bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №68086
 07.08.2012
It is not difficult to legalize it in Russia. Who will work after lunch?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №68085
 07.08.2012
Conversation with Mom:
M: And what are you taught only in the institute?
I: We are not taught, we are given food for reflection.
M: Ah, and you, I’ll see, you’re sitting on a diet.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №68084
 07.08.2012
In fact, men recognize the presence of female intuition, but call it in their own way: "Nakarkala!"

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №68083
 07.08.2012
I call my wife:
Lunch with Pellegrini?
She: Yes, I already put it, and what?
I: I think it’s white or red (a kind of joke about wine)
She: ketchup is, buy cream

[ + 33 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68082
 07.08.2012
In the courtyard opened a barbecue salon for Yorkshire terriers. On the sign were attached red letters "In honor of opening the first customers a discount of 50%". My father, a man of old hardness, when Champaiah drowns until now, is a steal, and he doesn’t know that we have Yorkshire terriers that live so badly, I suspect that he doesn’t even know what kind of beast it is. In short, I didn’t even doubt that Dad would be the first customer, even with such a discount. Imagine, he tells me, came beautiful like a ice cream, sat in a chair, I sit, the barber is also sitting, silent. I cried, she was silent, I greeted – she was silent, and only when she said, “Where is your cuddly baby?” I went to read the sign again.

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68081
 07.08.2012
I walk down the street, walking out my Yorkshire terrier. Meeting a couple (wife, husband) jealous of my "volkodav"
J: Oh, what a slump, what a kind of "Fuck" it looks like!
M is breed!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №68080
 07.08.2012
Discussions about the car accident:
Horse: If you, fool, intend to kill yourself, then land the passengers. Or at least ask for their consent. Don’t build yourself out of Gasteel, don’t decide for others.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №68079
 07.08.2012
C Dirty
Gosdep, 05.08.2012 at 19.59 We need to send two Jedi to Syria for negotiations.
Alexandras, 05.08.2012 at 20.02 gosdep, In Syria Jews are not liked.

[ + 31 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68078
 07.08.2012
Yesterday we went with friends, drank beer, talked. A young couple arrives. The girl, pointing at us: "Well, you see, all beer is drinking". Guy: "And you will get the p**s!"
That is the motivation.)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №68077
 07.08.2012
Well, what are we crossing today?
and no.
Why not?! to
The parallel lines do not cross - we will roll together

[ + 15 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68076
 07.08.2012
Breakfast at Tiffany is the perfect movie, now they don’t do it anymore. Audrey Hepburn is the perfect girl.
Now they don’t do that anymore.)

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №68075
 07.08.2012
with VIO

What to do if the guy is cold?
A to buried.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №68074
 07.08.2012
With Google WiO:

Q: I have not had sex for 2 weeks, what should I do?? to
A broken hand? xd

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №68073
 07.08.2012
Conversation in the ash with a chlamydia.
Roosevelt: You don’t get anything! I am in trend!
CHESHIRR : Yes? Does this disappear?

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №68072
 07.08.2012
Katya, you are the TP
Catherine: What does that mean?
sector: so beautiful
Catherine: Oh, pashibits, the sun :-*

*Catherine changed status to "I TP!!and "

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №68071
 07.08.2012
The xxx:
It is bad to clean the berries with a sick imagination.
Cleaning the cherry with a spike is a shaped factory of underground abortions, and not always successful.
Pressing the juice of red rice through the gasoline seems to compress someone’s heart, big and pink. A heart attack, whitened bleeding tissue that blooms again and again only then to make everything happen again and again. And with each cycle it dries and dries, leaving the most valuable thing in the pot.
And you will unfold the gasoline to pull out the sting and the sting: a clear example of the work of the intestines, food, as it is there...

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №68070
 07.08.2012
111: This is something else. I administered somewhat a small office with a small cohesive team, so their bugs had the habit after any action on my part to say "thank you, Vadik, you are a real friend", to which I always answered "nothing, the job is like this". Next is just a song. calls a gender and wraps orders in my face. I literally no longer remember, but I was forbidden to respond in this way, and I should have responded in a kind and friendly way, because the girls refused to address the senseless scourge to me, even if the system driver was dying, scattering sparks on the curtains, or somewhere the quarterly report disappeared.
Is the gender also female?
111, and then

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №68069
 07.08.2012
The customer came to repair the cartridge. Inside the cartridge, one hair is not visible. We ask:
Do you have a cat there?
He is so sad:
We had a dog... we had a dog.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №68068
 06.08.2012
xxx: Shash here thought... throw, as the Japanese are offended - not much that the Russian Kurils do not give, so also the gold for judo is pressed!

[ + 30 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68067
 06.08.2012
The Law on Pedophilia

According to the law, a person over the age of 18 cannot fuck a person under the age of 16.
Let’s look at a couple.
He is 17 and is 14 - well, it's not that - they fuck and fuck.
I am 18 and I am 15. by law low
19 and 16 again.

How can they be under the law?

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