The case was about 8 years ago.

I go to the dispatcher’s office, there is an expeditor from another brigade. Didn’t the brigade come?

I say I need money, taking for any work.

Word for word and she told me her sad story.

Her husband died suddenly last year. As it all happened, there was no money for the funeral. I took a loan. I asked my neighbor to go as a guardian. They were family friends and knew each other well. The neighbor agreed. He paid the loan correctly. After a while, a neighbor came to her with the same request. I helped you, now you help me. She agreed. Then the neighbor quarrels with his wife and disappears in an unknown direction. Stop paying the loan. She is to the neighbor. I said I didn’t take that loan. I will not pay. I am now paying out someone else’s loan. Almost all the salary goes for it.

You cut off your finger.

Googling is what you do.

and a fox. In the search engine "cut off the finger - we will tell you what to do"

Open the link:

1st The history of finger cutting from ancient times

2nd What the Finger is made of

Three How to cut a finger

4 is Why not cut your finger, but your hand?

More than 100,500 points.

And you scatter all this shit to find out what to do, and there:

Cut your finger and go to the doctor.

And so everywhere. is angry.

Equality is only half possible: everyone can live equally badly, and equally well-not.

Russian army in the late 1990s. In the middle of the steppe in the Jewish Autonomous Region. Combat brings information on the morning divorce:
Comrades officers and officers! A soldier fled from us. He left two days ago, so he’s already far away. But since there is no fuel in the part, we are looking for the escaped here!

You live a full and full life with a lot of adventures, and then it turns out that it is alcoholism.

The star of captivating happiness is polar.

Yesterday’s story of the villages reminded me.
My grandmother, who had long gone to the better world, lived in the village. In the village without livestock it is impossible: she had ducks, chickens, pigs, three cows, goats and rabbits. A dog to guard the whole farm. and a cat. What about a cat when mice and rats live next door? The cat was big and heard a great rat.
Then someone came to the village to carry chickens. Every morning someone lacked one or two insects. People began to think of the cat. A delegation came to my grandmother.
“Maria, your cat is stealing chickens. This is not the case, the walkers said.
All the arguments that it was not a cat came across a deaf wall of misunderstanding.
Shaking heart, the grandmother asked the grandfather to take the cat to relatives to the district center. Or somebody from the village could be quick on hand and learn to kill a cat.
The cat was taken away, and the chickens continued to disappear. The first walk of my grandmother:
“Because of you, Herod, I have taken sin on my soul.
The rumor that the cat was not spread throughout the village and stopped walking with complaints. The insects continued to disappear. A few days later there was a rumor in the village that it was a chicken bite and it was seen in several places.
And a few days later, a cat entered the cage... The pillows on his legs were scratched, the legs in blood, dirty, scratched... The cat approached the grandmother, looked at her and complained, as if asking to be left. Maybe I thought, but I saw tears in his cheeks and eyes.
Grandma carefully took the cat on her arms and large tears flowed on her cheeks. This is
It was the only time I saw my grandmother, a nurse who had gone through the whole of the Second World War, with tears in her eyes.
The cat was cured, and the neighbors no longer cried about the chickens. After some time, the cat, all in wounds, brought in the teeth of a dead hornet.

I’m so old that I remember the police chiefs being honest people in the movies.

A colleague yesterday, during the interruption, issued:

“I don’t consider myself a sexist. I would be a sexist if I thought that the place of a woman is in the kitchen. But I don’t think so, because men objectively prepare better than women.”

One day in a sample store where I work, a woman long persuaded her husband to sample another jeans. On the offer also something to look after, she replied, "I have everything, I don't have time to wear! “”

Here is the dialogue between the cabins:

Someone: Man, and where did you find such a woman? There is more there?

Our man from the cabin: no more, I will not give.)

Women: I have a lot of disadvantages, I drink and smoke))

Somebody (admired): So you can even bump! ? )

At school, a math teacher replaced a geographer and asked about the highest mountain on the planet. Everyone is screaming about Everest and it’s with them, and I’m picking up the Olympic peak on Mars. The teacher wanted me to get a pair, but I said I was right, because it was necessary to clarify on which planet! 10 for cleverness and cleverness.

Lunch at work. I ask the new one:

What year will you be born?

by 1997.

I went to school this year!

A man from the neighboring department:

In 1997? I finished school that year and went a long walk.

This was how I first felt old, and immediately realized that it was not quite yet.

Once at a literary lesson, the teacher asked what was the essence of the silent scene at the end of Gogol's play "Revizor". I had a book with excerpts from Gogol's letters to friends, I quickly reviewed them and found one where he wrote about this scene, said, will best show the shock of the heroes, a spectacular ending. And I sounded. The teacher said that this thought only pulls the four. I told my mother at home, they burned. The fourth is the thought of Gogol. On the four...

If the lady opens her mouth, and the man does not get any pleasure from it, then you have to change the entire lady.

sadly
I will be 53 years old in December. Pension under the new law. Since January I fall under the law that those who are 5 years before retirement, those not to be fired.
I was very happy to be able to work for 5 years and pay my bills. Salary is good, conditions are good, a dream, not a job.
Last week my boss called me and announced a reduction.

This is so. And with this new law I may not be able to work now.
I worry.

Soon we will see the first case in history where a prosecutor, a defender, a midfielder and an attacker will appear in court.

A couple of weeks ago I went to the cinema with my kids. We bought tickets 5 minutes before the start, and then they remembered that they hadn't taken anything from food with them, so it turned out that they hadn't eaten since morning. I say to my wife - go to the hall, I'll run to the KFC, I'll buy the little things and coke, I'll come back in a few minutes. I go back with a bag in which there are whistles, in the hands of a couple of large glasses with a collar, and here my way is blocked by a guard. Sorry, but not with your food and drinks. How I begin to get angry. - These are the rules, read here, and point to the tablet on which it is written - you can not bring food and drinks purchased outside the cinema area into the hall. Everything needs to be purchased in a local cafe, where it costs times more expensive.



The security guard explains that there are cameras everywhere and the management monitors this. Hm, and what should I do now? I ask him a question.



“You can put it on this table and take it after the session,” he said. How is it? They will disappear! I’m already preparing to leave them there because the session has begun. And then the guard approaches me and quietly says: you can buy in the neighboring "children's world" package, put your food there and pass, it's not forbidden, nobody sees what's there. I thank him, I go to the “children’s world”, I buy a package, I put my purchases there and I quietly pass by the guard who pretended not to see me. We were the only ones in the room.



Thank you guard!

Religious views: an atheist

One day my best friend decided to go on a diet. Well, you know this classic diet: in the morning black coffee and toast, for lunch chicken breasts without salt and salad leaves. And since we rented the apartment together, I was forced to sit on that diet. for the support. For the third day, I lie without strength on the couch and say:
I feel like I have super abilities. Especially the super smell. Here I hear on the 2nd floor in the apartment number 40 cooking soup. of beef. Probably with a housekeeper. What a delicious.
In fact, I just opened the cat’s canned food. I feel like they have to be hidden from you.

Ramzan threatened all Chechens who behave unworthy in Moscow with a terrible punishment - to return to Chechnya!