator" will be theper Sysitem administrator for the underwear)

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №79454
 30.03.2013
My daughter is 2.5 years old.
My dad is a goat!
I: O_o
You are a goat!
I: O_O
She: I am a goat!
I: Aaa, in that sense...

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №79453
 29.03.2013
Conversation in the kitchen:

I am not a pizza.
of MDA. "I don’t think I’m hot"
This is a direct Polish actor. You are not pissing.

[ + 42 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №79452
 29.03.2013
by Pricelist
The film "Mommy for a Mammoth" was recognized as extremist. It promotes the search for parents beyond the ocean.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №79451
 29.03.2013
The meaning of life in schools as a subject?
So I imagine how the children charged with the moral teachings of the pop one day approach the schedule, see the replacement and begin to pass from mouth to mouth joyful "There is no meaning to life, there is no meaning to life!"

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №79450
 29.03.2013
I live in the same apartment with my sister. A guy periodically goes to her, let’s call him Dima, who has one feature: he doesn’t enter the apartment, but runs extremely unnoticed.

I: I never know if we have it or not. There is no way to get to the toilet in a single shirt!
Sister: Don’t worry like that! Smoke like a cockroach, he fears you more than you fear him.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №79449
 29.03.2013
Mom and brother drink tea in the kitchen, I go to the universe. I put on a sweater on the dress, rolling in front of the mirror.
Mommy, wondering: why are you like a French clown?
Brother, Hichika: and that’s Mom, now it’s called Hipsters!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №79448
 29.03.2013
This is a repellent!! You cannot eat it! Smell and smoke too.
Q: Are you still there?! to
Can violet dehydrate dogs be prohibited from sucking?
Zzz: A good, apparently a repellent...

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna