bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №76007
 17.01.2013
Yesterday until late, the upper neighbors were having fun with very loud music.She didn't sleep and brutally avenged at 6 in the morning, rolling the columns full with the words: "You can't fall asleep without music, and I can't wake up."

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №76006
 17.01.2013
XXX: Feeling like a wicked man. I remove the game from the client's comp "Mixers go on campaign", saying: "Mixers don't go on campaign".

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №76005
 17.01.2013
Anna, 4 years old: I will soon get married
Will you invite me and my dad to the wedding?
– No
and?
You did not invite me to yours.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №76004
 17.01.2013
We go with a friend, we pass by the pharmacy:
I: Wait, I have to go and buy condoms.
He: Oh, have you met someone?
I: No, at work with the guy I bet he won’t be able to invite a new one to a date.
He is a young man, and the devachu has caught, and the gondons have stumbled.)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №76003
 17.01.2013
Victoria Beckham compares her husband’s member, David Beckham, to an o_O tractor’s exhaust pipe
YYY: Well, what do you say here... exalted poetic relationships in people.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №76002
 17.01.2013
Daviece looked at the demotivator, which depicts children, with horror in their eyes, scattering "A collection of tasks for entering the VTUZY under the edition of M.I. Scan" and signature – childhood is over. I am still scared when I see this book. How much grey she has plunged into us, especially the tasks of Group C.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №76001
 17.01.2013
When I was in school, and I was studying well, I laughed at stories about sleepless nights during a session at the universities. After all, like this, you can prepare, calmly learn everything. Now they laugh at me...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №76000
 17.01.2013
Handur
Is it not Leonardo DiCaprio lying on the floor?
and
Drblack
I do not understand in lying dicapries.
and
Handur
In the Titanic he sank, in the beginning he slept.
Here he lies.
and
Drblack
Interesting work

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №75999
 17.01.2013
Comments on Smart Refrigerator:

Exhibition CES2023 presents to your attention the toilet, which:

a) analyzes feces, making a conclusion about human health

b) the sound of the curtain

c) is subordinated to your fifth point

d) washes, wipes, and sends data to the social network, where your friends can estimate how much your toilet has done the job perfectly.

e) if friends did not like the work of the toilet, they can send the data to the server and the developers will be able to correct the errors

Samsung Galaxy Sral: reliability, environmental protection and hygiene.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №75998
 17.01.2013
I talk to a girl, she is a big lover of horror films and all kinds of horror films.
Tell me something terrible.
I: for example?
It is: Think of it.
I: well
I: Iran has nuclear weapons.
She says, “It’s not scary.
I: You’re not scared, and the Americans are just fucking fucking ?

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №75997
 17.01.2013
And I was also sitting in a known place, studying the instructions for the air refresher. The phrase "Use only in a well-ventilated room" was pleased.
For a long time, I wondered why I needed an air refresher in a well-ventilated room.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №75996
 17.01.2013
XXX: How is it? That you read it

Yyy: Crime and Punishment

XXX: The Scatter Killer

[ + 29 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75995
 17.01.2013
Andrei (18:21:55)
How to cook compot in the microwave?

Andrei (18:33:26)
I broke a banana, an apple and an apple.

by Andrew (19:16:10)
Never cook bananas!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №75994
 17.01.2013
Talking to his brother about his cat barely eating meat.

You know, everyone’s tastes are different.
He has you what? A vegetarian?
(B) looking at his cat – no, he’s dumb.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №75993
 17.01.2013
YYY: I am curious... does the car car in Vladivostok have dealers?
XXX: Yes
YYY: Courageous though

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №75992
 17.01.2013
Lex-z: My main achievement is that in the past work, the cactus was called by my name)))

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №75991
 17.01.2013
I asked the girl if the color of orange was such a iron.
I was given the answer: this iron is yellow-red.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75990
 17.01.2013
To news on one website about the Olympic torch 2014
In the contours of the torch the silhouette of the pen of a magical bird that brings luck and happiness is guessed. This pattern is familiar to the inhabitant of Russia by fairy tales and legends about the Jhar-Bird.
In the contour of the torches is guessed the label "Russian vodka". The designers are back again!!! to

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75989
 17.01.2013
It is on the verge of disappearance, reports Bloomberg. At the same time, scientists are seriously concerned about the problem of the possible disappearance of this species of insects. “Care for pubic hair has led to a serious depletion of pubic lice populations,” says Ian Bergess, a medical entomologist at the insect research company in Cambridge, England. Because of the depilation of the squares threatens an environmental catastrophe.” Janet Wilson, a consultant on sexual health and HIV prevention, said: “The destruction of the habitat of lobster lice is gaining momentum, this species is under threat.”
Oh those British scientists :-)

[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75988
 17.01.2013
I will never give you to anyone.
Even for a hundred thousand dollars???? to
Oh yeah, of course!! to
WOW : :-)
No one will give so much for you ?

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