bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №78007
 27.02.2013
12:35:43 xxx for [yyy]: I was driving in a coupe with two aunts over 50.. I learned all about them. Why I listened to it.

[ + 47 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78006
 27.02.2013
I go out on the street and meet a blonde. All as appropriate: long legs, a fashionable shirt, a short shirt, looking like 25+. Next from her question:
Can you tell me where the house number 88 is? First I go 87, then I go 89. I do not understand anything!
I first thought she was joking.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №78005
 27.02.2013
Hi, restaurant N
Good morning, please tell me, do you have a calcium?
Yes, but he is busy.
WOW: How much is it worth?
Q: How much does the calcium cost?
The sound of a falling object. The man’s voice, dark: We don’t have any more caly...
HHH: Come with yours!

[ + 11 - ] Comment quote №78004
 27.02.2013
How often do men have to say for sex "I’m you too."

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №78003
 27.02.2013
aaa> came spam with topic
aaa> Company to buy shuka caviar frozen for import to Romania
bbb> sounds like encryption

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №78002
 27.02.2013
In a sign of gratitude, he blinked with stop signals.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №78001
 26.02.2013
Today saw the apogee of the grotesque - went to a florist, and there is a goop in a fork, in an adidas and a paddock, and with the face of a non-professional makes a bouquet.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №78000
 26.02.2013
by Theme

A friend bought an AMG merine, and for six months he found all sorts of pieces in it.
Yyy: first found in the suitcase of its previous owner.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №77999
 26.02.2013
My wife and I were crying from laughter yesterday. She picked up the suitcase (with which she came from Milan). In a bag of gifts, things and she gets a package. A shirt in the package. T-shirt from the company where she works. On the Men’s T-shirt is written in Russian: I HOLP the turtles are drawn and at the bottom of the typical attribute forward to the target. These T-shirts are hanged as a basic collection in EUROPE (i.e. everywhere) A short girlfriend took her to the office today, will cry all the office

[ + 38 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №77998
 26.02.2013
I work in a music store. On an ordinary day, a girl approaches and asks:
What is the price of mediators?
1 of 5 hryvnia. Does the partner respond?
D and two?
N is 10 hryvnia. He looks at her closely.
D is one?
N is mm. and 5 hryvnia.
Then I’ll buy one, so it’s cheaper.

We depend...

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №77997
 26.02.2013
We discuss someone’s code at work:
xxx: So you can imagine that there is a fragment of 15 lines of code repeated 37 times. If you put it in the function, you can save half a thousand lines!
YYY: It is singing.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №77996
 26.02.2013
Everyone is talking about breaking patterns. I really encountered it. and literally. Two Roma women came to me and presented themselves as Jehovah’s Witnesses. They talked about heaven on earth. But the most epic was when they said there would be no more guesses!!! O_O

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №77995
 26.02.2013
Kas_alex: inheritance or recursion?
Twenty years ago, my father was sitting in the shelter, listening to the group Aquarium and drinking the beer Jigulevo. Twenty years later, I sit in the shelter, listen to the group “Aquarium” and drink the beer “Zhygulevskoye”.
pftw: Not inheritance or recursion. of Russia.

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №77994
 26.02.2013
Wake up support:

Engineer: Have you come? Enter the password 56845.

Is it Russian or English?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №77993
 26.02.2013
The 5-liter engine, like a 5-size chest - will not leave anyone indifferent

I like small breasts and a 1.5 litre engine is quite suitable.
I seem to have found a rule.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №77992
 26.02.2013
When I was a kid, my mom told me that a person’s teeth change twice in life: at 10 and 45 years old, having in mind that inserts appear. I believed in this shit until I was 25 years old and bite it all the time. This is the most cruel naeb in life.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №77991
 26.02.2013
Thanks to the TNT channel, for sunsets on Saturday and Sunday evening - I was able to play tanks in peace.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №77990
 26.02.2013
...
- In principle, hell with it, with the site, but it would be better for children to disconnect from the Internet - the Internet from children is dull.
Ideally, officials should be disconnected from the Internet, even children are fooled by them.
...

[ + 20 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №77989
 26.02.2013
On the websites of real estate agencies recently appeared online consultations
Well, here is the website of the real estate agency manager-consultant (MK) years so forty and the user is a foreigner (P).
You can ask your question to an online consultant
P – Hello I would like to buy a house in the countryside
Hi, sorry, I don’t speak English.
Q: Do you not speak in English?
MC: I repeat again I don’t speak English!
If you do not understand me, use Google translator please.
I’m not telling you again, I’m not talking about yours!
use google translator please
use google translator please
use google translator please
I learned German, I don’t know what you are writing.
Tagged: pizda ebanaya
Service message: User has left the site.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №77988
 26.02.2013
yyy: Shark, throw, I crunch yesterday night dreamed of this girl Exlorerovskaya c pictures about browsers.
xxx Erotic podium, you so take off her mommy, and there... the nipples square.
YYY : Why?
xxx: Because border-radius does not support

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna