I was all in the fuck! I fucked the speed of light. I am the sun, the moon, all the planets through the whore! I fuck a black hole. I am fucking anti-matter!! to

Physics as a first lesson?

During the Census:
Q. What is your size?
Eeeee eeee eeee eeee!!!! to
Apartments and apartments!

Oksana: the fucking went into the kitchen and suddenly...feed me

“I have to upset you, your daughter was drunk in the club yesterday!
You are lying! She took nothing into her mouth yesterday.
I think I will upset you twice.

I decided I mean to buy a jacket for the winter, I go to the store, let me think I'm snooping (seller girl 25 years old)
I (GROWTH 194cm WEIGH 110 kg): Girl, and you have a chest armor 264 lv?She:(second 10 looks at me)Not a young man, on taurine dk we all ended...

Why are you silent?
(M) - I have a megaprocess of cooking dinner, so I'll get stuck for a while
(M) - But you write for now, I like this cook-ku in asskoe very much :) You feel necessary :)
(G) - I can imagine your aska :) A crowd of babies, everyone is sitting and cuddling, and Vadim Victorich in the kitchen is growing self-esteem :D

A friend lives alone, always behind the compound in his headphones, he hears nothing, sees nothing. There is no bell at the door, you can’t call the trumpet either.
So we wrote him long ago on the door: "Do not knock on the door, knock here: ICQ 200..4756". And fucking, you really approach the door, and from the mobile phone you knock on him in the aska, say open the door!)

There is a maniac in the city.
Did you take him?
No, he fucking and stinging.I am not pleased with the last.

I did my own piercing.)
222 Where is it?? to
Do you know what intimate piercing is?? to
222 I know.
111: so... I don’t have that)) I pierced my ear)
222 Fouououououou

A friend of mine, Peter, recently came to me. Walking around the center, I tell him about the centuries-old enmity between Peter and Moscow. We pass by the monument of Kutuzov, he asks me who it is. I answered "Kutuzov". A friend asks me what he did. I answer: "The Burning of Moscow". His eyes had to be seen.

My boyfriend returns from the army after 2 months:
I'll come - I'll drink a week, then a week of sex, then a week of sleep. And then I am a normal person.

Who will you have sex with this week?

You will not be accepted.

I can’t wait so long in a row 😉

Well, with breaks for sleep and food.

And for romance. I’m a girl, I just don’t want it, I want romance.

It will be romantic.

Can you think of anything so romantic for me? Or are you going to fuck again?

Q: Can I just kiss you for a week and then romance and flowers?

WOW: Well I think you can only have a week to recover your brain, then I want romance!! to

Will you come and I have a month? 😉

No need for monthly.

I may bother you, but I can’t control some of my body’s processes)))

You did not serve in the army.

I was not taken for that.)

Nothing warms your appetite like cold vodka.

In 1990, in one of the colleges, they decided to celebrate Victory Day.
45 years from the date of completion. And according to tradition, it was necessary to prepare a speech of the frontman before agricultural workers. In the colloquium there was one, and not a simple one, but with the star of the Hero.
Earlier, he was invited to rallies on the occasion of the celebration of Victory Day, but there was an extensive speech required, with some details of the fight against the fascists. In order for everything to go as well, the chairman decided to prepare the frontman, discussing the topic of the speech in advance. For what the veteran, during the reception hours for personal matters, was invited to the office by the chairman. Having explained the situation to the veteran, the chairman took out two cups, a bottle and a simple snack from the safe, in order to disappear all the offices of the meeting.
“Well, Petrovich, I need to tell you what you were awarded for.
“Hero of the Soviet Union,” the chairman said.
Another fifty more.
Petrovich silently turned the second, smelled a piece of salt and said:
- So what to say here, for fear - that's why - and put empty
glass on the table. The President was surprised:
- I don't understand you, how is that? he said, filling again.
How, how, and so on. You are a wise man, here you go:
We forced Dnieper, but we could not stand on that shore.
The Germans were there fortifications, and the tanks they constantly supported us. A is
The guns had not yet arrived at our site, here they should have arrived. by V
When we threw our squadron out on that shore, that was where it began. Half of
The squadron immediately shot, who died, who was seriously wounded. I chose myself.
position better, and let the machine gun water. What will the tanks do?
The bullet. And I cut it all, and the bullet got overheated. The grenades in
The move went. Then again I was scared, I was scared.
There was an explosion and silence. I cut off for a while,
It turns out. I woke up, scratched the earth, and let’s scratch again.
With tanks. The tanks are already far away, walking behind. It turned out,
While I was unconscious for a while, our artillery began, the guns started.
came to. We had a difficult place, but we got over.
Then I was told how I was awarded a star. As we were thrown out on that shore, the top command was watching us. Remain or not. When I broke up, everything was quiet. It turns out, I was shooting one of the machine guns - there was no one. But then it happened that I also woke up, and our guns began to shoot. I shot again, I was young, it was scary. At that time, the commander looked at me from that shore in the binoculars. One fighter is brave, one holds. I was not afraid.
I don’t know how, but I was sent off the show. That’s how I got a star.
– Petrovich, well, so it was scary – it was nothing. He did not give up and
You went away, just because you didn’t get such a reward.
I would not flee anywhere. You know, I missed a bigger...
The trousers... a whisper. from fear. voluntarily and consciously.
There was no return to the road. That’s what you do, Mr. President.
Take a stand and don’t dare to give up. Maybe it was rewarded for that. I am,
After the war, I told you the first thing. This is my move.
The president, after thinking a little, poured out more and said:
We will not say anything about your work.

“I have to upset you, your daughter was drunk in the club yesterday!
You are lying! She took nothing into her mouth yesterday.
I think I will upset you twice.

On top of the majority, feed the pigeons not with bread crumbs, but with oatmeal crops.

A long time ago, I said, we need to ban hentai, there are many suicides among children in Japan.
ууу: then the TV should be banned in general - somehow we got drunk with gasoline "to become a transformer".

I have a computer for two, I try to win back.
Will you release my computer today?
M: No
I: How strange the words "yes" sound from your mouths.

c) June

Excerpt from the conversation between the censor and the censor:
Do you speak other languages besides Russian?
YYY: Administrative and Household
XXX: What kind of one?
YYY: The mother

P.S C.C. Sobyanin - the future mayor of Moscow, worked in a pipe factory in Chelyabinsk as a sludge... Just a coincidence or did Dolin come to help gay people in Moscow?

xxx: On television showed how the correspondent came to Putin. She asked the second question: "Your gender", which caused a general laugh. He still doubts! I suspect something!

YYY: You did the right thing...

xxx: And the first question, by the way, was "Your F.I.O."