A call from a comrade.

T: I had viruses in my computer, I cleaned them, but
Now the computer is crazy.
I: (knowing the lazeriness of the comrade) and how did you determine what the
Are you viruses?
T: Well, I went to the Windows folder, and there’s a lot there.
files, so here are those with unknown name I and
removed it.

by ZANAVES

X: And then these two dibilloids went on an attraction to ride, like mining chariots, coupled with a steam truck, and when there automatically a photo is taken, they decided to get out and grabbed their hands. They were in different chariots. Lenya stretched his hands, and Kolyan, in the front car, threw his hands back. And there is a kind of big cat, well, bitter. As a result, this imbitil has the elbow ligaments broken, sits in a plaster and can not even print! The picture has worked!

Just invented a new series for Dr. House... >_<
Patient with blood-red all types of stools. The analysis shows nothing. The patient almost dies during treatment.
They suspect everything. Everyone is in shock. Symptoms are not suitable.
And then Dr. House accidentally notices that a caring wife feeds her husband with a salad "cake under the shirt"!!! The mystery is solved!!! to

Our gender gave out:
Leadership is easy to lose. I usually get up at 8-30, but today for various reasons I got up at 9-30. As usual, he first went to kindergarten, his daughter lies and reads lectures by Richard Feynman. All would be nothing, but she is 8 years old."

A: Are you complaining?
B: I am ashamed and I want to be red.
A: Take care, you will be ashamed again. People around.

He: It is not worth it. Better kiss me sweet on Saturday
I won’t live until Saturday!The Wild *
He: I will live only for that.
She says, “Hold your wings!”! to
He: I thought you were flying on a methole.
She: o_o what?!!!! to

Key13: Only our man on the comp has the folders ''All' and 'All 2''...

News read "Drivers who hit a military helicopter on the road, sentenced to a fine"
“The commander of a submarine that landed at the airport without the dispatcher’s permission is removed from office.”

kisa95: is it normal when a guy is younger than a girl by 4?and he looks 15-17.
La Ink: ah, if you have 14 and a guy 10, read better the literature asked for the summer :)

111: what, have you already adopted the bill "on the police"?
222: Not yet, but will soon
222: and they will ride fashionable, on fords with beads, with the inscription "protects and serves" and weep in the roof "press on the side, masafaka! hands on the wheel and no foolishness, we are with weapons! Do not joke with VCPD (Police Department of Voronezh City)"

Paranormal (18:51:36 23/09/2010)
We put a shorter record who for 30 seconds more times will say in the microphone "crack-crack-crack-crack-crack, etc" then listened to the recorded file and counted, and then tried to break the record received (to say this it had to be faster and faster with each new attempt). I don’t know where the boss came from and how long she watched us before we noticed her. This month we have no prize.

From the comments:

Ivan the Terrible was bisexual. You can say a homosexual.

He was on the whore of everyone. This is another.

A couple at the military department, a stream of the economic faculty, a preacher, a strict Lieutenant Colonel with a serious mouth:
The Czech Republic, a wonderful country, has never fought with almost anyone.
Some will attack them, some will surrender to them, others will attack them. Excellent position
The most important thing in life is to move your feet in time. But do you know, comrades future economists, what this is called?
Uncertain from the rear: Prostitution.
Prepod: This is what you will all do in the future in our country, it is free entrepreneurship.
Everyone in O_O...

YYY: Are you saying that Seregha has a heck injury?
Oh, he didn’t have enough gasoline to get home with his old BMW, so he decided to get into the tank...
Who knew that when he puts a cock in the tank, the car's towel suddenly breaks and it turns.
XXX from Gorky.
xxx: in short, this fox ran after her with the fox in one hand and the keys in the other another kilometre at least %)
J4R

He witnessed a conversation between the couple:
My dear, I am delayed.
The sun, don’t worry.
She: It is you, don’t worry. If this child is from you, I will not have an abortion.
Then there was a long pause, in a few lengths...))

The top of despair is when a girl dances a striptease to her vibrator)))

The smart word yesterday in the text took and replaced all the words "mand" with the words "panda".
You are an old panda. Riding the wheels, raising the villas from the ground.

<moon> it seems to me, or it is not a coincidence, that the LG KP500 advertisement in the Eurosite sounds a piece of the song "Underwood", where the preface sings: "Dear, I bought you a jerk"?

Did I feel something under my mouse so that it could be?
The carpet?

From Livejournal:

Mr. Daiver:...I remember in my childhood when I needed to eat the second, I took the cottage, put it on the bottom of the plate, rolled the potatoes or ham and so on. Everything was beautiful and looked like an island. He imagined himself as a treasurer or a pirate. And he gradually ate, and with a fork like a spade he dug the cottage which was in the middle. I cooked it, and it was like my prize for eating a garniture.

mr_daiver: You can even write a book about how to get kids to eat cocktails and garments. Practical and theoretical guidance."

I remember that my grandmother had plates with deer painted on the bottom, and that if I ate a potato, my grandfather buried a deer with it and said that he needed to be released.

mr_daiver: Oh fucking ruthless like, another wonderful method in my book xD Wait on the shelves)
1st The Pirate Method
2nd The buried deer method.