I read my favorite:
There are three types of guys nowadays:
A smart fool
2 Funny Fools
Three Beautiful Fools

He: Who am I of the three?
I: Oh, I don’t know
He: No, you tell me
I: You are sunny and smart, and fun, and beautiful.
He is a writer. It is only you who can do so.)

My husband often takes work home for the weekend. When he is passionate about solving a problem, he does not like to be distracted. At the same time, he is a passionate coffee lover, and without coffee he can’t work. He sits behind the compass, I see – the cup is empty. She went, cooked fresh coffee, and on chickens, on chickens, slowly crawled to her husband from behind... She carefully cleaned the empty cup, put a full cup in her place, and turned the pen so that her husband didn’t need to do excessive body movements. And so three times. Once again, bringing the empty cup to the kitchen, I hear the husband’s scream:"Ah, I’ve gotten it!" And then:" And I think – so what! I drink coffee, I drink, and it doesn't end, and it's hot all the time, for several hours! My brain almost exploded!" I tried the best, and again the fault :-)

The dumb aqualancer Vasily read on the lips of a white shark that he is fucking

Before the Diploma. I make a title.
Who is Ivan?
- GNID
This is understandable, and scientific degree?

Helg changes his nick to Ivan-Zarevich
<the frigid> the princess has appeared?))
<Ivan Tsarevich> It is not so. Yesterday I heard the story of a princess and a dragon.
Ivan-Zarevich: Because I climbed to Anka through the window on a drainage pipe, trying to avoid meeting her dad. He ran away by jumping out of the same window.
<cold> daddy was flaming with the fire?)))
<Ivan Tsarevich> The popes spit the mat. The role of the nails is played by the icebreakers.
And the meaning of the fairy tale about Koschey came to me three years ago, when I spent several months treating one wonder, and eventually was taken to Europe by a forty-year-old major.
<Ivan Tsarevich> And who I am lying to...
Ivan-Carevich changes his nick to Ivan-Durak

The reports of the German soldiers who visited Afghanistan were dry and rather boring: we came to a camp, lived in containers for fifteen people, we had little medicines, the ration worked poorly. The nature in Afghanistan is beautiful and the roads are bad. The Afghans are a friendly and hospitable people. It is a pity that they do not recognize women’s rights.
When I returned home, I divorced my wife, became an alcoholic and fell into a psychic.

Especially cultural:
Asked by? We answer!

Nick'o'lay Vavilov
That’s why when a person can’t solve the simplest square equation, or does not know what a diode bridge is needed for, everything is okay, not everyone has a technical mindset. And when a man doesn’t know who wrote “One Hundred Years of Solitude,” he’s a fool, an analphabet, with whom there’s nothing to talk about.

There is such a concept of "the general level of culture", and "One Hundred Years of Solitude" fits into it, but there is no diode bridge.)

"A hundred years of humanity" ends up in "wanted-read, nothing lost". A "General level of culture" is not to go past the urn

Now in the dining room was a dialogue client [K] with the employee of the dining [SS]:
Q: in the menu "vegetable soup", is it borscht?
SS: No, it is a bowl.
Q: Is carrots salad just carrots?
SS: Not very much.

He has a thought in contact on the wall.
During my stay in Peter, I stopped being surprised by many things. But the girl with a wheelchair, inside which a child rushing down the road on rolls from about 15 km / h made a lot to rethink :-)"
I imagined, I thought...

I don’t want to live in a country where blue people are intolerant to homophobes!

XXX was so bad! :) in the broadcast "living wellOverhealthy". They stand four (Malysheva and three men) and Malysheva says - today we will talk about vaseline and its application. Those three guys rub their hands. :D

He is the first, dear.
She: Give up your favorite :*
He: Now I understand why we stand together...
She : Why?
Both of them are wrong-handed...

Natalia is pregnant!
Oh well rally?! to
I guess it’s more vaginal...

Akurochkin: Because our Great Ancestors lived, worked, suffered and perished... friends and fought... through tears and blood... day and night... openly and secretly... on the battlefield, in prisons, in scientific laboratories... forever, continuously, battling the beast.

nopy4uk: Kurochkin, I have seen many explanations in life, but these ancestors who have lived, suffered and died in scientific laboratories for centuries have overshadowed them all. is genius. Did you have white mice?

The courier threw the general and chief in the stupor. Giving them documents asks.
Where can I repair a tie?
The headmaster replies that there is a mirror beside the secretary. He nodded and said he needed another mirror.
The general and the chief in a stupor, what kind of mirror does he need if all the ladies are cheerful there and where is his tie hidden if he is in a sweater and a jacket? Five minutes later, the courier admitted he needed a toilet.

Good for people who have young children or siblings. You can calmly and with dignity go to any cartoon, type "baby brought" :)

xxx: boys, walked with a girl and at the end of the bathroom accompanied her stood at the entrance wanted to kiss her but sneezed and my snake flew out on my cheek. Mine has another chance to see her, as you think. I liked it very much (
I think it’s a legendary success.
Zzz: Tell that in your tribe this is the highest form of sympathy.
Kkk: Well, at least I didn’t get rid of it.

Pavel: Do you have a car?
Christians are there.
Will you give me it tonight?
Christine is lady. Why did you ask about the car?! to

Neighbors collect signatures "Against ants". Isn’t it too self-confident to try to destroy those who survived the dinosaurs?

The term “bear service” now has a special political shade and a state scale.
Joseph of Egypt