bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №78407
 07.03.2013
News: Topol" Monet sold at auction for $ 22.5 million
For a long time I wondered who Monja was and why he was sold our rockets.

[ + 26 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78406
 07.03.2013
xxx: Andrei here recently demonstrated to the girls how the multimeter works.
xxx: That is, if I were asked what he is doing, I would answer: "He is showing girls his device".

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №78405
 07.03.2013
We sit at work by a friendly company of two programmers and a mathematician, we verify two versions of the algorithm, which in theory should work the same way. Everything seems to be the same from the first to the last line, but it works differently. The second defeated mathematics in despair: "And show me your Pi". I looked, turned to me and complained, “Max, he has a longer Pi!” In fact, it was the exact number Pi.

[ + 59 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78404
 07.03.2013
Usually Varlak, aka Shadow of Risi disappeared in the evening and appeared in the morning.
Eat and sleep.

So far everything was normal with food, but suddenly and unfortunately there was hunger.
At first, a second delivery was chewed, the next one turned out to be rejected.

And then came “White Silence,” practically based on Jack London.
One morning, Varlak looked at all his grandmothers, all his children, and left at night.
The night was about -30. Warlock left and did not come back in the morning.

Meanwhile, the day with great difficulty came gazelle and loaded half a ton of fresh (by the way, the breeder in his combat consume from 200 to 400 kg of fresh meat per month, depending on the number of kittens).

And closer to the night, Varlak declared with fed protein in his teeth and suddenly saw the folded stakes of food, in the form of chicken-indushearted hearts, stomachs, neck and other proper nutrition.

According to witnesses, the scene was worth watching.
The whole Varlak said, “Well, how long did I spend this time at home?and "
Then he turned and carried the body in the direction of the snowy corn field.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №78403
 07.03.2013
Olegino It is necessary to add a survey whether anyone will cry if the head of our country dies
252 question is not correct... tears come from joy...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №78402
 07.03.2013
xxxxxxxxxxx:
No, the beer is not enough, the stitch in the subway gave the man a little bit - he played on the harmoshka. Fuck, the song is stuck.
WOW :
He jumped rington, hole...

[ + 20 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78401
 07.03.2013
[23:19:53] udaff: I had a quarrel here with my neighbor — well, I can’t fuck her if she doesn’t know about the gravix, the ash and the red pants.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №78400
 07.03.2013
@ilyabirman: It would be funny, of course, if I was taught to wear an Apple watch. Let’s imagine what they will be able to do other than show time?
@bolknote: in the first version the time they will not show, this will be added in the third update.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №78399
 07.03.2013
Sorry for Chavez. A soulful man, he kissed the hands of the girls-collectors at our factory, where calashes are produced. The shortcomings, they all have.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №78398
 07.03.2013
What kind of shit do you agree with me???? to

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №78397
 07.03.2013
Conversation with my mother:
Mother: Get a piece of meat in the top shelf. The bone must be there.
Mother : well?
I: I got it, did I answer you by phone, what?
Mother: I got it! Talk to your friends like this.
I am the meat. I got the meat out of the refrigerator, woman!
Mother :...

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №78396
 07.03.2013
s1106: Chelsea captain John Terry was removed in the 37th minute of the Champions League final between Barcelona and Real Madrid.
Judge Junight Chakyr removed Terry for a rough reception against Alessis Sanchez. It is worth noting that at the time, Sanchez did not possess the ball.
I don’t know how to remove Terry in the match between Barcelona and Real Madrid.

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78395
 07.03.2013
XXX: She said she doesn’t know what a discette is! How can you communicate with a person who doesn’t know what a discette is!!! to
YYY: M... Do you often talk to girls about discs?

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78394
 07.03.2013
Here in Venezuela Chavez died - the inhabitants are mourning a week, no one works. Who is interested in dying?
by Stalin!

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №78393
 07.03.2013
Yes, my lord, we won this battle, but we lost the night.
All night, shit, we’ve lost! Before the working Friday!! to
I hate you!!! to

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №78392
 07.03.2013
One day, some of the dumbest monkeys never learned to climb trees. Thus began the history of humanity.

[ + 29 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78391
 07.03.2013
News about threats to smartphones
xxx: I have a phone for 600 rubles and I don’t worry about mobile security.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №78390
 07.03.2013
by Alexander:
Mosaic
and Xander:
M is?
by Alexander:
I think it’s time to get married.
and Xander:
to you?
and Xander:
And the meaning?
by Alexander:
I wanted to cook myself.
Xander
You will have to cook for two.
With your luck.
by Alexander:
I have comforted

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №78389
 07.03.2013
The most difficult thing is for gourmets: they drop their dreams into the toilet every day.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №78388
 07.03.2013
I live in Hamburg. There is such a town in the Bundestag. There is a place called Chance. One of the features of the area is that 3-4 times a year local radical leftists and anarchists organize a small local revolution there. They burn barricades from garbage stores, rockets fly to the police, glasses are beaten in a pair of stores. Several cars are being set on fire for the company, negligently left by disorderly owners in the area of riots. What is characteristic, the excitement does not arise suddenly. The days when events will happen, everyone knows and is preparing accordingly. Police and revolutionaries. One of my acquaintances also prepared. He had an old murdered Opel, the price of which was from the force of 200 euros. In the evening, a few hours before the beginning of the events, the car was successfully parked near the epicenter. It should be noted that such poor cars do not touch the revolutionaries. Cars are burning. But our fire that night burned the first. And why? An entrepreneurial acquaintance placed stickers on the car in several places. “Germany above all,” the Nazi party, “foreigners out of Germany!” and etc. As you know, the left radicals, apart from the state, the police and the bourgeoisie, do not like any fascists. The insurance paid for a piece of iron.... 3000 Euros.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna