D: Well punish me ?
M: Hook to the right
D: You can’t do it.) Not because, but because you can’t beat girls.
M: Okay, I am a mess. ))
D: OOOOO, but this is not a penalty.
M: What does it smell?
D: for encouragement

If a husband dreams of one thing and a wife dreams of another, then a husband dreams all his life.

The story is not funny, but I think it is quite interesting. It happened with a friend of my grandfather (the kingdom of both is heavenly).
As 19-year-old boys, they were called into the ranks of the Red Army in that distant and terrible 1941 and went to defend the Motherland. Grandfather fought in the parachute regiment, was seriously wounded and in 1943 demobilized from the active army.
From his friend - a joke, a ballagour and a lucky man, there were no news. In other words, he was “disappeared.” My grandfather comforted my friend’s parents.
He assured me that everything would be okay with him, that he wasn’t such a character to take and the abyss. “He will come back after the war, he may be in captivity, but he will survive, he is alive.”
Then it turned out he was looking into the water. In 1946, his mother received the first letter from his son. He wrote that everything was okay, he was in his homeland, in the USSR and soon will return. He returned a year later, thin, exhausted, serious, but not broken. And told the amazing story of his life, which I will try to bring here: Almost as soon as he got on the front, his unit was thrown to breakthrough. The breakthrough ended in a failure, and he received three gunshot wounds and was captured unconsciously. How he survived in captivity is a separate story. But he did not defile his soldier's honor by joining the Turkestan Legion.
(analogue of the Vlasov ROA, recruited from soldiers from the Central Asian republics of the USSR), did not cooperate with the Germans. by V
In 1944, they were sent to dig rocks in France, where the landing of the Allied troops was to take place. After the landing of the landing, he and several comrades unfortunately, having broken a small number of guards with shells and blades, fled to the Americans. The Americans sent him to their camp for former Red Army prisoners. According to him, he was in the United States. As he later told, he there first learned what the 8-hour working day is, healed and strengthened, they worked on the farms of Americans. For the first time in my life, I saw private cars and gasoline. For the guy from the Aula, it was a shock! My grandfather told me that they laughed at him in the hall and did not believe that there were gas stations where you could easily come and buy gasoline.
After the end of the war, a Soviet officer came to them in the camp, I think that a military attaché at the embassy or something like that, and began to agitate to return to the Motherland, to say that the war was over and all who were captured but did not bother themselves with cooperation with the Nazis may not be afraid of anything, etc. etc. Some did not believe it and remained in the United States, and most decided to return. They were brought to some paradise island, where there was warmth, the sea, fed until the fall and no work. They waited for the Soviet transportation for about a month. As a result, some tanker arrived, everyone was loaded into a trunk and the difficult road home began. As a result, they were brought to Sakhalin, imprisoned in some terrible camp and interrogations and trials began. A lot of people have been in camps for 10-15 years. The boy was spared - he was able to prove that he was captured unconsciously, heavily wounded and captured with the Germans did not cooperate, behaved decently. Instead of camps, he was sent to the mine, where he had to work for 10 years. The conditions differed little from the camps.
The only difference is the right to correspondence and the opportunity to sometimes go to the settlement, where their barracks stood. After about six months of torture work, he realized that 10 years he could not withstand. The health undermined by severe injuries and the prison camp began to give serious failures. Then one of the "former" people regretted the boy and advised him to commit a minor crime. Deskat will be caught, planted, but for a short time - a year and a half, and after the seizure will be sent to the place of permanent residence. The boy thought-thought and decided, entered the house of one of the peasants, stuffed something out of the food and clothes there, and got caught with the shelf. The trial was inadequate, given a year and a year later he was actually expelled to his native South Kazakhstan. After all these customs and adventures, he graduated from the Kaplanbek Zoo Veterinary Technicum, worked as a veterinarian in a collegiate farm and retired, soon quietly died.
This is the fate of man.

A glamorous Moscow girl comes to host her grandmother in the village.
Grandma, where can you go here at night?
In the cage.

The host of one popular show in the internet went on vacation, and now releases for him are conducted by everyone who is not lazy. Someone is successful, someone is not special. Recently, the show was led by two girls, and the video with them collected 30 tons of haunting comments. Here is one of them:

If I were stuck in a room with these two, and I had a gun with two bullets in my hands, I would have shot myself. and twice.

Discussion of status:

If you wear a cell phone in your pocket, there will be no children. But if you wear a cactus in the other pocket of the pants, then everything will be fine.

I have to wear the same.
What if I wear a condom in my pocket?
zzz: If in the same pocket with the cactus, then the children will definitely be.

I sold a coworker to Moscow, he asked a couple of kilograms of salt smoked there to throw, they have no such I bought from a neighbor, throw.
Cofr he met on the train, everything was great. And in the transition to him, the menta dogs made a stand, Menta turned him, pulled him into the guard to torture. They opened the coffin and found the salad. Hunted, Released

Be careful when transporting the hall! Around the danger.

From the orientation:
The appearance of the European type, the face is oval, convoluted.
I would like to look at the curved face of O_o

Listen, did we say goodbye when I left you?
YYY: Have you left? 0 0 0

He told Google’s voice search "Siri recognizes speech better than Google". The search line appeared "fuck". I thought long.

The inscription on the wall:
On the camel Lomonosov pierced the elbows. The courtyard snooker who met him remarked echoingly on this occasion: “Science looks from there!”
“Nothing, crash,” replied Lomonosov immediately, “dumbness is looking there!”

The troll is the beginning.

Commentary on the interview with Metropolitan of Novosibirsk and Berdsk Tychon.
Lord Tikhon, pray to God for us!
Who prevents you from praying for yourself? Stand on your knees and ask for what you need, not forgetting to thank for what you have.
zzz: The ruler has a higher skill and a chance on Crete.

SASHKER: Someone broke into our server
It looks like NATO.
13th: on that

In the morning before the psychiatric exam, I was pleased with the inscription on the wall of the hospital:>I was here. Lena< and below added >Well and fool!<

Mussolini was wonderful.
Didyseven: and green tea with roses is just magical
Didyssen: I'll go to the pub to make sure I'm still a man

<Phoenix> American experts have established that a normal adult American televisor is unable to perceive and track the sequential deployment of any topic for more than three minutes; then he loses the thread of conversation and becomes distracted."
<Archon> and read thoughts longer than 140 characters :)

by 111:
Yesterday rubbed as in the series a guy thought that his washing machine will call on the mobile when he finishes washing, and today I read about the new cars from Samsung presented at CES 2012

by 111:
You will not believe...

I went out of work to smoke today. Wearing a jacket. Ten minutes later, on the way home, I thought I had forgotten my bag at work. The fucking!! Working!! to
The manager and the customers were surprised.

I go to the subway for an interview, to be arranged as a accountant for work, just finished the institute, the mood after a quarrel with the girl is disgusting. One woman, forty years old, thought that I was too disturbing her, not letting her pass. Instead of polently asking me to move, I began to scream loudly on the whole wagon, which I am a goat, like a young man, completely overwhelmed and almost matte. I did not argue, listened to everything, and polently sent this foolish woman on the pit, and left the wagon to get on another train, because it would be impossible to go with her. I arrived safely at the office, talked to the chief recruitment officer, and she led me to communicate with the chief accountant. He takes me to the office, and there this aunt, out of the car... Naturally, I was not taken to work=(

Zeus was forced to fulfill the request by appearing in the flame of lightning, and Semela was instantly embraced by fire. Zeus had the time to tear her out of the womb a premature fetus, squeezed in his hip and successfully carried it. Thus, Dionysus was born by Zeus from a hip. When Zeus was suffering from childbirth, Poseidon served him with tuna.
c) The Wikipedia