bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №78687
 14.03.2013
Class of 6th class:
- Bull, well you turned your face to me, or I've been watching your neck for 15 minutes! Remove your legs from the passage, or I will sit on the floor!
The bulls, turning around, with horror:
In the col?! to

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №78686
 14.03.2013
What can I give to my dad on the day?
ear: give him something that begins with the letter o and ends with a decolon

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №78685
 14.03.2013
About the women:
The employee issued: "Better go faster! I’m hot, I’m going to freeze!"
...!
I thought long. It turned out that she was just in her coat, spotting, going out and freezing!
How reduced it!

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №78684
 14.03.2013
"To elect a Roman Pope for the first time failed..." (RBC)
I went there yesterday and watched the Champions League.)

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №78683
 14.03.2013
When she explained to me for half an hour what effect when changing slides in Powepoint'e should be set on each slide. At the same time, the description was accompanied by a handshake, artistic acoustic and expressive echoing of the eyes, and suddenly my predecessor came to me before leaving: "You are more careful with her, she is already old and fucking."


[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78682
 13.03.2013
I am surprised by the Slow-Mail of Russia, and the story is this:
I myself live in Novosibirsk and I ordered a bank card from Moscow, I was given a number for its tracking and I went off.

November 13, 2012 The package departed from Moscow
November 8, 2012 in Novosibirsk
and then disappeared, no notices, no signs in the tracking, but this is a miracle

07.03.2013 at 00:00 am the storage period has expired
07.03.2013 at 14:10 she arrived at the place of delivery, 14 hours after the storage period expired.

and Final
10.03.2013 at 00:00 she was sent back

As a result, I only learned about this 12.10.13 and in the end I never received the card, and the deeply respected TP of this equally respected organization said that I will not receive the package now.
A huge thank you to Slow-Mail of Russia for the excellent service, so that they are not sweet there.

@Great_ink

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78681
 13.03.2013
I write to a friend from work.

I want sex.
She: Is this a general message?)))

[ + 26 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78680
 13.03.2013
XXX is
It is more profitable to open a church than to sell heroin.
YYY
Selling heroin in church.
YYY
The Profit!!! to
XXX is
There is no need to sell heroin. Reduced 90%

[ + 28 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78679
 13.03.2013
Drinking a champagne.

You’d better read the dictionary before your husband is gone. Blend the champagne! It’s even on a bottle!

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №78678
 13.03.2013
It was only in 1806 that Ph.Bozzini, now considered the inventor of the endoscope, designed an apparatus for examining the rectum and uterine cavity. The device was a hard tube with a system of lenses and mirrors, and the source of light was a candle. This device, unfortunately, has never been used for human research, since the author was punished by the Vienna Medical Faculty "for curiosity".

The Doctor? Because of curiosity??? >_<

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №78677
 13.03.2013
From the Dating Site:

Dmitry today 1:19
Greetings =
Marina today at 1:21
I’m looking for someone who can help both of you cloth and place the tiles in the bathroom.
Dmitry today 1:22
and Ogo. What about Tajikistan?

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №78676
 13.03.2013
Lord of the RIG: Petya you are an aitišnik, which yandex you are?

[ + 46 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78675
 13.03.2013
I realized my long-time dream :)
The BBB?
Aaa: The light was cut off all over the house.
Did you have UPS?
A: It will happen to a neighbor - to find out if there is light or not.
I open... in one room music is played (on the notepad) from another room - light (the child's lamp is connected to the UPS) from the kitchen clearly heard TV - news is broadcast (from the iPad to 3G). The question is, do you have the light? The answer is NO! I close the door... I look in the eye – standing in the shower – trying to understand what it was...))))))
BBB :))

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №78674
 13.03.2013
Why does dark matter not manifest itself?
YYY: It is so dark, you can’t see it. It should have been called light matter. What a ship is called...
YYY: And the dark energy is the same. Even worse, the energy in general is not very comfortable to see. I would call it the red carpet. Searching is easier.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №78673
 13.03.2013
xxx:...Well, judging by the fact that the conversation turned to the size of the members, you went to the amendment.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №78672
 13.03.2013
DASH, MASH, SASH, I did not gloss at the end.
Natasha: You put me completely.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №78671
 13.03.2013
ZZZ
Anna is good.

XXX is
But does not report

YYYY
Anushka did not bring oil either.

XXX is
The Poor Berlioz

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №78670
 13.03.2013
Google is developing a RING for storing passwords and authentication wherever you can save a password.

Alexis: and how many new colors will appear in the beat phrase: "And now exchange rings in sign of love and loyalty to each other..." ;)

Shpankov
Per one of the few latest Google ideas that delight. The main thing is that by giving everyone the rings, Google did not do one major, all-powerful, controlling the rest...

Barster
"My ppsprrelease!"

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №78669
 13.03.2013
xxx: "It has long been known that in African savanas and jungles do not find bivalves
The dead elephants. There is even a legend that elephants go to die.
A mysterious and untouchable elephant cemetery. andquot;
xxx: It seems to me alone that, given the market value of ivory, this is the fault of the overly entrepreneurial and intrusive Bushmen?

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №78668
 13.03.2013
XXX I am a doctor. I don’t want to take the license exam. I want Robert Downey Jr.
Madam a narcissist?

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